Night time training

[WigWamBam]

My dd is nearly 4, has been dry in the day for 18 months or so, but is nowhere near being dry at night. She has a potty in her room in case she wakes and needs to use it, and can get easily to the toilet from her room, but has never done either. She's dripping wet and needs her bed stripping almost every morning, although she tells me that she can never remember weeing in the night because it doesn't wake her up.

How do I start preparing her for going without a nappy at night time? What's the best way to try and make sure that she learns to wake up when she needs a wee? I don't really want to try lifting her, because she's such a good sleeper and I don't want to disrupt that. Any ideas for where I start?

If she's not waking up when she's weeing then personally, I wouldn't bother with training. She simply doesn't sound ready to me.

I had a "hands off" approach with DSs and took my cue from them. It was far less hassle to leave them in pullups at night than it was to deal with bed changing.

IIRC, there is a physical side to the being ready. Something to do with a hormone that slows down urine production and stops the bladder filling up so much when you're asleep.

I presume you've talked to her about it?

I'm not sure she's ready either, but it's getting a real pain having to wash the sheets so often, and she's getting upset about it too, although we've never criticised her for it. She's in pull-ups, but they just don't seem absorbent enough to cope with the amount of urine she's putting out overnight.

We've talked to her about it, but she maintains that she doesn't wake up for a wee, and sometimes gets very confused because she's wet and can't remember weeing.

How about the Dry Nights pullup thingies? I think a friend used this for her DS who weed too much for ordinary pullups. He was still not dry before Christmas aged 4 1/2 and she was about to resort to bribery. If she doesn't remember weeing, I@m not sure what you can do. I can't remember the statistics but a lot of children aren't dry at night at that age.

I used to reward DS2 for each pair of drypullups in the morning. Never made a fuss over the wetones but praised the dry ones.

I'll have to try some of those, because the Pampers pull-ups just aren't cutting the mustard - she's a big girl for her age and can produce almost as much wee as an adult does, which is probably why the nappies aren't working.

Apparently dh was still in nappies at night time until he was about 5, it's probably hereditary!

I'm not sure you can night-time train, can you? You just have to be able to facilitate it happening when it does. By this I mean, be aware of whether they are wet in the morning because they have peed in their sleep (and for heaven's sake, how do you train someone not to do something in their sleep?) or whether they are waking up and peeing in the morning before you get to them. If it is the latter, then you need to help them be able to get to the bathroom (or a potty in their room, or whatever your solution is) rather than taking the easy option of relieving themselves in their nappy/pull-ups.
I think SD is right, they do actually need to be physically ready. It annoys me when people say "Oh I just did dd at night at the same time that we did day-time training" because there is very little you can actually do - they do it themselves, or rather their body does.

On the subject of lifting them, their is an opinion that says that this is actually counter-productive as what you want the bladder to do is to get used to the idea that it needs to last the night, and by lifting them you are allowing it to empty while they are basically still asleep and not builind up a "resitance" as it were, to the sesation of being full. I think this is probably right. We lifted my ds1 for a while when he was having a lot of accidents but whenever dh was away I left him as it meant he could come into bed with me rather than me changing the sheets! Eventually he was dry on these nights too and we took the plunge and stopped lifting him and he's fine now. Lifting them avoids wet beds but it doesn't train them not to do it.
HTH.

Huggies Pyjama Pants go up to age 15! They're not cheap though.

Ds is 4.5 and still wet at night. He was dry for about 2 mths last summer but I left him in pullups and when he started school nursery started to wet at night again.

Anyway I just put him in a Tesco 6 nappy - they are very absorbent, more than pullups I believe and if she is making no attempt to go to the toilet during the night why not use a nappy? Ds isn't at all concerned about wearing a nappy and they are much cheaper than pullups

bellababe, I agree that you can't do much until they're ready. We let her become dry of her own volition, and I was hoping to do the same with the night-time wetting as well, and if it wasn't for the fact that it upsets dd when she wakes up dripping wet, I probably wouldn't have asked the question - even if I am getting a bit fed up with continually washing sheets!

I see your point about lifting - it does sound as if it's counter-productive as it doesn't help them learn to recognise when they need to wee. Looks like I'm shopping for Pyjama Pants in the morning!

Thanks both.

stripey, she is wearing a nappy at night - it's just not containing the wee! Tescos sounds worth a try - thanks.