Names for excreta

[Lovage]

Following on from thread on names for female genitalia.

I'm struggling with what to call DS's... well, 'shit' is what I call it, and how DP and I talk about it e.g. 'he did the most enormous shit this morning' or 'has he shat yet?' DS has only just started noticing when he shits and so far he says 'manna' (his word for nappy) or sometimes 'manna oh no' and we say 'do you need a nappy change?' or 'have you filled your nappy?' or similar. But we need a word for the actual stuff. I just can't bring myself to say 'poo' - I know most people do, but it just makes me cringe to hear me say it. Other people saying it to their kids is fine, but it's just not me. But I don't think I can cope with the social disapproval if I teach him to say 'shit'. Anyone got any good alternatives?

Urine is fine, thankfully - we call it 'pee' and I'm happy for him to say that too.

[FrannyandZooey]

fgs do NOT teach him to say shit
please I beg of you
erm
kaka?
or just make something up?

[Seona1973]

it's 'poo' in our house I'm afraid. I remember when I was younger I used to say I had done a 'dirty' but dont call it that now.

[NorthernLurker]

What's wrong with poo? It's a lot better than shit imo. You could go all Alan Clark and call it 'Thompson' I suppose? As in 'had hugely satisfying Thompson this am'

[fryalot]

agree.

not shit.

I think you should try and force yourself to say poo.

If/when he goes to nursery, he will have to ask another adult to help him do this particular function (well, not help with the heaving and pushing, but help with the trouser pulling down and the wiping etc...) and if you make up a name, they won't know what he means...

try and say poo.

we'll help you:

repeat after me:

pool pool pool pool poo

did you manage it?

[Pollyanna]

my sil used to call it bigs!

(prefer poo myself)

[S1ur]

lol

'kay I'll join in, how about bowel movement or excrement or waste or whoopsie or doo doo or sorry got a bit carried away there

actually i knew someone who used to say doo doo and she had a little song she'd sing to her son to erm encourage him...

ahem

ooh ooh doo doo
let's push the doo doo out
ooh ooh doo doo
push push push

and so on.

go with that, go on.

[S1ur]

or go cockney.

two bob bit/top ten hit/brad pit = all shit

or maybe a little variation
shine a light/turkish delight = shite

or even

betty boo/four by two = POO

[IPityTheFool]

I thought this was a baby names thread. I was going to post 'fgs do NOT call you baby Excreta.'

I think you're going to have to accept 'poo'
He will call it that once he's at school anyway.
You will be the embarrassing mum who calls it 'exreta' or 'faeces' or 'stools'

You've wiped it up and now it's time to say it

POO

[bodiddly]

its poo ... or how about a number 2 if you really cant face calling it poo?

[Lovage]

Sigh... I think you're probably right. I'm just going to have to keep practising saying 'poo' until it doesn't make me cringe. None of the alternatives people have suggested sound any better. But good to have explored the possibilities!

IPityTheFool - I'd just come from the Baby Names thread too. Don't you think 'Excreta' would be a pretty name for a girl?!