Any Ideas for getting ds to poo in the loo!!!

[Monkeysmum]

I was hoping someone out there might have an idea for getting my ds2 (nearly 3 years old) to do his number 2's in the toilet/potty. When he was almost 2 he decided to potty train himself and for 3 months he was clean and dry even at night, so I know he can do it. He is still fine at night but during the day although he manages to get to the toilet to do his wees he always poos in his pants. I have tried everything I can think of, from completely ignoring it (changing him without looking at/ talking to him), to sticker charts, bribery,talking about the whole now you're a big boy thing but all to no avail. My third baby is due in a few weeks and i'd love to have it sorted by then, I do wonder whether it is the new baby's imminent arrival that is causing the problem, although he seems to be looking forward to it. All ideas greatfully received!!

Hi monkeysmum, I am in a very similar situation, can't help you atall but will also be watching here for advice. Ds seems to be woken up by his morning poo coming, about 6.50am so not sure what to do about training him to go in the toilet as he only does one a day. I will probably have to wake him at 6.45 but that just goes against ALL my beliefs - never wake up before you are forced to by small children! Im 36+4 and lots of mums are telling me not to bother training him before the baby comes as he'll probably regress.

So how long has he been pooing in his pants for exactly? My ds1 did this but it only lasted a few weeks. TBH, I am not very good at the "oopsy daisy never mind, Mummy will just get you a clean pair of pants" line (spoken lightly and cheerfully). I tended to go for the "OMG why didn't you say something? You know you are supposed to be using the loo" approach, and ds soon started using the loo. I did also bribe him with chocolate!

northstar - you might have a point about the regressing thing, I just can't ignore it though i'm getting so fed up with washing pants and I refuse to put him back in pull ups in case he regresses with the wees too! Hope you have more luck than me!!
Lonelymum - he's been doing this for 9 months now!! I have tried being cross too but he always says 'i'm really sorry mummy I won't do it again' and then the following day does exactly the same thing. It's driving me potty (pun intended!!) if it was just a few weeks I would think it was just a phase but 9 months seems stretching it a bit far!!

Does he poo at roughly the same time each day? Could you try putting him on the potty/loo just before that time and getting him to sit there for some time in the hope that something will emerge?

Unfortunately he doesn't have a set time for going, otherwise I could give that a go. Yesterday I took him to the loo to do a wee and he did a poo (it took both of us by suprise, first time in months i'd manage to catch one!) we made a big fuss saying how clever etc, gave him a sticker, today he's already done it in his pants again!

Sounds just like my ds1 - he had no regular time either.

Is the poo quite soft? My ds's poo was and I don't thik that helped as he probably didn't have as much time as he needed to get to the loo.

Is your ds quite happy about when a poo accidently comes out in the loo? I have heard some children have a hang up about pooing because they fear a part of their body is coming away.

snap!! although DD was potty trained at the end of dec.

She can get the poo thing when at home or whilst out but inside, but the minute she goes into the garden to play she poos in her knickers!!

i'm beginning to think that this might just be a stage, she had the whole poo and wee thing sorted and its only been the past 3 weeks we've been having these accidents. i had hoped that she would be all trained well before the new baby arrived in june and that she'd regress on something else - hopefully less messy!!

Thats a good point lonelymum I hadn't thought of that, it is quite soft (sorry TMI I know!!) he may not have much time to get there, although having said that I have caught him straining before now so he must have a bit of prior warning sometimes. He is really pleased with himeself if I do manage to catch it like I did yesterday, so I don't think it is a phobia thing, he ran around telling everyone afterwards including my bemused grandfather!
Katzguk - Lets hope we both get it sorted before June!