Should I buy my daughter a therian mask and tail?

[pombearmum]

Hi there.

my daughter who is nearly 11 has recently declared that she is a therian. She believes she is half human half cat in fact she’s even got a name for her cat self. Luna. She is so desperate to wear a mask and tail. I really don’t mind but she recently did and was horribly ridiculed by some teenagers. Who shouted at her in the park. She said she didn’t care because you shouldn’t pick on peoples beliefs.

she’s asked me for a new mask and tail for her birthday. I don’t know if I’m being a bad parent buying it for her or a bad parent trying to steer her away from it. Am I opening her up to being massively bullied? She can be whoever she wants to be in front of me and in my opinion there’s far worse things she could do or be then wearing a mask. But the outside world isn’t as supportive.

is anyone else’s child also like mine and how do you deal with the whole not being sure what’s right or wrong thing? Advice would be great please. Sometimes I just don’t know what’s best.

My daughter went through a 'therian' phase. She didnt actually think she was an animal, she is just an animal lover who is neurodivergent and struggles to understand and feel comfortable with people a lot of the time.

She very much enjoyed crafting her own masks and tails with a few friends. I took her to a comic con once and there were lots of other teenaged girls there in masks and tails who were very kind to her.

She was very clear that therians are not furries, but was also conscious of being misunderstood or teased. She was too nervous to wear the items outside the house, other than the comic con.

She grew out of it after a year or so. Nothing bad happened.

I’d smash every device that had access to the internet with a hammer before considering buying my eleven year old child accoutrements for a fetish.

Great stuff guys! - Bogbrush

Have a discussion with her about what being a cat actually is. Tell her that being half cat, half human is ridiculous.

This happened to a family I know. The mum cooked the child's favourite meal but put a bowl of cat food down in the utility. Suddenly the child came to her senses.

Please parent your child OP. They should not know about this stuff, it's not innocent at that age. And take the phone away.

I think that’s a quite a different scenario to the one described by the op. Your daughter was effectively just enjoying creative play, which is normal for children.

She's "desperate for a mask and tail", recently wore a mask and tail in the park, and wants "a new mask and tail for her birthday." So she already has and wears one mask and tail, and you're wondering whether you should say no to buying her an additional or replacement set? Is there some specific reason why you think the new set would be attract more attention (bullying, etc.)? Or is the existing set on its last legs so you're assuming she won't be using it much longer even if she doesn't get a new one?

It's probably a good idea to remind her that most other people are not going to believe that she is half human half cat, just in case she is expecting that they will. Her resisting the bullying is a actually a good sign at her age, but if anti mixed species bullying is frequent and severe where you live, I would worry that it could turn physically aggressive.

She BELEIVES she is hafl human half cat.

Really?

Surely that's what you need to tackle.

What does that actually mean to her?

Time to discuss basic genetics and heredity surely. Dad is human. Mum is human. You are human. Cats are cats. You are not a cat.

I saw a boy wearing something like this the other day, I couldn’t work out why!!!

I’d be biting her therapy sessions instead.

I wouldn’t, no. My eldest knew a boy who in year 7 who had a wolf mask and tail, he wore it to town and outside the house. Now they’re in year 11 and he doesn’t do that anymore. Unfortunately he lost his friends when he dressed up like a wolf. He doesn’t have any friends now and class mates still refer to him as wolf boy. Teenagers don’t forget things like this and keep away from anything remotely embarrassing or weird.

NO.

I wouldn't allow it, my daughters friend was in the therian group in primary and is still teased about it now in year 9. What internet access does she have to know about this?

Absolutely not. Get her into therapy instead and check her internet usage

Tell her not to be so bloody daft. I could not put up with such utter nonsense! Being “horribly ridiculed” is what she needs to snap out of this crap.

Surely this is a wind up. If it’s not, get her off the internet.

Urgh.
Check online activity for furry engagement.
I'd be tempted to get a matching set for yourself, say you've been inspired and go full therian yourself. Watch her entusiasm cool.

Half the kids In my local school are therians, it doesn’t necessarily mean the OP’s child has been accessing the dark web, more likely talking to her friends.

no matter what I think of it, there’s perverts and sickos attached to every single thing our kids are interested.
And honestly, imo, the furry fandom type perves are actually more likely to be obviously hiding in plain sight , at least they’re recognisable by their clothes. perverts working in our youth groups, charities, schools and churches etc, not so much.

horrible comments asking if the child is not very clever etc.
you should be ashamed of yourselves.

Are you insane?

Sure

No

Of course not, you should not be complicit in this madness.

Why is your 10 year old little girl having unsupervised Internet access? And apparently on chat forums too. Christ knows how many paedos she is being groomed by!

This. I can’t believe people are entertaining this crap for more than 5 seconds. I would be howling if my kid did this.

You are setting a dangerous precedent if you allow this.

you need to make clear she is not a cat. She can play as a cat at home but it’s play and make believe and that needs to be made clear to her. Real life is different and at 11 she should be able to tell the difference.

you need to encourage her to engage in real life and gain other interests than this madness.

I DMed you