Help - 9 year old dd behaviour

[MissStonor]

Please help me with some ways forward with my 9’year old. Her behaviour over the last few months has been unbearable. She refuses to do any tasks and is so defiant. I have tried behaviour charts, consequences, bribery but she just digs her heels in and becomes aggressive.
she really is a lovely, fun sweet girl but I am struggling

Some examples might be helpful. Is this a recent change in behaviour? Is it worse on any particular day?
Could she be looking for attention ( even if negative) or any changes indicating the start of puberty?
Sounds like you’ve tried a few strategies. Have you tried unpicking and recording her behaviour to see if there’s a pattern? Look at STAR analysis
setting, trigger, action, result.
Is she stressed or anxious and have school staff noticed any changes?
Sorry for all the questions just trying to help you to unpick her recent behaviour.

Thank you for such a thoughtful response. She has always been a bit fiery but this level is new- from starting year 5. She hates school and her teacher and this is probably stressing her out but I do still need her to do the bare minimum at home and I am struggling to find ways to do that. She has lots of friends who come over regularly and she isn’t enrolled in lots of clubs - just one after school and one weekend activity and she loves them both.

If she’s finding school challenging she’s probably holding in her emotions and then is frustrated at home.
Have you had a parents evening this term yet? Is she struggling with the learning or the teacher’s approach? Has there been any falling out with friends?
Could you get together and make a list or timetable of tasks together?
Other things you could try is planned ignoring for low level behaviour and lots of praise for daily tasks.
Try offering choices like do you want to tidy your room before or after tea? Or challenges using music, timers or a direct challenge with you I bet I can pick up more toys than you in one minute etc.