Pre proceedings social services

[ForWiseZebra]

Hi everyone,
During half term received a knock on the door from a woman handing leaflets my girls said someone was at the door so i answered, she asked if everything was ok i replied yes anyway she left. 2 days later a knock on my door 2 policeman are at my door sayjng there has been a complaint which they need to investigate as i was scared i asked them to wait outside whilst i called someone for support (girls at home etc), anyway they had to come in and inspect property anyway jts half renovated and was very cluttered this resulted in pics being taken, i was arrested in suspicion of child neglect, anyway they asked if my daughters could stay somewhere else for tjme being so they stayed at my dads so since this happened my parents have said they coukdnt care for the girls anymore whereby social workers contacted me and issued me a section 20 they said as of tonight your girls will be homeless.. so i didnt want that so signed it. Girls in temporary foster care, attending school im on bail never committed an offense in my life, ive told ss ive got a new house lined up theyve viewed it.. ive got keys signed an agreement.. etc so ive been issued a pre proceedings doc detailing everything im absoluetly devastated i just want my girls bk ive spoken with the daughters headteacher he is being very supportive, due to this ive been suspended from woek as the bail conditions are made jn a way i cant do my job i have been informed by duty officer case is closed from their side will be issued with a caution.. transfer to social care its more of a help/support case. I want my girls bk so badly contact is twjce a week 2 x 1.5 hr session had my fjrst one i am in absolute bits. My family (step mum, dad 2 siblings) not checked to see if im ok.. i needed help.... not like this!! My head is all over the place.
Secured a new house its 2 bedroom but im ok as long as girls have their rooms.
Decluttered
Moved some stuff out
Received new tenancy agreement and keys
Daughters school onboard and the headteacher at my place of work is currently onboard.
Seeing girls 2 x a week via contact centre 1.5 hrs each
It hurts knowing they are somewhere else and i want them home..

ive told ss ive got a new house lined up theyve viewed it.. ive got keys signed an agreement.. e

how have you managed this?

what is the head “on board” with?

I suspect ‘very cluttered’ is doing a lot of heavy lifting here… you don’t need to justify to MN, but you do need to recognise the actual problems, all of them. The fact that you’re only allowed very limited supervised contact and that you were arrested for neglect suggests more than just ‘clutter’.

If you’ve been arrested, there’s much more to this than you’re saying - it’s very hard to be charged with child neglect, and removal of children has a very high bar too.

I don’t understand why you’re doing renovations when you’re planning to move.

In any event the best way to get your children back is to work with services, acknowledge what’s happened and look to fix your living circumstances so your children have a safe home.

The police must have had very serious concerns if they arrested you.

Op people don’t have their children removed due to renovations and ‘clutter’. We can’t advise you with half truths

You need to fully cooperate with social workers.

you need to accept full responsibility and stop minimising what has gone on.

Do everything thing you are told to and accept all help and support offered.

You must be fully honest with yourself and with social work.

OP there must be more background than what you have said! Close friend works for child protection and it is very rarely that children are removed from the family!!

Why was the house being renovated? Who was doing it. Do you own the house? You need to work with the authorised and do everything they say and more to be in with a chance of getting your children back. And the police just don’t arrest you for a messy house. It must have been in a terrible state.

I just did an advanced search and there is a MH background and previous DV which may explain the seriousness and the removal.

OP, I hope you get the help you need. I'm guessing the house looked more like hoarding than cluttered and maybe unsafe as opposed to in renovations? Could there also have been any concerns regarding how the girls presented?

If the case is closed that sounds promising, OP. You’ll need to take all the help that’s offered to get some stability back for your children. Really hard to advise much else without knowing the backstory, but good luck.

There must be more to this.

When my DC were small they were temporarily removed due to the state of my house. It was more than cluttered, and they never should have had to live like that. Like my name says, I'm ashamed.
However. I was never arrested. Never charged, DC just couldn't be in the Home until I'd cleared it up. Now there were a lot of lies in the SS reported. But ultimately the house was clean within a week. Repainted in less than a month. DC were returned, and whilst they were still involved for a while, (along with further lies) the main thing is that DC were returned to me. I can pass a DBS check and am cleared to work with children.

But there's no way you were arrested for clutter and renovations.

None of this makes sense, if you’ve got a house that you are renovating why have you “secured” a new house? Why don’t you just tidy the original house? Seems a bit extreme to rent a second property. Bizarre

Op I had a mental health crisis, was drinking too much and couldn’t keep on top of the house, I had social services intervention and my children stayed with their dad temporarily… I worked with social services, sorted the house, stopped drinking and now closed to SS and me and their dad share custody. I knew and recognised my failings but was never arrested and nothing court ordered and things were bad with me. You need to be honest with SS about everything and work together.

Time to change your username then!

To all ive left an abusive relationship 8 years ago from their dad the mess my therapist explained if cleared then it would expose whats underneath. No alcohol, drugs or substance abuse. Just a single mum of 3 trying her hardest for her family with anxiety, ptsd and unresolved trauma.

The house is not going to be renovated further so i found a new house.

Wrong thread

You are not in pre-proceedings with your children removed because your house is cluttered.
You are lying.
Unless you are honest there is absolutely no point in discussing this.

How on earth are you affording all this? You’re not working presumably

Why didn't you go with your children to your parents to look after your children? What are you looking for from this thread? It doesn't sound like you're being very honest and it feels like you're looking for sympathy. It must be very hard to be separated from your children. It doesn't sound as if you have prioritised them or done the work needed to get them back.

Your therapist advised you not to clear any mess in the last 8 years?

??? You left him 8 YEARS ago and the mess from your ex is STILL there? What on Earth does "the mess underneath" mean?

Im ngl your posts read as if you're half drunk writing them. It barely makes sense. Im not one to get down on someone struggling and support women the most and best they can. But this... it is quite clear you are either lying or not giving the full picture. There is not a chance in hell you were arrested for house renovation mess, and in any case you've since backtracked and now said its mess left by their dad from 8 years ago ????

If a woman handing out leaflets was shocked enough by what she saw when you opened the door, that she actually went home and made a call to SS, that's got to be more than a bit of reno work on your house.

We can't help with only half a story OP.

Your therapist sounds like they were explaining, psychologically, what was getting in the way of you sorting your home - ie the mess was a physical representation of the state of your mind. However, your children need a safe, orderly home, and it’s been very far from that if you were arrested and your children removed.