Is it common to feel 'fed up'.

[Cookiemg]

Hi

I have a daughter who is almost 7 months and although I love her more than anything I have an overwhelming feeling of being fed up. I feel that more and more i have less enthusiasm to entertain her and I slightly feel that I am gettinga bit fed up of the 'mummy world' and am looking forward to starting back at work.

I just feel that life is a series of obligations and drudgery at the moment, am I needing some balance back?

x

Yep. It's really normal to feel like this. I feel like this very often and I have two urchins. And going back to work can sometimes just mean you have more to do with no extra rewards (because all your salary ends up going on childcare and you spend more because you are too knackered to shop around etc.)

But it does get better.

And no-one will admit this but babies are quite dull most of the time.

Yes, feeling fed up seems to come with the territory, at least some of the time. If you find yourself feeling fed up all the time, then it's time to reassess how you actually are and how you've set things up.

But, if you have stages of feeling fed up and then periods when you're enjoying things then, yep, totally common.

Cookiemg, I could have written your post. What you are feeling is very common and totally normal. When I was pregnant, I had this vision of myself as a mother - it was one of tiredness, but one of complete bliss and fulfillment. Back in the real world, the tiredness is there, but some days I do feel so fed up, and dare I say it, bored out of my mind (this is the greatest taboo of motherhood IMO).

DS is 10 months now and I love him with all my heart, but it has been a bloody hard year. I thought it would be daily enjoyment but instead it's been a whole load of other stuff: constant worrying, the guilt that I'm not doing things right, the constant comparison of babies, the milestone competition, the breakdown of relationships (in-laws), being irritable with DH because he can't fill the changing bag properly/is faffing on his laptop whilst DS pulls books off the shelves/hasn't noticed when his mother has made yet another dig at me/jealous that he gets to go to work and can sleep on the train and talk to real people in the office.

They say the first year is the hardest and by george that is true. I have often felt on the verge of tears and had an overwhelming feeling of thinking I'm not good enough to do this. Having said that, I have also felt utter joy, of which I never thought I'd experience in a lifetime. I am still looking forward to going back to work though, and I guess that it when I will find balance.

It will get better as time goes on - I promise.

Wait till you have number 2 (and then 3 or 4!!) - then the baby months will seem like a dream

Don't do more than is absolutely necessary around the house and for your DD, and get out and do other things that you want to do before she gets to the crawling/walking stage. Plan your time so you can do a bit of what you want to too.