No sleep!

[Pierrette]

Hi there... I'm sure this is not a rare problem, but I'm at a loss as to how to sort out my 8-month old daughter's sleep pattern. She sleeps fine from around 8pm till 12 - and then wakes up every one to two hours from then on. She has a full bottle of formula around midnight and then breast feeds every time she wakes after that. I'm sure she doesn't need feeding at all - she has 3 big meals a day and eats loads - but it's the only thing I can do to get her back to sleep again! People tell me I should just let her cry it out, but it wakes my 20-month old (and the neighbours), plus I'm so exhusted I'll do anything to get her back to sleep. My husband helps out but he has to get up at 5am for work, so I'm very aware that he needs to get some sleep too. Any tips?

Hi there! It sounds totally normal to me, don't withhold feeds, she is only tiny and if she is hungry, she is hungry!

There is too much emphasis on trying to get babies to sleep through the night. She wil when she's ready.

DS who is 10mths old doesn't sleep through and still wakes up for about 3 BF's during the night but you know what? I'm not going to stress myself out about it. I'm just going to go with the flow. I think letting babies 'cry it out' is cruel and unecessary.

Have you tried co-sleeping? This is what I do and I get a decent nights sleep because of it. I couldn't magine having to get up and go to his cot several times each night to feed him.

Hi Pierette, my almost-8-mo dd2 has pretty much the same pattern as your dd. She goes down at 7, wakes about 12 and every 2 hours thereon.

Same as you- I have to bf her to back to sleep. I also don't think she's particularly hungry but don't know what else to do, I've tried leaving her to cry for a short while but she didn't give up and I'm not prepared for CC.

So no tips, just empathy.

Hey thanks, it's good to know I'm not alone! We do end up co-sleeping but I find it hard to sleep with 3 in a bed! My toddler keeps me on the go all day, so it really is exhausting and I'm suffering bad headaches through lack of sleep. But I guess that's what babies do eh... So many people have told me not to feed her through the night as it's getting her into bad habits, but I can't bear the crying. Grrrrrr.

Hi
I'm sort of inbetween here. If she has a bottle of midnight she's not hungry an hour later she does love your company and boob, and nothing wrong with that except practically you do have to look after yourself.

I did co sleep and many cultures all over the world do this so not against this if it works for you, which it clearly doesn't as you say you dont sleep.

I think I would put 20 mth temporarily in your room so dad and sibling can sleep and then help your 8mth old settle back to sleep without feeding. (Ideally you might need to invite a relative or friend around during the day so you could maybe catch up on some sleep!) I did do this with my DD (now 5) at around 13 mths. I did not leave her to cry it out but I just made my decision that she was not hungry and therefor did not have a feed. I lay her down in the cot and held her hand and repeated it lots. The key though is not to give in once started otherwise you have upset her and yourself for nothing!

It seems like its gonna take for ever when you are doing it but it actually took less than a week and she settled into a routine and woke about 6ish each morning. She would occasionally wake for a cuddle but once it had been received she would settle back to sleep which was fine by me. She still does actually. Sometimes she comes to get one and then goes back to bed other times she stays and we cuddle for the rest of the night (which I quite like and I guess she wont think its quite so cool at 12! Then I'll really miss it!

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.