Is this too much for a childs birthday??

[Zaza2020]

My ds is about to turn 7 next month he has been given his big gift early a couple of months ago, as he really needed a new bike as he uses it for school run and a group he attends - the bike was a top of the range bike and cost a lot of money. We only have one son and he is really into biking so we were happy to do that. He is also having a biking party with ten friends led by an instructor so another pricey thing, first time we have done anything like this and most certainly wont be a yearly occurance. Hubby and i have also bought quite a few gifts as bike was so long ago now and dont want him waking on birthday to nothing, for context we have a huge family and stopped buying for neices and nephews unless invited to parties after we got into double figure.So my son only gets from us and my parents who are the only surviving grandparents and that is normally money for something practical like winter coat, boots etc. But we have an estranged relative who sends a £200 gift card for a toy shop each birthday and christmas.
Which is very generous, i have no contact with this sibling to say could you please send a voucher for a clothes shop ect. But i feel this year he has got a lot and no doubt will have presents from the children attending his party too. I was thinking of holding onto the smiths voucher and using it for a few bits for christmas. Am i being mean? Whats everyones thoughts...

I wouldn't even count the bike as a birthday present unless you were struggling for money . The bike is a form of transport . I'd get him presents but not expensive ones . I had an October baby and bought things suitable for the summer at the appropriate time . No point getting your paddling pool in November .

It is his gift card so he should have it. I’m of the opinion that children should be spoilt and made to feel special on their birthday and at Christmas so a trip on or near his birthday to spend his smyths card seems like another fun day out for him celebrating his birthday. Christmas is a long way off for a child and there’s always something they want and I know this from experience as I have 3 boys myself!! Currently Lego is massively popular with my boys 😊

No one really can say except you, it depends on your circumstances how many gifts you want him to have.

My DD is also an only child and has so many aunties, uncles, cousins etc so she gets masses of presents.

On her birthday I put half of her presents in a storage box away somewhere safe and she gets one gift every week or two. Otherwise she gets overwhelmed and half the toys don't get played with at all and it seems like such a waste.

My upbringing could not have been more opposite, so I want her to appreciate everything she gets and understand she is very lucky.

If probably save the voucher till Christmas or until you need another big spend

Who cares what others think?

Your DS. Do whatever the heck YOU want to do for him and don’t be swayed by anyone

The voucher belongs to DS and was given for his birthday so that’s when he should get it. He should then be free to buy whatever he likes with it and shouldn’t forget to write the very generous relative a thank you card telling them what he’s chosen. You can’t seriously be thinking of taking it away, when it doesn’t belong to you, then using it at Christmas (to pass the gifts of as from you?!). It’s an awful, mean idea and I bet your relative wouldn’t be happy if they knew.

The bike is also irrelevant- if it was bought months ago you can’t connect it to his birthday.

But he’s getting what sounds a brilliant party and quite a few gifts from you so all sounds fine. Not sure what the issue is? But if you think it’s too much then instead of ‘stealing’ his voucher I’d stash some of what you’ve bought away from Christmas.

If he’s only getting a few things on the day then I’d let him have the card but suggest he saves it for a special shopping trip or when he wants something special (it’s a good lesson for kids to learn anyway).
He’s got presents from you, and he’ll get things from the kids who are attending his party so I’d encourage him not to spend it straight away. Just tell him ‘Auntie Pam has sent you a gift card, we’ll look after it and you can spend it when there’s something you really want’

i disagree that you shouldn't have any influence over when your DS benefits from the voucher - i don't hear any of those people saying that you shouldn't have got the bike early.

With a DC birthday close to Christmas I don't give nearly so much then and that allows me to balance it out in the summer by when he needs new/different stuff anyway. That may change as he gets older.

I agree with having some things to open on his birthday. Can you use some of the toy gift card now?

That’s fine, though if it was me personally, I’d be sending those gift cards back. Via someone else in the family, if necessary. I have close relatives who we are NC with. They don’t send anything anymore because they no longer know where we live, but before that, they were returned or sent to charity shops. If someone is not okay enough to have in our lives, we definitely won’t be accepting gifts from them. It feels manipulative.

I would disregard the bike as a birthday gift. It was given so long ago a 7 year old won’t associate that with his birthday. It sounds like he has plenty of other gifts and celebrations arranged for the day. He’s a lucky boy and I’m sure he feels loved!

The gift card - it is his, not yours, and he should be able to spend it freely as he wishes. It’s not for you to decide that he needs clothes instead of toys, that’s not how gifts work. You don’t have a relationship with this sibling but they obviously care enough for your child to still send a generous and thoughtful gift for birthdays and Christmas. No doubt, as your son grows older, sibling will change the gift card from a toy shop to something else age-appropriate.

I send a generous gift card to the children in my family I don't see as often as I would like - or rather, I send it to their parents with a note saying "feel free to put this towards one of little Johnny's presents!"

If I was your relative, I would be completely happy to hear you got them a big lego set or whatever, and a smaller voucher or token gift from "Auntie Mrs Claus." So, unless your estranged person (and I'm sorry, that's hard), as said explicitly that they want little Johnny to spend the voucher themselves, then that's one possible way of handling it.

Wow!! stealing his gift card to pass of as presents from me!! Gosh some people love to be unkind. Santa gives the gifts at this point so i dont get the credit for them and we already know what he wants and it doesnt come from smyths.
Yes i agree with bike being a while ago hence the extra gifts.
Thanks for all the kind replies - i think i might encourage him to put it aside for a few weeks and then spend it once the birthday hype has calmed and the other gifts have been played with, as we are bursting at the seams with toys.