how friendly is your 2 and half yr old?

[liahgen]

Because mine is complete;ly not at all. Not shy, just very un friendly. I swear she was born looking down her nose at the midwife and it all went downhill from there really.

Seriously, she is grumpy, won't even look at people and is very stroppy and we end up walking on bloody eggshells so we don't upset her.

She's 5th dc so am not a learner but have never encountered this before, except on a friend's child who is still like it at 4!!

Lets say if she wasn't my child i wouldn't actually like her very much.

When she wants she can be very sweet and she loves her mummy more than anything in the world.

It's driving me mad now though and I don't know how to tackle it.

Suggestions please and thank you.

Just ignore it. If she gets upset she gets upset-I wouldn't walk on eggshells. I expect she will get sociable later-she is still very much a baby.

Could she be on the autistic spectrum?

MY boys were delightful, my daughter far more choosy. People say 'oh she's shy', I reply no just ignorant!

I just leave her to it. The more I expect the less i get.

elenor you know I just had this conversation with a friend at school. I kind of said it joking but some examples are

If we have started the day wearing a cardigan for example, we come home, cardigan off, if we go out again at all that day, she must be wearing exactly the same clothes she had on originally.

won't leave the house without being properly attired, (ie if we in a hurry and I'm happy for her to sit in the car without shoes, that prompts massive trauma)

Insists on taking shoes off whenever we sit anywhere, (cafe, restaraunt, library to listen to a story etc)

has to sit in same place at mealtimes, (woe betide a visitor if they sit in her chair) tis just a normal chair

I could go on, the list is endless that seems to stress her out.

She's too young to be assessed though someone told me. Maybe it's nothing more than crippling syyness. I am not shy and find shyness very frustrating, although out of 5 dc's, 4 are shy!!

posie do you find when people talk to your dd's and they ignore the person, you explain, "oh they won't speak to you or whatever" the person goes on to say to child

Oh are you not talking??? What... I just told you she won't talk to you. Agggghh, said child becomes even more grumpy, (or maybe that's just my dd )

liahgen, I don't know whether your dd is a shy 2 year old or has other needs too.

my dd2 is as controllong as your dd sounds over the same kind of things - right clothes, getting in the car in the right order, being served meals in the right order, where her giraffe sits on the table (ffs) etc etc. Soem of it she has learned form her older sister, who is ASD, but most of it is not copied as it is not stuff that dd1 does/freaks out over etc. I too have wondered whether to get her assessed at times.

Which brings me to what I wnat to say - if you think there is an issue, your dd is NOT too young to be put into the system. If you are worried, ask your hv or gp for a referral.

thanks frog I do sometimes think t, but then I think oh i'm sure it's just normal 2 yr old behaviour.

I guess getting someone else to see her wouldn't hurt would it. At least if it's nothing, then I'll know she's just bloody unfriendly.

thanks.