Grr, DP can still not change a nappy properly.

[BertieBotts]

DS is 11 months old. DP has wriggled out of doing nappies more and more - to be fair he does work long hours and isn't home much when DS is awake, I tend to do bedtime as well so I get that one. But every now and again I insist he changes a nappy, wet ones he doesn't mind as much, pooey ones take a bit more persuading though and are the problem.

Firstly he doesn't make sure he has wipes or anything before he starts. So he will take the nappy off and then wander around in a panic holding DS out at arms' length. He needs 2 hands to do this so I have no idea how he intends to pick them up when he finds them! He usually asks me at this point to hand them to him (I did ask what would he do if I wasn't here, apparently he would put him in the bath) and then when he has them, wipes off the poo he can see from one angle and thinks that's fine! When I point out there is loads left all up round his scrotum etc he has a tantrum and insists I am "underminding" [sic] him. And walks off leaving DS naked, ready to smear poo everywhere

I do think it may be partly my fault for standing over him a bit much but I don't want DS to get nappy rash because he isn't doing it properly. What can I do, I know he is being an immature twat ridiculous about it but anyone else had this problem?

Leave him to it, go to the loo or something he will learn

tbh if you weren't changing the nappies properly when ds was tiny, then that was tough- he'd have got nappy rash and you would have learnt

I don't know about you, but for me, motherhood was a learning curve, these things didn't come automatically to me, and to some extent dcs had to pay for my mistakes

your dh needs a chance to go through the same learning curve

if he has to pick the nappies up by his teeth, then so be it; it's the only way he will learn

Doesn't seem very fair on DS though that he has to go around covered in poo and DP probably wouldn't even notice him having nappy rash.

So what happened when you were new to motherhood and made mistakes? Was that fair on ds? Or did you never make a single one? If so, you were unlike most of us.

Well he has been allowed to be this way. If he was in sole charge of the baby for any amount of time he would possibly have learned the hard way what to do with pooey bums
However my Nephew in law stated categorically that there was no way he would ever EVER change a dirty nappy.He stood by this to the extent of driving his son down to the babies GRANDAD (Mum ,Auntie and Granny were away for the day and the neighbours were at work) to have the baby changed.
Only now that the boy is 4 will he attend to any toiletty occurances . He was allowed to do this by his entire family (inlaws as well) and saw no good reason to change.
So you can either accept that this is how he is and make sure he does more than his share of other family stuff to compensate (I read of someone on here who taught her DCs to call for Daddy in the night time as Mummies cant hear in the dark !) or force him into the position of having to change your DS and run the risk of the boy having nappy rash .
If it were me I would prefer the former.

I think that if you werent there he would notice and do it properly