Stop at one child or try for another... so confused!

[Lilypie]

I've been over and over this in my head for so long, I need Mumsnet advice!!

My beautiful DD is three years old and is just starting to ask about brothers and sisters.
We had always planned to have two children but when I started a business 2.5 years ago we didn't expect it to take off as well or as quickly which has left me with very little time and little options with stopping work / taking maternity leave etc as I'm a one-man-band.

When we didn't have another child straight away we stopped talking about it but I kind of feel now that we must make a decision.
I'm so torn; the idea of leaving dd an only child, of never experiencing pregnancy or watching a baby grow again breaks my heart... but... the idea of going through morning sickness, nappies, weaning and sleepless nights again makes me break out in a cold sweat!!

Is there anyone out there with only one child who can advise me?

Anyone with two kids who had not planned on the second?

I'm so happy with our lives and our little family as it is but I feel I owe it to dd to give her a brother or sister...

So confused!!

i think it really comes down to you and your DH.

I have a DS and would love more children, but my DH is dead set against it, so it's something I have to deal with.

Either way, it'll be fine, I am sure... just comes down to your heart of hearts....

DH is as confused as I am!!

I could have written your post Lilypie (apart from the successful business bit ). I'd add a terrible fear of labour. Plus I could have problems again ttc, which I don't know if I could deal with once I'd made the decision to try. I don't know how we'll ever decide other than just seeing what happens (except that you have to play the lottery to win IYKWIM ).

my second was similarly a major decision for me, but absolutely has added hugely to our family. whatever you decide will be fine and you sound like a lovely happy family as you are so uhm i don't know what to say. except that i don't think you'd regret no 2.

Don't do it for your dd, she isn't the one paying the mortgage!
Leave it at one if you are happy with that. Thw world is overpopulated after all

Obviously they're advantages/disadvantages to both situations. I have a feeling that siblings become really important the older you get. But there was a nice thread in praise of only children somewhere I'll try and find it for you... here you go - I use to read it whilst mulling over the whole do we try for a second debate in my head.

Now (even though the economics doon't work out at all!!) we were lucky enough to have a dd a few weeks before ds started school last year - I know these thing vary from baby to baby but for us and for many others I'm sure everything's much easier 2nd time around and honestly for us the much bigger upheaval/life change has been Ds going to school.

Good luck whichever way you choose.