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Parenting

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5 week old / sleep deprivation & PND

5 replies

Whatisgoingoff2024 · 05/09/2026 15:08

I’ve never felt sleep deprivation like it and don’t know how I’m functioning. I don’t know how I’m going to carry on and not sure I want to.

Just been diagnosed with PND and feel like I’m failing. This is my second DC and I never experienced these feelings with my first.

Sleep is a nightmare, day time and night time. She will have her first successful stretch of sleep 8pm-12, then we are up 2 hours feeding/burping trying to resettle her again. Then there’s 1 hour sleep before she wakes again. I don’t know where I’m going wrong but I’m struggling to bond with her. She seems so frantic during night feeds and winding.

She doesn’t like to lie on my chest, she pushes her feet down to stand up and flaps her head from side to side. She cries when being held over the shoulder and any other attempts to wind.

She’s constantly squirming/ moving around, it’s the same when she’s content and I’m trying to cuddle her/contact nap. I feel like she’s rejecting me.

It takes her hours to fall asleep in the day. The moment we get home from a walk in the push chair she wakes up. She fights sleep when I rock/swaddle her and I keep getting so tearful like it’s all my fault. I never feel like I relax or switch off even in the day time as she just feels such hard work.

She’s formula fed. There is some question over a tongue tie as she’s constantly clicking on the bottle but the HV said they wouldn’t do anything about it anyway. We trialled CMPA formula for 2 weeks with no success (based on her being inconsolable for the first 3 weeks of life).

Im stuck in a haze that I feel like I’ll never get out of. My husband is supportive and hands on but he’s also knackered and we are doing our best to make everything normal for our 3 year old.

My DS was a complete breeze and actually slept.

Please tell me it gets better, I feel like I’ve ruined everything.

OP posts:
RichmondMumof2 · 05/09/2026 15:14

so sorry you are having a difficult time.

Well done for writing it down ❤️.

You will get through this. See if you can get an hour or two break one day and you will feel revived.

This is the most difficult time and things will improve.

Sesame2011 · 05/09/2026 15:17

Im so sorry you are going through this. Do you have anyone who can take your older child for some time away from house or an overnight? Anyone that can come round to actually help with the baby while you rest?

I found my baby was really struggling with trapped wind, we were constantly burping her and trying all the techniques on tik tok to get the burps and farts out. As well was using infacol/gripe water. It was hard.

You are in the pits of hell right now but it really will get better 💐

WhatNextImScared · 05/09/2026 15:21

Look into cow’s milk protein allergy. Make sure they haven’t just given you a hydrolysed formula. You need a totally dairy and soya free one. Push for it.

I’m sorry you’re going through this. I did too. It will end. Until then, your only job is to just get through the next hour. How much support do you have other than your DP? X

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Madcats · 05/09/2026 15:39

You poor thing!

Did you have a premature/difficult birth? I don’t know whether it is still a “thing” but my surgery used to refer a cohort of kids to the local cranial osteopath. It might be worth looking for one if you can find one, even if it is just to reassure you that your baby is fine.

FWIW, all the difficult babies I remember have been lovely as teenagers.

Whatisgoingoff2024 · 05/09/2026 16:04

The majority of wider support are working full time through the week so there is no rest bite.

My 3 year old is at nursery 3 days a week but the sad part is that I miss him when he goes, he makes me feel less alone.

My mum offered to have her today for a few hours so I can spend some time with my 3YO. The awful part is that I don’t want to go and fetch her as I feel so anxious about what is to come.

Re osteopath, I have considered this and willing to give anything a try. She was born via planned c section at 39 weeks if that makes any difference? I’m not aware of any difficulties, other than she hasn’t stopped crying since. I remember the surgeon commenting that she was crying before even being lifted out.

Re completely free dairy, is this worth pursuing based on what I’ve described?

Im convinced there is something wrong with her.

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