24 hours in and I'm ready to throw in the towel!!!!!

[Snooch]

Just started potty training 27 month old DS yesterday and already tearing my hair out....not one wee in the potty yet, all on the carpet, including two poos! He ticks most of the "Ready to Potty Train" boxes but just seems incapable of actually going in the potty.

Today he woke up dry from his two hour nap nap, despite having drunk a huge cup of juice just before going down, so I took him off to the potty and after about 10 seconds said "no", which I thought was strange as he normally enjoys sitting on it. A minute later there was a waterfall all over the floor....then he started farting like crazy about 20 minutes later and I just knew he was going to poo, so put him back on the potty. 5 minutes later and a whole lot of singing and reading later, he said "no" again and got up. Next thing he's holding his bum and telling me it's sore (could see that he was holding a poo in), so back on the potty again....eventually did a poo in his pants a couple minutes later.

Am already so disheartened and fed up (also have a three month old to look after as well) that I've gone and put him back in a nappy.....now that I'm sitting here and typing this and have cooled down a bit and thinking I should probably just plod on, shouldn't I? Please somebody out there tell me that this can be overcome!!!

And please forgive my awful grammer (just re-read what I wrote)....just feeling so wound up and have a screaming three month old in the background!

which of the boxes is he not ticking? 27m can be seen as quite early for boys especially with a new baby in the house.

from experience ds1 was ready very easily and i was given a great piece of advice - make a note of all the successes and the accidents in a two week period. If you come out positive, even just by one, keep going.

it is only day one so reread your books, have a good stiff drink tonight and think - tomorrow is a new day

seriously, good luck - it's worth the pain!

The only one he's not ticking is the fact that he doesn't seem to mind a soiled or overly wet nappy too much - sometimes he'll tell me that he's done a poo, most times not. And when I do try and change his nappy (even when he's told me) it's a battle! But I guess that's just two year olds. A couple of weeks ago he was in the garden playing in his paddling pool and all he was wearing was a pair of shorts. The next thing he started shrieking and I rushed to him thinking that something had bitten/stung him, only to find that he was weeing - he obviously got a bit of a fright. Now when he does a wee (all over the floor) he just seems indifferent - will either just stand and watch it happening or not seem to notice at all!

We're going ahead with the training now as we're moving to a new house in September, plus his brother will need his cot soon, plus I'm starting work again in October! So now really is the best time as we have a gap, otherwise we'll have to wait until next year or so!

just out of interest why is the brother needing the cot dependent on potty training? DS1 has been dry in the day for a year almost but we stil put easy up pants on him at night so it's not a pressurised situation. it can take a lot longer for night time dryness to kick in.

just keep at it - and try and keep as calm as you can when there are accidents!

Flick, think the transition into a bed will be a bit of a battle with him as he loves his cot and is also a bad sleeper, but he has totally outgrown it and his little brother has totally outgrown the moses basket! Didn't want to impose too much on him - new baby brother, new big bed, new house.....am thinking I may just have to leave it until next year when he's close to 36 months and things have settled down a bit :-(

We're on day 4 and still not one success, apart from the two wees that I managed to catch in the potty when he got in the bath the last two nights (he will always do a wee on getting in the bath). He definitely knows what's going on which is why it would be a shame I suppose for me to give up - when he got in the bath last night I held the potty under him and asked if he wanted to wee - he said no and pushed it away. So I said for him to tell me if he wanted to do one so that he could do it in the potty, and after about 10 seconds he suddenly said "ok, make a wee" and waited for me to hold it under him and then did one! He's got the control, understands the concept, but seems to have some sort of "stage fright" whenever I take him to the bathroom as he will often have an accident straight afterwards.

Guess I shall just have to persevere....just so hard with a very demanding three month old DS2 on my hands as well as I can't give DS1 my entire focus and dedication, which is what potty training needs I have found!

To be honest, I think I'd give in. Probably not what you wanted to hear. I waited til dd was "ready" at 2.5 and she was dry within two days. So I would say that your lo is not ready yet, and that's ok. At 27m with a new baby and busy being two... I'm not surprised at all.

