2 year old struggling with nursery room transition

[Hydrangea60]

My son always loved nursery and settled fine when he started last year at 11 months, but he moved to the 2-3 year olds room last week when he turned 2 and seems to hate it 😕

He screams at every drop off when this was never a problem before, isn't eating much when he's there and when we ask him now if he likes nursery he says 'no'.

The staff say he's fine when he's there but he seems quiet and subdued when we pick him up. He's quite shy and sensitive so I wonder if the busier/noisier environment is all too much for him. I don't know what to do, as waiting lists for another setting or childminder are huge where we are and it's likely we wouldn't get a place until next September at the earliest (and there's no guarantee he'd like it there either). We only send him 3 days a week at the moment and can't afford to drop our hours at work anymore than this (we both work 4 days a week). We have no grandparents or other family able to help either.

Will this get better or is it a sign it's the wrong nursery for him?

My DD went through the same thing at the move to 3 year olds. She had a very good friend who wasn't moving up for 3 months which we believe was a factor as, as soon as her mate moved up, she settled completely.

We spoke to nursery loads, they said she was shy but happy there but we had tantrums every day she had to go to nursery for several months.

I do think part of it is age - as they turn 3 they are becoming more aware of safety etc and struggling with emotional upheaval. My DD's friend not being there was a symptom of that.

She did settle eventually but it was a hard couple of months.

Speak to nursery about ways you can manage his emotions and maybe see if you can set up a play date with a nursery friend or two outside of nursery?

Good luck!

Thank you, I'm sorry you went through this too but glad to hear it got easier. That's reassuring to know.

He finished the end of his second week in the new room yesterday and won't be back in now until Tuesday. I think if it's still the same by this time next week we'll ask for a meeting with his key worker to see what else can be done and we'll see if play dates might be an option too (due to his age I'm not sure if he has any particular children he's close to).

He did have a very close bond with a couple of staff in the baby room though so this may also be part of the issue.

Yeah the staff can be an issue too as they miss them. Good luck!