How well did your mother handle the talk about periods?

[duchesse]

I just remembered earlier how very badly my own mother had handled it. As far as I remember, my sister and I were just hanging out in my bedroom - I must have been about 14 and she was about 12.5. We very rarely hung out together so my mother must have been spying on us to get us both in the same place. My mother opened the door, chucked a pack of sanitary in on the bed, said "Here, you might need these" and shut the door again. My sister and I just looked at each other and burst out laughing, it was so ridiculous. She never said anything more about. She was so obviously paralysed by embarrassment that I actually felt sorry for her. Lucky we already knew about periods etc, and were quite late starting (in my case anyway- my sister and I both started at the same time).

My mum didn't tell me anything.

All the girls at school were taken off to the hall one day, instead of doing games, to watch a video and listen to a talk about periods. We must have been about 11 at the time.

We were given a leaflet which I showed my mum so that she knew that I knew IYSWIM

She was fine, very factual and informative except the cringeworthy bit where she offered to show me how to insert a tampon.

Actually I'd always known, ish, since she'd had me drawing diagrams of the human reproductive system since I very first started asking questions about where babies come from. So well before I started my periods, I knew what to expect. (She'd just finished a zoology degree when I was born and was rather keen to share her knowledge of biology. )

God, it could have been so much worse for me and my sister. I must ask my two younger sisters how she handled it with them. I suspect she hadn't improved much.

my mum got a packet of pads out of the cupboard when my sister was 10 and i was 9 and said. these are for periods. you will start them soon and when you get yours you will know.

that was that.

i am trying to be as open with my DD when she asks questions but she is an enquisitive almost 4 year old and wont be at the period stage for at lease 4-5 years yet

Edam, how could she?

DH is going to do the talks with DD's, I told him so, he's the doctor.

So what if I'm a nurse, I can't do it.

From about the age of 8 my mum and sister kept saying that they wanted the "talk" with me. They handled it really badly they kept laughing every time they mentioned it and it made me feel very ashamed to be growing up. Every time they tried to have the "talk" I would put my hands over my ears and run out of the room. I learnt everything I needed to know from Jackie and Blue Jeans anyway.

The whole puberty thing was not dealt with well, when I started growing breasts it was the talk of the family and they would make jokes about it. I was so paranoid that I would only have a bath if I could wear my swimming costume as I was worried that my stepdad or brother would burst into the bathroom as the lock on the door didn't work. I'm making it sound like my family were evil, they were not but they clearly had no idea about bringing up an adolescent girl.

I was like gal. My mother never told me a thing and i started at school. I had no notion what was happening until I stood up to leave the lesson and one of the girls grabbed me. She took me to the loos and explained , showed me where to get towels from the dispenser and even helped me wash my skirt . Thank you so much Susanne, you were an angel - where ever you are!( Just in case she is an MNer )

When I got home, soggy and embaressed afterthe coach journey with mocking teenagers I told my mum and she said
"oh good"

My mum did the 'talk' quiet well. Not emmbarrassed at all, answered questions etc, discussed different sanitary products and what I'd like to use. But then after the talk she ruined by telling me I must never talk of this to anyone. Not my sisters, not my school friends, definately not my dad. NO ONE.

Which made me feel like periods were something you should ashamed about. I was scared to go to the shop for tampons because the women in the shop 'would know'

I think with my dd I just want it to be something they just know about iyswim, rather than having a big talk. I let them in the bathroom with me and answer any questions they have. Well it's only dd1 (6) who has any questions. Dd2 (2.7) just accuses me of poo'ing myself when she sees

Er...we haven't had it yet!

How did you find Lynette? I feel so very sorry for anybody whose periods started without them having any idea about it. It must have been so scary.

My Mum completely bemused me at 10 by furtively shoving me into a room before I went on a week long school camp mumbling something about me or one of my friends bleeding 'down there' but it was ok cos it meant I could have babies . All was clearer with a film we watched a few months later at school.
I didn't tell my mum for the first few months surviving on free samples but I was then forced to when I got my period on holiday...
I will be different with my dds (3 and 1) they already know that mummy has her period which means there is blood but I'm not hurt and I use tampons to stop the bleeding. I am planning to be far more open with them and dh is just going to have to lump it.

