How do you deal with competitive parenting and constant milestone comparisons?

[KellyK2026]

How do you deal with the baby Olympics?

For context, I have an almost 2 year old son. I have a nephew who is about 8 months older than him and, at every opportunity, his parents, especially my sister-in-law will say things like ‘he [her son] just so smart’, ‘I’ve never seen anything like how smart he is, he’s just sooo intelligent’, or ‘he really is a genius’. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a clever boy and I love him, but I’m really not understanding what she’s talking about and nor do my family who look after both children and haven’t noticed a difference in development. My son is hitting all his milestones, speaks in 4-5 word sentences and is bilingual (he’s a chatterbox), but I’m under absolutely no illusion and I know kids develop at their own pace and will prioritise different skills at different times. And it would never occur to me to say that I think he’s a ‘genius’, especially in front of parents and their children. As a first time parent I’m finding it utterly bizarre why some parents do things like this? Anyone have any advice on how to deal with baby olympics?

'That's nice' and change the subject.

She's just embarrassing herself.

Not something I encountered thankfully
but I guess I’d just smile patronisingly and nod

Don’t worry about it. Seriously.

She sounds like a loving mum? What’s the issue with her saying how amazing and clever she thinks her baby is? She made and birthed him, and she’s in awe of how he’s developing. She doesn’t seem to be slagging other babies off 😅

It's been many years since I've been there but I agree with @IStillHearTheWaves, a simple 'that's nice' and move on.

Oh absolutely and I think my son is smart, I guess I think talking about how much cleverer you think your child is compared to other children whilst other parents and children are present is a bit cringe. Of course all parents think their children are gorgeous and clever, but that to me is next level.

How often do you get together with them?

Fairly often, but even when I’m not there other relatives have commented on how often it’s said and they are getting tired of it. When my son was learning to walk they laughed every time he fell over and then proceeded to tell me how advanced their son was. I do think it’s comical in a sense, but I also don’t think it’s fair on my son and other children in the family to hear her go on and on about how her child is the special one. I also don’t think it’ll do her son any favours in the long run…

Smile and ignore

This is your husband’s sibling? He’s not close enough to lightheartedly say something?

What is your relationship otherwise like with your SIL?