i've had peppa pig on a loop all day. i have shouted at dd1. i have neglected dd2. and i didnt wash my hair today

[beforesunrise]

i am feeling an utter failure at the mothering business. right now i cannot stand dd1, she is pushing all my buttons and driving me insane. today she refused to nap (she's 2.5) and then proceded to have a monster tantrum at 6.30. she was hysterical and i shouted at her really violently. i couldnt help it. dd2 gets to grab the boob or some sleep whenever she can, and i feel that at 4 months she is already severely shortchanged... she would love some routine, and i cant give it to her. i have given up trying to deny dd1 her peppa bloody pig dvds, and now it's pretty much on all day. the weather sucks, and my hair is greasy.

this is not how i thought motherhood would be. that's not how i thought i would be. am really .

i dont really need answers, just a sympathetic emoticon will do....

I feel your pain am pregnant and dd1 is two and driving me mad.I would be desperate without peppa

Have a nice warm bath and wash your hair. try and have a nice ending to a horrid day.

When mine were tiny I used to bath at night, that way even if I didn't have chance to shower in the morning I didn't feel too bad.

I know where your coming from, I have the toddler monster too in DD2 (2.7) and also her sister who is a nightmare at winding her up she's 4 also have 8wo DD3 so know all what you mean about shortchanging her I feei I short change them all.

Peppa Pig is educational it does get better just do what you can to get by just now

aww we have all been there..maybe too many times
I have a 4.11yr old[who thankfully started school today] a very willfull 2.9yr old and a cheeky monkey of a 20mth old. It is hard and some days..maybe even weeks I wouldnt get by without the TV/dvds...lol

if it makes you feel better my day started with

its time to get up dd
no
get up
no im still tired
get up its a school
not going
get out of bed now please
no
GET UP OR WILL FETCH THE WATER
she got up mummbling and grumbling.

it was a similar thing over eating her breakfast. then she decided it would be fun to roll around the floor in the changing rooms at dancing in nothing but the knickers she had just peed herself in

she was left in the hands of her father as i had a job interview so he was meant to collect her from dancing which of course meant that i had to rush back to th dancing school after my interview to collect a forgotten lunch box. and the day ended with

get you nightie on
dont know where it is
downstairs
no
go and get it
no

put your nightie on then
no
put your nightie on NOW
not tired
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DD STOP ARGUING AND GET YOUR BEDCLOTHES ON

dd sulks but eventually gets dressed for bed and after another half an hour i manage to pursuede her to stay in bed.

Sympathies, I had a similar gap and dd could drive me absolutely potty and then I felt a total failure. I had to really make myself get some time alone with her and work on our relationship - the more quality attention she got the better she behaved but it is so hard when your instinct is to devote yourself to the baby.

Hi beforesunrise

not sure if you want any advice so ignore if do but...

I found with DS2 that I had a real low when he was about 4 months (DS1 was then 2.1)

I found that talking about it with friends really helped

I also found that the more telly we watched the worse DS1 was, but that it becomes a catch 22 the more they watch, they more they forget how to entertain themselves, and the more energy they have

eventually

I got a friend to have DS1 for a day, slept loads then didn't have tv for a week (told DS1 it had broken)

and got back into doing all the craft stuff, going to the park, playgroups etc

I still had days from hell but it did get better, and it does get easier

poor you

thanks everyone. i know things will get easier... eventually... got a feeling they have to get worse before they get better.

this morning was pretty horrid, dd2 couldnt fall asleep and every time she fell asleep (in my arms) dd1 burst in screaming. so i ended up in tears, and that upset dd1, and that in turn upset me even more.... pm was much much better, we went to visit a friend and we were all happier. unfortunately this evening i made the mistake of calling a friend also with 2 under 2 and she just from the off started telling me about how great a routine she is in, how well her dcs sleep, etc etc. happy for her, but it did nothing to make me feel better about my lack of routine and poor sleeping kids!

noonki- much appreciate your tips, and agree completely re the tv. thats why i hate it so much.

thanks guys.. i'll hang in there.