Should I buy my daughter a therian mask and tail?

[pombearmum]

Hi there.

my daughter who is nearly 11 has recently declared that she is a therian. She believes she is half human half cat in fact she’s even got a name for her cat self. Luna. She is so desperate to wear a mask and tail. I really don’t mind but she recently did and was horribly ridiculed by some teenagers. Who shouted at her in the park. She said she didn’t care because you shouldn’t pick on peoples beliefs.

she’s asked me for a new mask and tail for her birthday. I don’t know if I’m being a bad parent buying it for her or a bad parent trying to steer her away from it. Am I opening her up to being massively bullied? She can be whoever she wants to be in front of me and in my opinion there’s far worse things she could do or be then wearing a mask. But the outside world isn’t as supportive.

is anyone else’s child also like mine and how do you deal with the whole not being sure what’s right or wrong thing? Advice would be great please. Sometimes I just don’t know what’s best.

AI gets it wrong again. It's a prevalent idea but it's bullshit. As an autistic person I've analysed all of that and it's laughable. All of those things don't translate as or naturally lead to thinking you ARE an animal - or the other sex, or anything you're clearly not. Other influences at play, not autism!

No

Sadly, this stuff is being socially engineered. You can just magically switch and BE whatever you want to now! 'I am who I say I am' is being made into nursery rhymes for tiny children. And everyone had better jump and 'respect' every identity whim - or else! Already some schools are fully indulging the I'm a Cat stuff and all the rest of it. And far too many people take it seriously, because, I'm sorry - they're thick.

Yes it is. What is it you're having a problem with?

A production of Cats maybe.

This reminded me of another thread: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5364511-dds-friend-is-therian?page=1

I don't know how helpful it would be for you, but maybe worth a look.

Personally I'd let her make a fool of herself until she grows out it. Obviously her beliefs are bonkers, but I have some respect for an 11 year old who is willing to risk public ridicule in order to dress up as a cat. Does she have many IRL friends?

I don't think being considered to be an adult at 11 is somthing to be proud of, my dd is 11 and I would never consider her a grown up, because she's 11

Under no circumstance should you entertain this bullshit.

😂

No don’t let her. It leads to really disturbing behaviour. Stop her online activity and check out what she has been accessing. Attend some Genspect parent meetings to learn more about this

When I was a kid, I wanted to be Kevin Keegan. It doesn't mean I was Kevin Keegan, though.

Cats don’t use phones. Take it away. Then stop pandering to this nonsense and parent her.

I’d love to know how/where she got her existing mask and tail from at 10 years old.

I have a child same age and she has no idea about this information.

How has your daughter come across this info?

My DD spends her free time at various clubs (a balance of social, sport and instrument) and is currently away on a camping trip with one of her groups with no tech allowed which I fuly support.

She has plenty of chill time at home every day and her options are drawing, reading, ipad, ps5, nintendo switch, netflix/disney or the nearby play park. She also has had a phone for 1 year to practice for high school.

Everything has parental controls. I have only allowed youtube for the past 6 months or so as I think it is total mindrot for kids and I used chatgpt to find appropriate family friendy and no woke channels for gaming and art, theres no doomscrolling or watching random shit, just those channels.

Her phone seems unimportant to her and is normally ran out of battery or lost in the house somewhere. I have the strictest parentals via google family link and every website accessed my phone has to allow.

What I'm getting at is there is very little way for my DD to consume this weird cat information.

If I was you I would do a tech detox and remoce everything to give you time to research parental controls and give her mind rest, say 1 month and only give tech back when everything is restricted and only allow youtube with art channels that are family friendly and non woke - use chatgpt to find some channeld. Setup google family link to restrict all websites.

Use chatgpt if you dont understand parrntal controls, lock everything down.

And get her a life away from tech. Send her to a social group like guides, send her to a girls team sport like netball or football and send to a creative skill building group class like music or art (group is affordable and social)

Tell her the clubs are non-negotisble fior getting tech back, no clubs (social life) - then no tech at home.

I bet after 6 months of that lifestyle and cutting off this cat info that she will be happier and have a better chance of whats left of her childhood and upcoming teenage years.

Good luck and kindly this is on you to fix 💐

It’s not a fashion trend it’s grooming. To see if they are susceptible to being manipulated and to see if they adults around them are too.

You know sometimes on social media when you see a post that’s daft, like a picture of Bette Lynch of coronation street fame that says underneath ‘Best barmaid in Albert Square’. Then underneath a hundred fools are commenting that she’s from coronation street. That’s the start of finding out who is thick enough to be easily manipulated. Who is gullible enough to think a Nigerian prince is in love with them because that is still working now. Who can they contact saying they own a bridge building company in South Africa and they are now on love with Louise from Luton? All they need to seven hundred pounds. People who comment nonsense on nonsense with no critical thinking.

If you can manipulate a child into getting her own mam to buy her a mask and tail because she’s a cat, then I wonder what else you could get her to do?

Firstly, you should be checking where she heard about this nonsense.

And, absolutely do not encourage this.

Limited internet, not limited interests!

Absolutely not. Cats don’t use phones, they catch their own food and toilet outside. Is she doing any of those things? No? Then, she’s not a cat. Obviously.
I wouldn’t entertain this at all.

This is serious. She is not and never will be a cat. There is no such thing as a Therian except in grooming sites that lead to transitioning for youth and are run by some very evil people who are always preying on sensitive young people. Remove her access to the internet immediately and start engaging with her meaningfully. Encourage her to write, to paint, to express herself and be very careful about who is allowed to be in any position of influence over her. Is her school a sensible one, or is it one that still promotes genderwoo ideology and fake personas and pronouns for kids? Does she read, does she cook, does she doe any athletic activity? I hope that you can navigate this successfully: many prepubescent girls go through a confused and moody time that should be helped in ways that build courage and confidence. Sending you my best wishes.

Fine if it’s dress up at home
Not fine if she actually identifies as a cat and wears the tail/mask in public.
I wouldn’t indulge this, I’d explain that a human cannot be an animal. It’s fine to love cats (I do), and even envy their chilled lives as pets, but you can’t ‘be’ one. She’s young enough she can take this in board. Find out why she sees herself that way. Could be an escape from the harsh realities of being a human (even at 9, children can suffer from poor MH).

What on earth is the world coming too, tell her if she wants to be a cat,she can live like one,
Eat cat food off the floor
Use a litter tray
Be put out at night
She'll soon get fed up with such nonsense
Is it a phase you hope she'll grow out of? What happens when she's an adult? Does she go for a job interview dressed as a cat?

Hmmmm, if this was me I’d be discouraging this, distracting her, and moving her awwwway from the internet..

No. How does she even know about this at 11? I would seriously look at what websites she has been accessing and lock down her internet. Don't give this oxygen. Speak to school if it's a group of them.

@pombearmum

You coming back to the thread anytime soon?

Or are you a "one and done" poster... hmmm 🙄