14 month old in hunger strike because I am trying to reduce breastfeeding

[TheLostMum]

Basically the title. 14 month old, CMPA and soy allergy, never a great eater, only really ate porridge, toast and fruit regularly, on a good day few bites of whatever we are having (always offer him our meals). Past few weeks I am trying to reduce breastfeeding to twice a day, morning and before bed only, as I travel a lot for work and cba with pumping during the day as I have to do for comfort when he has unfettered access (will feed every few hours when allowed). Feel at risk if mastitis when I’m away from him tbh. My first stopped bf herself at 12 months, I was so hoping he would be the same but no such luck. Today taken a firm stance, only let him bf this am and he’s furious and gone a hunger strike today in response, barely eaten anything. Seems otherwise well bar pulling at my top all the time and throwing actual tantrums. Do I hold firm and ride this out? Or give in an go back to unfettered access and hope he turns the corner at some point soon? Already aware will be in for a rough night as he will be so hungry. At a loss, hoping less bf will increase his appetite but he is playing me atm and he is very stubborn!!!!

What are you offering him instead? If hes not eating in general you may need a speech and language referral. Any ties or sensory issues?

Are you offering milk in a different form in day?

Try and get out the mindset of hes "playing you".

Is he drinking milk or water from a bottle/sippy cup?

He isn't old enough to play you.

Yeah I don’t think a 14 month old is trying to ‘play you’. He’s hungry. Can you feed him some goat milk as if he takes a bottle? I wouldn’t take a hard stance on a 14 month old - some babies don’t eat proper meals until toddlerhood

I understand why you want to reduce feeds (see my username), but at that age he can’t ’play’ you or be stubborn. Breastfeeding is so much more than nutrition - it’s comfort, connection, and even pain relief. You need to build on providing those elements in different ways, rather than just supplementing/swapping with another milk or food.

You could try a comforter, a special book, and looking at when he tries to feed (eg if overwhelmed, tired, teething). But at 14 months, he’s not able to understand why you are all of a sudden refusing feeds. He will be confused. One option is to try and reduce how long he feeds for, and offering distractions before and during the feed. Remember that up until 1yr old - weeks ago - milk is supposed to be the main source of nutrition for a child. Any change needs to be gradual.

He's not on a hunger strike, he's confused and frustrated because he's trying to communicate what he wants and it's not working.

If it's only been one day I'd stick with it. He will get there. Offer lots of his favourite foods, regularly (and some new ones). Offer lots of cuddles/comfort and warm milk in a cup. Be consistent.