Tell me what to do - I am a seething mass of guilt, indecision, illness & selfishness

[KatyMac]

Next weekend (28th) DD is competing in a comp in Blackpool

Originally I was going on the coach Friday 6am and coming home on the coach 7pm Sunday evening (DD & DH will be doing this)

But I have to work Friday so would be travelling up by car (with my mum driving) late on Friday & now the coach isn't coming back until 10 or 11pm (So we might not get home til 5 or 6am)

I start work at 7:30 on Monday morning and was considering getting the train home (6hrs) so I could be sure I was there to work Monday morning

Now this is where the guilt/illness comes in - I have been poorly for weeks this autumn - 5 weeks straight 3 weeks better then another week ill again - I finished my 3rd lot of A-B's yesterday & am back off to the GP tonight expecting more A-Bs.

Would I be awful to say I just can't come so I can get better properly (nice quiet weekend, no 6 hrs journey (2 ways), no major stress etc)

DD would still have her dad, her Nana, my god-mum watching her. DH takes her to comps all the time (they just come back the same day)

& I feel so guilty even suggesting it

Do it. Do it. Do it.

Crikey KM, I remember you had some awful tonsilitis throat thingy didn't you (and that was quite a while ago). You clearly need time to try and recharge your batteries and it's not as if your dd wont have heaps of support people to gee her on.

Stay at home and try and take it easy.

Didn't the tonsilitis thingy follow a tooth issue (or am I getting really confused)?

Yes - that was in the early part of the year when I had throat/ear & tooth problems - I got over that (after weeks) & now I have ear, chest & urine problem

You are not a bad mother.

You are ill.

There is a huge difference

Stay at home, be kind to yourself, you'll make yourself more ill with all that travelling and stress.
Have a relaxing weekend and get better for your family, they will understand.

You need a break. This is a golden opportunity. Your dd has heaps of support. The travelling is NOT going to make you better and lack of sleep will hinder recovery IMO.

It sounds like you really could do with the rest. It doesn't make you a bad mother if you stay at home, just one who will be able to recuperate more quickly.
xx

You won't be any good to her, travelling all that way and just getting iller. Let the rest of the family do the supporting thing, you stay home and try to get some sleep in.

btw, you sound like a brilliant mother for even contemplating doing all that travel after being so ill....

So I am not a selfish cow that wants to sit in the warm, watch crappy TV, drink tea & eat chocolate?

OK my mum & DD are tentatively OK with the idea - I just need to broach the subject with DH

Not selfish, but looking after yourself. Big difference. Sounds like a great opportunity to have a rest.

The worst thing you can do if you are ill is mess about with your sleep imo.

Dh is being surprisingly reasonable about it - apparently he is worried about me

So far everyone I have spoken to irl has been surprisingly supportive - I really thought I was going to get slammed for doing this

KM - i can't believe you thought you would get a load of abuse for this - it is SO CLEARLY the right course of action! stay home stay home stay home - or we WILL slam you

not selfish. Think of it as dad and daughter bonding time...

Yes, don't you dare go!

You can't argue with all these mums, you know!