HELP! Night time waking in a one-year-old!

[NobbyD]

I need some help as I am not sure if I am doing the right thing or making things worse! Need advice...

My DS is one year next week. Has always been a bad sleeper. We resorted to controlled crying at 8 months to get him off the bottle in the night. After three nights he started sleeping from 7 - 6am and was great. Then teething happned, I also went back to work and he is in nursery full time and since then his sleeping is awful again. Its hard to settle him at night (we NEVER had a problem before now - always bath, bottle, bed no probs) but now he just can't settle and pulls himslef up in the cot and screams.

Usually takes between half hour and an hour to get him to go to sleep but then he wakes about three times a night. Mostly I can get him back to sleep with a cuddle or drop of water but its the 4.30am wake up where he screams and screams until I give him milk but then he won't go back in cot and will just want to sleep in our bed or on the sofa with me.

Its driving me mad as I thought we'd cracked the sleeping but it seems we've gone backwards. It has been very hot recently - could this have caused it? Should I not give him milk no matter how hard he cries? Or is he genuinely needing it (growth spurt?).

I'm also concerned with his daytime naps in which he hardly has any. When I was at home with him I used to keep him awake in the morning and then put him down for nap after lunch where he'd sleep for 2 hours. But at nursery he is so over exited there that he doesn't nap well at all (max 20 mins or he'll just collapse in car on way home). Could this be affecting his night waking?

I know there is no one-size fits all with sleeping babies butany advice would be appreciated!

Hi Nobby. Sorry it's crappy at the moment

Just wondering - have you tried controlled crying again ?

Over-tiredness could be making it harder for him to get down to sleep. I'd try doing a nice slow wind-down a bit earlier (maybe half and hour) if he has not had a nap

The heat is probably not helping - put a fan in his room.

Whatever the cause, the waking and needing to be settled by you could easily become a habit again.

If you can face it, I would be inclined to try CC. I know there are some who disagree with CC, and they may have other ides, but it worked very well for me at this age. (genuine CC, not "leaving them to cry")

There are many, many threads on MN with circa 1yr olds having sleep problems, struggling to fall asleep, pulling up in their cots and screaming and frequently waking. One just last week in fact.

When they're just about to walk, sleep goes out the window. They cannot switch off, their brains tell them to stand up and walk All The Time and it disrupts sleep. There's research to back this up. And many, many MNers can confirm.

Personally I'd treat it as a phase as that's probably what it is. Do what you need to and it will pass.

Nobby - i feel your pain i really do! My DS has never been a good sleeper, doing ok at the moment but doubt it will last. I work 3 days a week and those days its so much harder, think its a combination of being over tired (which always makes for a disturbed night) and missing me. Is he eating ok at nursery?

We started to put him to sleep half hour later as always slept in car on way home from nursery, also giving him a piece of toast or something when we get in. He is the same age as your Ds and also at pre-walking/cruising stage and this has made it hard too!

Hope it gets better soon.

Thanks everyone.

screamingabdab - we tried doing the controlled crying with him both at bed time and middle of the night but he gets so worked up that he thrashes around so much and hurts himself, which makes things worse. We also put a fan in the room but it made no difference.

ShowofHands - I really do hope you are right. I had heard before that at walking stage sleeping can go out the window. I am just hoping that as screaming says it won't become a habit.

mummywannabe - Ds eats fine at nursery. He has dinner at home as OH picks him up at 4pm. yesterday he did a near perfect day (ate everything, had an hour half nap in afternoon and didn't fall asleep in car) but he still woke at 2am screaming! I was refusing to give him milk at this time but he just gor worse and worse where he was unctrollable. Even in my arms he would thrash around, scratch, scream, cry, choke! It was awful so ended up giving him milk at 3am which got him back to sleep but he woke again an hour later and then again at 6am and he is a grumpy thing this morning - really not nice to be around (which I hate saying but its true!)

I really do hope this is a phase as I really can't cope any more broken nights. Me and my OH argue every night as I end up in tears as I keep thinking I must be doing something wrong!

Nobby your not doing anything wrong, think you might have to just accept its a phase and roll with it. My DH and i argued about it too.