Where am I going wrong with my 15 month olds schedule?

[Hannah2025]

Please can somebody tell me where I’m going wrong with my son’s schedule? He will be 15 months old in 4 days time. His sleep is extremely up and down (but more so down). A good night is a couple of wakes earlier in the night before midnight. A bad night is multiple wakes through the whole night lasting hours.

6/6:30 wake (this varies each day but this is the average time)
8:00 breakfast (cereal with milk, peanut butter toast and berries)
9:00 out and about to the park/shops
11:00 back for milk and nap
11:30 down for naptime after 240ml of milk* *(he naps on average 90min but again this varies. Sometimes he will only nap 30/40 mins and refuses to go back down)
13:30 lunch (marmite sandwich, avocado, tomatoes, fruit, cheese)
Afternoon we either pop out again or play in the garden/indoors
17:00 dinner (either pesto pasta or bolognese and mash he’s very fussy)
17:30 bath time
18:00 wind down for bed
18:45/19:00 bedtime

We’ve tried earlier bedtimes/later bedtimes nothing seems to work.

Where am I going wrong?! I feel like I’m sending myself insane. I’m totally on the verge of getting a sleep consultant, but I keep holding on hope that he will grow out of it :(

More hydration through the day and more protein and fats and fibre would be worth looking at too

You’re not doing anything wrong at all. It sounds like a lovely schedule and some great meals.

Every baby has a different temperament. For some, this means waking frequently, if not hourly, through the night. It’s really tough.

Your options are:

• Ride it out until it naturally comes to an end. (This is what we did. We went from 6-10 wake ups a night to sleeping through for an eight hour block over the course of a few days. It was wild!)
• Follow the advice of gentle/holistic sleep consultants such as Lucy Bagwell, Lyndsey Hookway, It takes a Village etc. They will suggest some strategies and things to try that don’t involve any form of cry it out or unresponsive techniques.
• Do cry it out, Ferber, chair method, or unresponsive techniques. (But please don’t do this - we know so much more now about how these can be harmful.)

Also - another vote in favour of a floor bed!

Noticed you said 'lots of snacks', well that's your issue. He isn't hungry enough when it is a mealtime. I'd cut the lunchtime milk, and limit snacks significantly.

I'd try and get his whole schedule later - that might mean a few days of no pushchair in the morning to get to a decent nap time, then try moving bedtime a bit later each day. Then family dinner should be more feasible

Floor bed has meant that my toddler has been able to spend the whole night in her room but I join her. Rather than moving rooms/beds.

But he can wake at 6 and not breakfast til 8am that’s mad?

Could you try a later tea time too. 5pm until 8am is a long time without food and they might simply be hungry.

Is there a reason too why bath time is so early a whole 1.5 hours before bed. Young kids really don't need long extended bed time routines or an hour winding down before bed. Active time and time to burn energy off after tea and then a quick bath, story, bed might help too.

I just let mine go to sleep when she wanted, still a night owl as an adult, if they are not tired they won't sleep. She also refused naps very early. Not all babies conform with expectations.

Molars are deffo in full swing, all 4 have erupted now. We did calpol for a while but I was too worried to carry on with it and stopped when recommended. Now he just has it when it’s really needed but it’s such an ongoing thing!

I do think this could be it. Maybe he just doesn’t need as much. It’s really hard to know what’s best as most children I know his age are sleeping really well/on 2 naps still, and I feel a lot of the time like he just isn’t getting enough! But maybe he is just a child that doesn’t need as much

You're probably not doing anything wrong. My toddler woke up multiple times a night until 18 months and then suddenly started sleeping through most of the time or just waking once. I think most kids will do it when they are ready.
Definitely try a floor bed or moving to your bed when he wakes up, it normally helps you all get a bit more rest. I was afraid of doing this as I thought it would lead to co sleeping all the time but it hasn't for us.

I am not complaining about the split nights, it’s the nights that involve multiple wakes lasting hours (which are most nights) that I’m listing as bad nights - which I stand by it, I believe they are! It doesn’t take him long to fall asleep at all. He drinks his milk and he falls asleep after whilst chilling out he’s always very calm before bed, then he’s usually okay for the first few hours. He might wake up during the first few hours but will usually put himself back to sleep. It’s after around 22:00 things get ropey.

Thank you so much for this. The most helpful reply so far! <3

This is some food for thought (literally) thank you! I have been thinking about cutting his afternoon milk out. I’ll give this a go.

This was an average day, not every day is the same. I mentioned he wakes between 6-6:30. He will have it around 7:30 if he wakes earlier/8:00 if he wakes later. You might think it’s mad, but that’s just how he is even if it’s offered to him! He used to have a bottle as soon as he woke but we dropped it as he lost interest too.

You're not doing anything wrong. Don't worry about having a strict schedule or "sleep regressions". Children go through changes and stages and that's completely normal. He hasn't "regressed".

I understand why people don't want to co-sleep but it'll probably help if you do (safely obviously).

We do currently co sleep pretty much every night after a certain time! It really has helped me keep sane. Best decision we made! I would love our room back and to stop getting kicked in the head every night…but for this chapter it’s the only thing getting us any sleep!

Why is it mad? My 18 mo is the same. (Usually) not hungry when she wakes up. She'll ask for breakfast after playing/reading for an hour or so.

You can hide eggs and cottage cheese in a lot of other foods - banana and cottage cheese pancakes made with eggs for instance.

The evening bath seems to be set in stone for a lot of people but my DD was naturally so hot and found a bath exciting that it would wreck the first few hours of sleep if we did a bath before bed. We shifted to a morning bath and things improved so drastically.

Basically don't be worried about shuffling about with factors that you think have to be a certain way, do what works for your DC.

Thanks everyone for your feedback. Last night was another stressful one. He had a good day, super happy, ate plenty and had a great nap (12:00-14:00). Went down for bed at 19:00 then woke crying at 19:30. Tried everything to get him back down but at 20:30 he was still crying and pointing to the door so we gave up and let him come downstairs. He was super happy and just playing until 22:00. Really not ideal, but he would not sleep for anything. He finally slept at 22:00 but woke at 12:30 and again at 1:30 and again at 6:00.

We’ve decided to continue with co sleeping for now whilst we start the process of getting a floor bed. It gives me hope that others DC slept better from 18 months. I hope we get there one day!