Nursery at 9 months

[AmberUser]

I'm ftm, returning to work in January 4 days a week. It's just really hit me that I'm going from having him all to myself to sending him to nursery 4 days a week. I work long hours, often evenings and weekends. Most of my colleagues are parents, so I know it can be done, but the thought makes me sick. Ds is 5 months now, really bright and engaged, and he loves meeting new people and babies already. But 9 months seems so young to spend so much time away. Did anyone else have babies in (almost) full time nursery before they were 1?

Loads of people do.
Loads of people can't afford to take a full 12 months off.

When mine were little, we only had 3 months maternity leave. Our dc were all fine.
It might help you to get used to being away from your child for increasing lengths of time before you start work. Perhaps leave him with your dh and go out for the day somewhere, or maybe start by leaving him with a sitter or a family member for a couple of hours and go and do something with your dh, or meet a friend for lunch or something.

I had to go back to work full time when mine were 7 months. I did have a nanny which is different but I did miss them a hell of a lot. But you get used to it. The biggest challenge was actually working while being extremely sleep deprived.

I had to do it twice.
first time - DD hated it I felt awful but she adapted and learned so much

second time - DS loved it and thrives he hops and skips into nursery.

it’s so tough, OP, and in my eyes it’s wrong how we can’t stay home for a couple of years with financial support… but we can’t.
it will be good for baby so try not to worry. That being said, I get it and I have been there and soon you’ll see how great it is for him. I’m sorry you’re finding it hard, you’re right too. 🫂 hugs

My first was 6 months old, my second 4.5 months and I was full time and a single parent. They were both fine and loved their nursery. It nearly broke me though! I wish I could have had the experience of motherhood I’d hoped for but sadly it all fell apart! We are super close though and they both say how empowering it was to have a Mum in a very senior role who juggled it all. It broke my heart at times, leaving them but I was lucky as the nursery is on site at my work and I’d often see them during the day!
I know how awful it is to have no choice- such a hard situation for you.

Can you do shared parental leave with your partner (if you have any mat leave left) so you can send your child a month or two later?

@Nighttimeistherightime I wish I could have had the experience of motherhood I’d hoped for

I really feel this too, so much. You're not alone, OP.

Yep. The main thing is to be organised. Do as much the night before.

I had more standard hours and yes prepare for little sleep