She didn't, my dad did.

Cannot remember how old I was but I asked my dad to explain the tampax ad where everything stopped. Can't remember what the hell he said, but I know I wasn't freaked out or anything.

My mum never mentioned periods until the day I started them.

I never got a talk before it happened and when it did happen to me (getting my period in macdonalds whilst out with friends) i came home and burst into tears in total embarrasment - my mum said its alright no need to cry you daft thing then ran over to our gobshite neighbours and blagged a pack of sannys to tide me over then the whole street new . I dont think it was mentioned after - not to reliable at getting me stocks so i bought them myself out of my paper round money as it was easier than the embarasment of asking. Its going to be soooooooooo different for my dd but dont know how yet

My mum gave me a bit of a 'talk' at about 10 I think,only about periods.
She bought me the thickDr White's panty pads that were around in the late 1970's.
I quickly progressed to Tampax under my own initiative as I thought you could see the'bulge' in my drainpipe jeans!
I told DD1 all about periods etc at an early age.I remember crying when i started but she was fine.
DD2 not started yet but knows what to expect.
DS knows,but isn't very interested
Will tell DD3 in stages as she grows,only 4 atm.
We are very open in our house about medical matters as we are doctor and nurse .

I don't think she ever did. We got told about it at school. I started at around 10yo and really reacted badly - I refused to wear sanitary towels and used to spend all evening scrubbing my school dresses clean (used to tie a jumper round my waist at school). My mum never commented. She used to leave her sanitary towels by the side of the toilet anyway. Once when I was about 13 she warned me not to use tampons but that was about it.

We never had a sex talk either beyond when I was 18 and had been seeing dp for a while she asked me where we slept at his parents house (still at school at this point). Then told me to be careful. That was it.

Ds (5yo) knows that women bleed every so often adn wear tiny nappies and that it means they are not going to have a baby. But he has no interest beyond that.

Actually while we're on the topic - can anyone recommend good books for this - my two are v. little so something simple but I'm sure others would appreciate some help - maybe we could write a mumsnet guide to 'the talk'

My mum was great, showed me how to insert a tampon and it wasnt bleurgh at all-It was a totally normal discussion about things i needed to know about-no embarrassment and no shame. I am so pleased she handles it so well!

I did know about periods btw from talk at school, friends older sister and teenage magazines it just never got mentioned at home.

Whenn I told my mum that my first period had started she hugged me and smiled, and said "Congratulations, my darling. Welcome to womanhood." I'll never forget that. ]

Boiledegg, I have no ruddy idea, didn't stay around to find out! Upshot was, when my sister started, she came to me as she wasn't risking my mother making the same offer to her...

I guess I finally get to use the !

My Mum had a very matter of fact approach to everything, we were drip fed information over time - we asked a question she answered it there was never A Talk as it were just lots of information as and when we were ready. As such when we (I have an older sister) started we just told her she said ok and sorted us out with products from that point on. There was no drama either way it was just part of life.

THis is how I aim to be with my own DD (nearly 4), she knows I bleed once a month I've told her that every month a ladies' body grows a cushion for the baby to attach to in the womb if her body doesn't need to grow a baby then the cushion washes away and that is what comes out. When she asks for more I'll tell her but they'll be no big Talk just questions answered when needed and obviously I'll ensure she knows everything prior to starting herself.

duchesse - I had a good friend who explained it all too me, and let me read her teen magazines; the problem pages were very informative.

My Mum was great. Sat down had chat when I was about 9. Told me all about periods factual, helpful, encouraged me to ask questions. Told me about how brilliant tampons were compared to when she was young having to use the brick sized sanitary towel with attractive belt. When had my first period knew what to expect, and when first used tampons next period had Mum shouting helpful advice through bathroom door!! Ah made me think although there were times during my teenage years I totally hated her, actually she was and still is a fab Mum.