Doing a wee in garden on playdate - ok or odd?

[PurplePetalPip]

DS4 was invited to a friend’s house for a couple of hours. Have spoken with the mum a few times but not friends or anything. First time leaving him at a friend’s house and I was very anxious leading up to it and during it but he was keen to go.

He said he had a brilliant time and all seemed fine. A little while later he said he’d done a wee in the garden. He knows we don’t do this at home so told me he had said he needed the loo, but his friend’s dad had said it’s ok to wee in the garden.

Im not sure if it’s because I’m anxious about play dates generally but i just need reassurance this is ok. Wouldn’t you tell a house guest where the toilet is?!

I’m not sure of it is relevant but they are Polish - a cultural thing? I want to think of it as completely normal but there’s just that tiny doubt about what if it isn’t - and isn’t it better to be overly cautious?

I am just navigating this new era where he is old enough to want to have play dates so any advice on this welcome also!

I sometimes wee in the garden!

Bit lazy in the home, more usual if it's at a park miles from anywhere, no loos etc

Wouldn't be a deal-breaker for me personally

I don’t think you should be leaving him at that age tbh. It’s most probably laziness but could also be more sinister.

Sounds like a lazy bloke thing.

It’s tricky if they attend a nursery/preschool. In our pre-school we have had a few children do this outside as they are allowed to at home. Kids can’t always distinguish

Nope. No weeing in the garden here.

Woods ect ok, but not the garden.

There are differences between households on this. One of our school run friends families’ lets their son do it. I was a bit shocked the first time I saw it. I wouldn’t personally, if I had sons.

Gobsmacked at how many people think this is normal

Not if there is a toilet available.

Completely fine. Normal here. Good for the garden!

I hate this. I have two boys and have a lot of friends who also have a lot of boys. Garden parties etc always have at least two or three children doing this and it’s not great

My kids loved a wild wee - but not in the garden. More when caught in the park.

Would be fine here. I'd not tell another child to do it, but I wouldn't tell them off if they did. I ask mine to pee on the compost!

Was waiting on this one 😂

It's disgusting. I'd not let them go there again.

Weeing on the lawn is a wonderful way to make it lush and emerald green. Urine contains the nutrients it needs.
So it deters foxes? How about unwelcome visiting cats? If so my address is available to all 4 year old boys…

It's a lazy parent thing to do imo.

A ‘wild wee’ by any chance?

I wouldn’t have an issue with this

Definitely odd, I’d not want a boy weeing in my garden! Is there any chance the dad asked if he could hold it to get to the toilet inside and kid said no? Is he known for leaving it to the final moment before saying he needs to go?

Wee is apparently very good for compost heaps, easier for men and boys obviously, and has the advantage of not getting drips on the bathroom floor.

I lived in France for a while. Nobody batted an eyelid about this sort of thing. Moved to America and it was regarded as absolutely awful. Different cultures do different things. I wouldn't be losing sleep over it.

Maybe he was worried wouldn’t make the loo inside in time so said do it here

I’m pretty chilled about a lot of things. And now including a wild wee in one’s own garden if that’s how they roll.

But a four year old on a drop & go play date with people you barely know? I wouldn’t have done that in the first place.

My DS loved a cheeky wee in the garden when he was small