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Scenes of disaster to have greeted you in the morning...?

51 replies

BitOfFun · 14/05/2009 13:23

My most recent one with dd2 (she has special needs, but I am well aware that that is by no means a pre-requisite for the kind of thing I am talking about...) was going into her room in the morning to find that she had not only ripped her carpet up (which I had nailed down), eaten some of the underlay, but also pulled some floorboards up

She had strewn the room with some old newspaper which must have come from the murky depths beneath the floor...it was orange, and so old that there were news articles about Dennis Healey and Barbara Castle...she had probably eaten some of that too

So come on, who can beat that? I need to know if your children are as horrid as mine for purely healthy reasons of comparison

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mindalina · 14/05/2009 13:25

at floorboards

DS poured a four pint bottle of milk on the kitchen floor last week. At 11am we had a knock from the letting agents for the downstairs flat to ask if we had a leak somewhere as the downstairs ceiling was dripping

MerlinsBeard · 14/05/2009 13:26

AM not entirely sure that anyone could beat that!

When pg with DS3 i went in to wake DS1&2 in the morning to get ready for school. DS1 had cut ALL of DS2's beautiful long hair off into a number2!

Original poster
BitOfFun · 14/05/2009 13:29

Pmsl at the stinky milk...the place will reek

And the hair? Eeek! My mum used to be a primary school teacher and remembers one little boy leaning forward to the desk in front and cutting off ONE plait of the beautiful child's waist-length hair

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Gorionine · 14/05/2009 13:32

DS3 emptied a bottle of red food colouring on the kitchen floor. It looked like someone had been murdered there.

DS2 used to make little balls of wet toilet paper and litterally cover the bathroom walls with it, I even found some stuck to the ceilling on several occasions!

I still think your DD still has the best one though.

FrankMustard · 14/05/2009 13:33

Went into ds3's room when he was a toddler to find him standing on the bed with his (v.full)nappy tossed to one side of the room, trousers half round his ankles trying to reach his sock drawer!
Didn't feel I could scold him as he was only trying to get dressed all by himself!

Seeline · 14/05/2009 13:33

When my DS was about 2.4 (and I was about 6months pg) I came downstairs one morning to find that he had discovered his carefully hidden art set and had proceeded to experiment with the whole contents - it had poster paints, finger paints, glitter etc. It was all over the living room carpet. I had to spoon it up before I couldd even begin to think about cleaning hte carpet! Thank heavens for Vanish is all I can say.

Original poster
BitOfFun · 14/05/2009 13:35

I'm not going to exempt poo-encrusting surfaces on the grounds of taste and decency either (yup, that's happened too, thankfully not on the same day), so come and tell us about it here!

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pavlovthepregnantcat · 14/05/2009 13:35

Dh left our camping box on the kitchen floor. I had left the clean washing in the washing machine.

DD aged 2.11 took out the washing from the machine, spread it out on the kitchen floor, and proceeded to sprinkle sugar from the camping provisions all over the clean clothes, and floor. I walked in to find her sat there, tub in between legs, both hands pulling out handfuls of the stuff.

But, floorboards though, that is impressive!

largeginandtonic · 14/05/2009 13:44

Not sure i can compete with floor boards.

The twins age 20 months broke in to the fridge (it had a fridge lock, they did it alot) and poured milk all through the downstairs. They then got their tooth brushes and were sat eating yoghurts with them. We took photos it was hilarious.

They also used to take their nappies off and hide poo in drawers, spread on walss, beds etc..

oh the joy

booyhoo · 14/05/2009 13:54

ds has a thing for butter and often sneaks up to his room for a binge. several times i have gone in to find it smeared on his windows, inside and out!!!! strange, strange child.

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BitOfFun · 14/05/2009 13:57

Now twin poo-stashers I could not handle

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BitOfFun · 14/05/2009 13:59

Butter?? Doesn't it make him sick? Mind you, as I say, dd eats all manner of things...I live in dread that one day she will need an x-ray and she'll be like one of those Alsatians you hear about who has seventeen golfballs or similar in their stomach...

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screamingabdab · 14/05/2009 14:01

BitofFun Never mind the mess - she's got the strength of
Tessa Sanderson! You need to think of some way to harness this natural talent

Original poster
BitOfFun · 14/05/2009 14:05

Lol, I certainly do! The thing is, I suppose she doesn't realize that she's actually a dainty little girl, and her will is strong...it's like those documentaries where people lift cars off their loved ones or something: she just believes she can do it and it happens

Have you seen her pic on my profile? Butter wouldn't melt (butter on the brain now!)...

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booyhoo · 14/05/2009 14:06

you would think but no!!! ive had to discard so many tubs because he's deposited all manner of things in it,( cat fur, socks, combs, rice crispies...)

Pinkjenny · 14/05/2009 14:07

LG&T - PMSL at eating yoghurts with toothbrushes. Ingenious!

screamingabdab · 14/05/2009 14:08

Oh my God BOF , she's beautiful

Clearly the force is strong in this one ! She is a Jedi

SparklyGothKat · 14/05/2009 14:10

came down one morning to find dd1 and dd2 naked with fabric softener poured all over kitchen floor and them sliding over the floor.... look great fun

OhYouBadBadKitten · 14/05/2009 14:14

My most traumatic finds are little bird heads often accompanied by a bird liver.

One day I expect to find a bird head on my pillow....

screamingabdab · 14/05/2009 14:14

Sparkly Lol!

My DSs are actually too unimaginative good to do anything like this.

The worst thing DS1 did was to draw red crayon line alon all the wall in our 3 -story hall, one week after the whole thing was decorated (crayon is a bugger to get off - why do they make crayons for kids ??).

franke · 14/05/2009 14:16

Well apart from the obvious leaving ds2 nappyless for a few minutes while I mumsnetted got side-tracked and came back to find him swimming in his own poo there was the time when ds1 found the dried herbs drawer and decided to empty each bottle of them onto the kitchen floor. He did this several times - the hoover smelled gorgeous for weeks. I salvaged cloves and star anise.

@ floorboards - can't top that I'm afraid.

wannaBe · 14/05/2009 14:17

my ds once poured an entire pot of glitter over my livingroom carpet. Took me months to get rid of it. Glitter was banned from my house from that day forth.

And not a child but this christmas my dog (guide dog so apparently obedient and well trained and inteligent ) managed to open the lounge door, go under the christmas tree, and find the only two presents that were boxes of chocolates, and eat them both. a hasty trip to the vet insued the next morning to ensure he vomited so he didn't get ill...

lucysmum · 14/05/2009 14:21

Children in kitchen, mummy and daddy still dozing up stairs ...Dds painted dogs feet green because they wanted to do paw prints. Dog did not cooperate - ran all over kitchen, hall etc - green paint everywhere !

Blackduck · 14/05/2009 14:31

ds spread an entire jar of sudocrem all over himself and his bedroom. Mummy and daddy fail to learn the lesson so following week he followed it up with a jar of vaseline....

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BitOfFun · 14/05/2009 14:36

< snigger > Love the green dog feet!

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