My brother, who lives in Australia and is married to an Australian, has been having marriage difficulties for about 18 months now. His wife had an affair throughout last year, and he did all he could to put right his contribution to the strain their relationship had been under, and to repair the marriage. From the beginning of this year, reconciliation looked likely.
However, on Friday, she took off unexpectedly on a plane to visit the man she was having an affair with. She said she'd be back Sunday, then Thursday this week, and now it's Saturday. My brother doesn't trust her, and obviously any progress with repairing their marriage has come undone.
My brother wants a divorce. Bittersweet news is that his wife is three months pregnant (with his child). They had fertility treatment, which was unsuccessful, before her affair, so didn't think they could have a child without intervention. They have now conceived naturally.
My brother has some reservations about his wife's mental health, because of the way she has behaved towards him over the past 18 months and some of the things she has written/said to both him and her lover. She seems very unstable. She told him as she left on Friday that if he considered leaving while she was away, that this would be extremely selfish of him considering he is due to be a father - in spite of them both knowing where she was going. This is at the same time as emailing her lover praising his willingness to raise another man's child - and another email (to the lover) saying she will have a termination. He (the other man) has said he wants nothing to do with her and didn't want to see her (he forwarded all her communication to my brother).
My biggest concern in this soap opera, and I think my brother's too, is that his wife will very likely be raising his child as a lone parent with mental stability issues. (Her mother experienced mental health problems during her childhood, and she and her sisters lived with their father when he and their mother separated.)
He knows, from her behaviour over the past few years, that she will likely use the baby as a bargaining tool and leverage against him. He isn't certain what he will do yet, but wonders under what circumstances he might be able to gain custody (or at least primary carer status) of their child. Anyone know anything about this, particularly in an Australian context? Thank you.