DS, almost 3 freaking out about weeing - what to do?

[Tigerlion]

I have been trying to potty train my DS for the past two weeks. He is happy to sit on the potty and tells me what a big boy he is when he does so. However he hardly ever wees on the potty. He asks to wear pants rather than nappies in the daytime so I think that somewhere he must be ready.
However when it actually comes to weeing or pooing he refuses to go on the potty and freaks out for as long as he can hold it in, running around the house. This sometimes lasts up to half an hour and he seems in absolute agony for holding it in for so long. Then when he finally lets go, he cries and cries and cries. He doesn't want to wear nappies but doesn't want to wee on the potty either. What should I do about it as it upsets me seeing him so frustrated? Most of his friends are out of nappies and he loves observing them on the potty yet doesn't seem to be able to do it himself.
Each time that he is holding it in, he asks to go to my bed, as though he is happy to do it there. I have tried putting the potty on the bed but that does not work either.

i'd put him back in nappies.

Hi tigerlion, the good thing is that he obviously recognises the signs that he needs to go.

I don't think it is uncommon for some children to dislike going on the potty at first. It must seem strange. Have you tried him on the toilet? My DS2 absolutely refused point blank to wee on the potty - I was tearing my hair out, untill I realised he wanted to stand up like daddy!

It may be worth seeing if he will go in the toilet. tbh neither of my boys were keen on the potty, whereas the toilet was fine.

Good luck!

Hi, just wanted to let you know you're not alone. My DS, 3.6, is still doing this. He likes to wear pants but insists on a nappy to wee, and if one isn't available he will just hold it in. The same as your DS, he doesn't mind sitting on the potty unless he actually needs to do something. He's had a couple of times where he hasn't wee'd all day because he's wanted to wear pants, and then when he finally gets his night time nappy on he completely floods it. We haven't let that keep happening because of worrying he might hurt himself, so we gave in and put him back in nappies for a while. We're now trying again, but this time very slowly. He wears pants but he knows if he needs to wee we will give him a nappy, but for the first three days he had to go in the bathroom to have it put on, wee, and have it taken off. That worked fine, so now he has to go in the bathroom and sit on the potty with the nappy on while he wees - he did that no problem today. So far, so good.... Good luck - I'm sure we'll all get there in the end!

Would he wee into the loo standing up if you got him a step to stand on?

I have tried him on the big loo and standing up with the step but he still freaks out. I think it is more that he is in discomfort but just don't know what to do about making him understand that he is wo wee on the potty/ loo

There are kids that don't like going to the toliet because they see their poop and wee as part of themselves and think that they are getting rid of bits of them rather than waste IYSWIM. It really upsets them to think that part of them is in the loo. It does sound silly but it does happen. Have you explained to him why we go to the loo and what the wee and poop really is? You could try turning it into a game, draw a face on a ping pong ball, pop it into the loo and see if he can hit it.

Hi Tigerlion, just wanted to let you know that I am having the same problem with my DD (2.5). It is good to know that you are not alone. WE had a week of trying pants but decided to put her back in nappies as she was getting distressed. She can tell me when she needs a wee, has vry good bladder control, is happy to sit on the toilet, with her toilet seat, but will not actually wee or poo on it. She has never liked the potty. She sits happily for ages, but when she is just about to go she says she wants to get off and starts getting upset. She then either does it on the floor or in her nappy.

I guess patience is the answer with this one. I keep taking her to the toilet with me and explaining about wee and poo but I think it is just going to take time. It is frustrating when you can see that in every other way they seem ready yet they are not happy to do it. We are going to keep her in nappies, let her sit on the loo when she says she needs to , not put pressure on and use a sticker chart. Fingers crossed! lets keep in touch with how we get on. Good luck!

I've heard that with some boys that don't crack it until daddy gets involved. Maybe the two boys could go and water the lawn or something and take it from there?

My DS is doing exactly the same... have any of you who posted on this thread originally had any subsequent success?

Or any new postings welcome!!!

(Reluctant to get Daddy invloved or he will learn to piddle on the seat, not flush, leave seatup and drop towel on floor)

My DS seems happy to do a poo on the potty but does this freaking out withwees.

Is it a boy thing? Is there a solution?

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I considered that - but he did not cry when weeing in night time nappies or nap time pull ups.

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Maybe,...perhaps I ought to take a sample to docs. Is UTI a common thing in kids?

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