How to handle 8yos doing something really naughty

[JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff]

My 8yo twins are high energy but essentially good kids. BoyTwin especially is responsible and sensible. GirlTwin can be cheeky but basically, they can both be trusted to go to bed on time, go for a short walk on their own, make a simple dinner with adult supervision.

So I was really shocked today when I heard them giggling together in the garage, put my head round the door to look - and found they had climbed and got a screwdriver and were repeatedly stabbing it into the side of an old box of books we have in there.

Some of the books are too damaged to read again. Several are presents I bought DH years back so have some sentimental value.

I am honestly shocked. I gave them a massive telling off and asked them to do a chore taking care of our house (weeding). They will not be able to buy a cake at the school bake sale on Tues, and they have lost any screen time for a week, and will have early bedtimes for 1w.

I am really sad. Our kids do silly or daft things but never something deliberately destroying someone else's property.

Would you feel the same? How would you handle it?

Honestly @SalmonOnFinnCrisp thanks (really) but I am generally comfortable with my parenting risk assessments. They are allowed to be in the kitchen on their own for short periods, where in theory they could get out a knife and do whatever. The point is, I trust them not to.

Generally over 12y and 3 kids, that's been justified. Today it wasn't, first time.

I also think it is really not unusual. E.g. my kids are allowed to come downstairs early and look at a BBC kids' cartoon and make themselves some cereal. Without an adult. I think that is really really normal. But yes technically, they are alone in a room that has knives in it.

It is hard for a child of 8 to grasp the sentimental value of such things to an adult. They know now and will be sad to have caused you hurt. That and the weeding is enough.

The severity of your punishments does not reflect the severity of the crime but rather that of your hurt. It is worth considering whether that is entirely fair on them as they probably were not aware of that. One punishment for one "crime" is enough.

They need to understand. Destroying things is cruelty.

How did they destroy £100s worth of books to the point they’re unreadable with a screwdriver through a cardboard box?

You’ve gone overboard with the punishments. You’re hurt by what they’ve done so you’re now lashing out at them rather than showing them the effect of their behaviour and dishing out one meaningful consequence.

Ah okay I get you re: the knives...

Mine are younger but its the same thing on a smaller scale i guess
E.g. I know i can let my 4 yr old go to the bathroom solo and she isnt going to start putting shampoo / her yoto / clothes/whatever Into the toilet...

I also disagree its hard for children to grasp sentimentality / importance of items.
My 4 yo 100% has "special things" and if something happened to them she'd be sad.
Equally a necklace of mine broke while I was playing and she was upset she had "broken my special treasure" and was very happy when it was repaired.
The twins were specifically told there were valuable books in the box.

At 7 I drew all over my grandparents' kitchen wall, I just walked past with a crayon in my hand and I'd drawn a massive flower before I even realised what I'd done!

At about 8 or 9 I purposely damaged a load of my mum's ceramic work in her studio - fuck knows why, I was giggling with a friend doing it,I knew that was naughty but still did it. Didn't do it again ! 😱

Kids do random naughty shit.

I think you handled it well.

There's no harm at all in getting angry and letting your children see that their poor choices have caused your anger. Laughing when caught is very disrespectful behaviour and needs to be punished.

Stick to your guns and don't allow anyone to talk you out of your decision.