How well did your mother handle the talk about periods?

[duchesse]

I just remembered earlier how very badly my own mother had handled it. As far as I remember, my sister and I were just hanging out in my bedroom - I must have been about 14 and she was about 12.5. We very rarely hung out together so my mother must have been spying on us to get us both in the same place. My mother opened the door, chucked a pack of sanitary in on the bed, said "Here, you might need these" and shut the door again. My sister and I just looked at each other and burst out laughing, it was so ridiculous. She never said anything more about. She was so obviously paralysed by embarrassment that I actually felt sorry for her. Lucky we already knew about periods etc, and were quite late starting (in my case anyway- my sister and I both started at the same time).

Terrible. It didn't involve talking.

Gosh, Poinsettia, did she do a demo?

Or did she shout?

I was 12 on holiday in Bali.

Told my dad who said err I'll get your mum..

Bought me some pads no 'talk' as such.

She told me on a train going from London Bridge to Welling, in the rush hour. I had been to the train loo and read the label on the "sanitary towel disposal unit" and asked her what a sanitary towel was. I was eight. The carriage was spellbound.

One of my friend's mothers said "welcome to the world of women" when her periods started, which makes me cringe to think about.

My mam never had the talk with me, she knew I had had it at school, so never bothered. I can remember starting my period, and slipping a little note under her bedroom door letting her know. She bought me some sanitary towels every month, and I can remember her buying me a box of tampons one month without telling me about them.

I've never had a good relationship with her tbh, she is so emotionally anal at the best of times.

She ordered me a little book through one of her magazines, I think, and left it on my bed. She would leave sanitary towels on my bed. I think she did say, 'do you have any questions?' after passing on teh book.

My mum never managed to tell me about anything... periods, boys, sex, life.... I was left to figure it all out myself.

I learning about periods from teen magazines and friends when I was about 12. I realised I would need tampons at some point, tried on of my mum's (before my periods even started) to figure it out, then asked her to buy me some. She just looked rather surprised and shocked (I think the fact that I was rapidly approaching puberty has completely not occurred to her), realised I was right and bought me some. Never got a talk of any kind.

My mum taught me abysmally. She sent off for a pamphlet from Good houseeeping Mag written by 'Sister mary' or something when I was 13.

it told me

Not to buy white underwear as it goes grey in the wash

Only married women used Tampax

Boys wear cricket boxes for sport

All set for puberty then, me!

Oh, and she bought me a sanitary belt and house brick pads which rode up my back during netball

It was all very embarrassing. I don't recall discussing it as such before they started, although am sure it must have happened as my mum was such a hippy earth mother wimmin together type, but I remember when I got my first one she came rushing in and hugged me, quavering "oh darling, you're a woman now". I practically died on the spot.

Miss her loads now, of course.

My mother didn't tell me anything, although I knew about it through my sister who was a year older.

Then when she started they were both locked in our room together for ages, much low talking and changing of sheets (everything was dramatic with my sister.)

I had a cramp one Friday evening and told her when she came in from her drinking session visit to my auntie's. Then when the floods had opened the next morning she said 'there's some pads in the drawer in my room - that must be why you had that pain last night.' End of.

She didn't I watched a educational cartoon in school and then got a book

Then when it came to sex she didn't either, thank God for teeny magazines thats what I say!!

Even when I was going out with dh (16) she said well are you serious serious
I said yes
She nearly swivered the car into a ditch then said (in quivering tones) as long as your taking precautions

ThankGod I was a sensible young lady

She never had a talk, left it to my school who handed out a Kimberly Clark-sponsored leaflet in one of our cookery lessons (keeping all the women's things together, presumably). When I started my periods I didn't tell her - she found out about a year later (having asked our GP why I hadn't started!), was upset I hadn't said anything and then offered to pay for any supplies I might need. By that time it was way too late to be able to discuss things as I was almost 16 so we never mentioned them or anything of a personal nature again. Very sad, really, determined not to make the same mistake with dd.

My Mum didn't bother. I was fairly precocious and read about it in the library when I was quite young.

The sex talk however. Hmmmmmm. I was 16. My Mum's opening line was 'sexual intercourse is a beautiful thing between two people'. I think I laughed and told her it was a work of art between three. She gave up.

Dad gave me a sex talk at about 14. I remember it exactly:

Boys are nice but you don't have to bonk all of them.

I think he pitched it well.

ROFL at your dad, gingerbread. Wish someone had said that to me...

Madam, like you I've always been pretty open with my girls (and boy) about periods. The lack on privacy in this house when they were small meant that they saw me changing pads ("mummy nappies") and asked questions. I think I understand why my mother found it so very hard to broach- she found it very embarrassing herself, and had been brought up to think that it was all very dirty and not to be mentioned at all. I do think that I learned a lot from the way my mother handled it- about how not to do it.

And Gingerbread, your dad sounds fab.

Gingerbread, that reminds me of my Mum's comment after a friend got p/g age 15
"If you're going to do any thing silly, Takver, I do hope you'll be sensible about it"

My mum was great. When I was 10 she bought me some bits and pieces (pack of sanitary towels, pack of tampons, a book on puberty) and put them in a box, sat me down and talked me through the book and pointed out the towles and tampons instructions. Then told me to put the box somewhere safe for when I needed it.

As a result the day I started my periods I just had much the same reaction as nowadays, which is "hmm, dammit" and I was completely relaxed about the whole thing.

I asked hercwhen I was 11 what periods wee. She said "oh hang on" and got me a book to read. I think it was from the Woman's Own.

Never discussed in our house so when i had a flood on the way home on the school bus i was horrified. Mum was at work so had endless baths and changing of knickers (not a clue about periods at all) which obv didn't work lol.

When she arrived back form work i cornered her in the kitchen and said i thought i had cancer as i was bleeding.

She took me upstairs and showed me where thre bricks sanitary towels were kept and that was that really. Oh and she told me never to keep my towels in the bathroom and to keep away from boys!!

I will make sure the dd's are better prepared than i was. Also made sure the ds's (18 and 14) knew about periods too. Had to really with a mum who used to have raging PMT lol.

He used to ask if i needed painkillers and a hot water bottle too. He is nice to his gf when she has her period too.

My goodness, gal, that's actually worse than having sanitary towels lobbed at you. You must have been terrified.

I was given a booklet. No talk at all.