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Parenting

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Is there a super nanny to reach out for help.

1 reply

User95273 · 28/08/2026 14:16

Asking on behalf of a friend: is there a suppernanny of sorts that could come and give tips as to what to do?

The situation is that there are four young kids with their mum and dad. Kids are manageable and behave well with mum. Normal kids behaviour.

But when dad arrives home, the oldest son age 8 begins to swear, and shout and mum, flagrantly flaunt the rules he knows well. Is hostile to siblings. To a point where mum doesn’t feel she can be in the kitchen or living room. She has to be in the bedroom with one or two of the youngest and lock the door not be harassed, verbally abused and shouted at.

She’s considering divorce but doesn’t want to do it. Which is why she’s asking if there are Suppernany /problem solving Nannies.

It is clear to me as her friend that there is inconsistent parenting. Boundaries are not asserted and bad behaviour is rewarded by dad without realising it.
Dad is a good man, but seems to be out of his depth when it comes to controlling his son’s behaviour.

The 8yo is still young and this behaviour can be corrected. He is capable and has demonstrated repeatedly his caring and helpful side. But now that dad’s home more often, the circumstances are more challenging.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
24Dogcuddler · 28/08/2026 17:15

Your friend can be “Super Nanny”

Make clear what the rules are and display them.
Share, take turns, kind hands and feet, listen to adults. No shouting or swearing.
Some planned ignoring for low level behaviours. Positive praise and rewards for expected behaviour. Clear consistent consequences for negative behaviours.

Look at STAR analysis setting trigger action result
The DS should be in the bedroom if he shouts and swears if the Mum and siblings are retreating out of his way, the result is that he feels in charge and gets dad to himself.
Dad needs to be on board with any expectations and consequences.

DS can learn about emotional regulation and be taught strategies to calm himself when he feels angry and wants to shout and swear. He can try deep breathing, clenching and unclenching fists counting to ten slowly in his head.
If he goes to his room and waits calmly for Dad to arrive he could have some time with him. ATM he’s getting this by driving the rest of the family away.

Do any of the DC get time away from siblings with one or both parents, Grandparents or relatives. Maybe eldest DS needs this.

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