Have I broken something with toddler?

[CaffeinatedLondoner]

I have a 16 month old, a dog, and a husband (is it weird that I listed them in that order?). I work, I probably do 70% of the housework. I still BF because DD still wants to. I/we have no family nearby so DD goes to nursery whilst we work but everything else is on us. Recently I've noticed that I'm not just touched out, I'm...mentally absent? Over the past few months, I feel like I don't have the capacity to be present with DH, DD...or even DDog (!) I picked up my DD from nursery today and she didn't rush towards me as she usually does. She kind of toddled around and then went back to the playroom. I've devastated and feel like I've broken something between us, but similarly I'm so exhausted. I don't know what I want/need from putting this out here, I guess just similar experiences? Stories of it getting better?

You simply can’t be totally switched on and engaged for every moment of your LO’s life, please don’t be too hard on yourself. It sounds as though she enjoys Nursery and had a strong enough bond with you that she feels safe toddling off.

If you’re feeling touched out I wonder if you would benefit from some gentle night weaning?

Some days my toddler doesn't want to leave nursery because they are having too much fun. I don't take it as a reflection on my parenting.

It definitely sounds like you are massively overthinking. It sounds like something I'd panic about when I'm not feeling great mentally and realise how silly I was being once I feel better. I guarantee your toddler and your bond are totally fine, you are projecting because you are burnt out. Just focus on getting yourself back to a good place. Hope you feel better soon!

Weaning off bf is not the answer. Dh doing more than 30% of the housework is the answer.

Edit - not that there's a "problem" with your dd toddling around at pickup! That's a lovely calm moment that proves she's happy.

I’m sure you haven’t broken anything with your toddler the one who sounds broken is you.

I had similar at the end of May where I was absolutely ground down. In my case I’m ashamed to say it came out as irritation. Everything they did bothered me and I’m sorry to say I just wanted them to shut up. I hated my son talking to me, hated my daughter wanting to be picked up. I was properly burnt out.

Things still aren’t great but they are better and I don’t have that anger and resentment now.