I am confused. If you need a second cot then why don't you see if you can get one off freecycle, ebay or a newspaper. Or you could use a travel cot even.

Personally I think you should wait a couple of months. Its not the end of the world and its no longer necessary for a child to be potty trained to start pre school.

We started DS2 at 27 months. I posted a few times about it. He was great at wees, but has only just cracked the poos some 3 or 4 months later.

It was a lot harder than DS1 who started at 2.9 years (sorted within a week), so perhaps you should wait a bit.

What worked (sort of) was bribery. He got a Thomas duvet cover - well we promised he could have it when he poohed in the loo / potty. He got it, lost it, got it again, lost it....but did get the message eventually. And then he got a scooter too once we'd had a few on the trot.

He's very proud of himself now, and I can hardly remember the low points.

Yeah.....my gut is telling me I should probably give up - not worth the stress and don't want DS2 to suffer from lack of attention - he really is just a baby and needs that more than DS1 needs to be potty trained. I have read on a few threads though (cant remember if it was MN) that it can be just as bad leaving it too late as it is to start too soon - things like 4/5 year olds asking for a nappy so that he can make a poo.....?! Basically leaving it so late that the child is almost untrainable? Am not convinced myself but interested to hear if anyone's had problems with an older child.

Reallytired, we dont need two cots, DS1 just really needs to move to a bigger bed - the cot is just too small. He's a big boy, on the 91st centile for both length and weight and keeps bashing himself on the bars every time he turns over in his sleep and then wakes up - he's an awful sleeper as it is so we don't need that on top of things! So yes, sorry, that's more of the issue than "his brother needing his cot", although he is also big (just above the 91st centile) and can't stretch his poor little legs out comfortably in the basket as he's so long!

PS Anyone want a moses basket and stand?? I'm in the London SW area....

snooch - we don't need them but lambeth freecycle is very active so there will almost definitely be someone there who will need it.

cat me if you like - I'm in SW as well but maybe a totally different SW area to you!

Sorry I've taken so long to reply Flick, but have been hard at work! Am EXTREMELY pleased to report that DS2, after 4 days of nothing but accidents, suddenly decided to "click", and did 4 wees in the potty yesterday afternoon!! And this all started with him actually BRINGING me the potty and telling me he wanted to wee - was gobsmacked! We've had a couple of accidents since then but that was mainly because he was too busy playing and I was too busy to remind him to go. Likes to stand and wee while I hold the potty for him so poos are another story of course but for now we're happy! So glad I stuck with it

I'm in Wandsworth, SW18 - would I still be able to use the Lambeth freecycle? Got a few other things as well with the house move and all that I'm sure people would be interested in.

well done
i must admit mine took one week first time round (absolute hell until the afternoon of the 7th day)

and then there was regression gngngngngn

but now fine.

btw, i really don't give credit to the training too early/ too late causing 'psychological damage' - i mean unless they go to school in nappies and have the p taken, they'll get it in time and be ok with it, after all, you don't know any adults with PT issues, do you?....

althouh that last probably belongs on an 'AIBU' thread...

Ha, no oneopinionated, I can't say that I know of any adults with potty issues, but you never know...........

Strange that, isn't it - how the first few days are hell and then suddenly,provided that they really are ready, BAM - they click! I honestly though it was never going to happen. He was so good today - as long as I reminded him from time to time, he would go and fetch the potty for me to help with it and would actually say "make a wee in the potty mommy". He actually got upset tonight after I had put him to bed and he made a wee in his nappy (I couldn't get to him quickly enough to get him out his cot to do it in the potty) - just cant believe that this is the same child that I originally posted about!

Have heard about the regression....am already dreading it.....

snooch well done!!!

no you wouldn't be able to use the lambeth one I don't think but go on the main freecycle website and there will be a lambeth group.

we were really lucky and didn't have any regression but you may have with the other changes - into new bed etc.

keep us posted!