If you could choose, would you prefer boys, girls or mix of both?

[Aintitfunlivingintherealworld]

Just being nosy really, I have noticed a slight preference amongst my friends and family for having baby girls. I have one of each but thinking back to my younger self I probably would have chose to have all girls.
If you could have chose the sex of your children what would you have picked?

I always wanted one of each, but I definitely wanted a boy. But then the universe decided to give me one child and she's an amazing girl. Now, whenever we hang out with my friends who have boys, I think 'oh thank goodness' and go home grateful for my girl 😆 People tease me about how things are easy now but wait until the teenage years but I have friends who are currently having an absolute nightmare of a time with their teenage sons, so I don't know. Every child is different regardless of gender.

I would have been OK with a mix. However, my first choice would be just girls (which I have.)

Never wanted just boys. Hard to explain why. I just never saw myself as a boy mum. Nothing against boys, some boys are lovely children, and some girls can be a PITA! I know several families with a boy and a girl and the boy is the more likeable child! I just didn't want to be a boy mum. (Lots of girls are lovely by the way!)

I have to say, I have always had a good relationship with both of my girls, and still do now (they're in their early 30s,) and they were stereotypical girls growing up (Barbie, everything pink, dollhouses, teddies, ponies, Disney, pop music, kittens, singing and dancing, theatre etc.) They are both in successful careers now and both have their own place with their partner(s.) Both lovely, beautiful, kind young women.

No guarantee that girls will be what you want/expect, but mine were. (Would have been OK if they hadn't have been by the way!)

It's just that I have zero interest in things boys often seem to be into - like golf, football, rugby, ice hockey, basketball, fishing, skateboarding, martial arts, cycling, etc etc... I couldn't imagine trudging out of an evening to stand in a sports stadium or a muddy field in the cold and rain. I know some boy mums who spend half their waking hours following their son(s) and his/their football, sitting on the edges of the fields in the dark, and they almost all hate it!

I know there is no guarantee that a girl won't be into these stereotypical boy pursuits, but let's face it, they are less likely to be!

DH wanted girls too as he hates sports and most outdoor activities! And he just never saw himself with sons.. He was as thrilled as me when we had 2 girls. He did used to like and play videogames though, and got both our girls into them. (He stopped playing when they were about 8-10, so when he was about 40.) I have always enjoyed videogames too, especially platform games. Oh, and all 4 of us (DH and I, and our 2 DDs,) are interested in transport, (cars, planes, trains, ships, helicopters, motorbikes you name it!) DH and I got this from our dads, and our DDs got it from us. Don't do much transport related hobbies, but just all have an interest...

I know a number of men who were thrilled when they had daughters. It's a myth that all men want sons. Maybe in certain cultures, but many men I know were very happy to have girls! Would have been happy with boys (but were fine with just girls.) My uncle had 4 daughters, and he has always adored 'his girls.'

There also the fact (even though some won't admit it) that girls stay closer to the mum/parents. I (and DH) do actually meet up with/socialise with our DDs much more often than the boy mums I know meet up with their sons. I mean, a few do, but not many, and not often. Many people I know see their adult daughters much more often than people see their adult sons.

Grateful to have had a mix, purely for the experience of each. Many similarities, but people are being foolish if they insist there are no differences.

I always wanted a mix and my 2nd choice would have been girls.

BOYS!!

I genuinely had no preference, didn’t find out until birth. We have one boy and I wouldn’t want it any other way. If we had another, which we won’t, I’d have a slight preference for another boy I suppose, as ours is so much fun.

I didn't want all girls; I really wanted at least one son. I ended up with three boys and no girls and I've always been very happy about that. Of course I'd have been delighted whatever I had, but I never had the visceral desire to have a daughter that many women seem to have.

i have boy girl boy. Had I had 2 girls I would never have gone for a third,

i always had a slight preference for a boy and whilst I absolutely love having a girl I would not have wanted more than 1 of them. My boys are incredibly different to each other in every way but they’re a walk in the park compared to my daughter. Teenage boys, fine. Teenage girl drama and emotions, off the scale stressful

Completely disagree with this! I've pretty much always been closest to my opposite sex sibling. We also never really did anything 'separate' that was sex-differentiated tbh. I mean maybe extremely rarely but I honestly can't think of anything except occasional haircuts.

If I could just snap my fingers and have them - two of each would be nice.

But it’s not to be.

When I was expecting my second I would have been very happy with another boy and actually I felt quite surprised at myself . But only wanted two whatever they turned out to be
But fate got in the way and number two was actually two and three . Boy and girl twins !
All have had their moments but on the whole boy twin was the most challenging !
All successful adults in their own ways now !

Do you think boys are like this naturally? That it’s nature, something innate that makes them so wild and boisterous?

or do you think it’s socialisations- “boys will be boys” and they are simply allowed to behave like that?

ime boys don’t behave much differently to girls. The ones that strongly follow stereotypes so so because that’s what they’re taught. I saw a family in mcd’s recently- the girls were made to sit with the adults, hold small talk and draw quietly. Everyone they got up they were called back to sit down. They boys were sat on a separate table and frequently got up to run around. I actually heard one of the adults say that boys needed to burn off energy.

i know many families that separate off at weekends, mum takes the girls shopping, dad takes the boys off to football.

imo it’s all upbringing. And people who prefer one sex over the other tend to be those who believe in the stereotypes and reinforce them.

I had no gender preference. But I took both my boys and girls to football and ballet. I expected the same behaviours from both. They’ve grown up into balanced adults with a wide range of hobbies and interests, across the stereotypes. I never let anyone tell them they couldn’t do or have anything, and I encouraged them to try as much as possible. Nothing was “for girls” or “for boys”.

As someone who has suffered with infertility my answer is that I could not care less.

Before I had children I would have said girls.
I was actually devastated when I was told my first baby was going to be a boy.
I think id envisioned a little girl who id have loads in common with etc.. a boy felt scary like I wouldn't know what to do

But im actually very close to my son and hes the most similar to me out of all my kids.
I love my daughters too and I am glad ive got the experience of having daughters.
But I was totally wrong to have a preference for girls.
All kids are unique in a way that doesn't correspond to gender really.
That being said im glad I have a mix. I feel like I get to experience it all.
Id love another son but Im too old for more kids now.

All girls which I have.

I have one of each - boy first then girl. I’m glad it’s that way around.

I started quite late at 37 had my last at 41 so I only had two , both girls , was delighted the second was a girl as I’m an only child and thought it would be nice for them growing up having each other . It’s silly and probably my not true but I sometimes think siblings of the same sex are closer . I’m an ideal world I’d have loved four would have been thrilled with two boys also !

A mix of both, which is what I got ❤️

@Usernamenotfound1 I also have one of each and generally speaking there are differences between little boys and little girls - of course not every child will fit the stereotype and of course parenting does play a role, but there are innate differences and they are apparent in every group setting where there are large numbers of kids of both sexes, and it’s not really helpful to say that there aren’t.

My husband was thrilled when we had girls. He was proud as punch taking them out in their pram , I hardly got a look in I used to try and wrestle it off him 😂 he used to joke go and get your own !

during my first pregnancy, I genuinely had no preference and I’ll be honest - I slightly judge people who have gender preferences. Once I had one boy, I had a slight preference for a second boy but pretty sure if I’d had a girl first time I would have had a preference for a second girl.

but basically, I still slightly judge people who care too much about this. I know people can’t help it, but I think many need to try harder to think critically about why they have these feelings rather than sticking expectations on a baby.

Currently pregnant with my second, don’t know yet what they are. Heart of hearts I’d like a second boy but I think that’s just because it’s what I know! I’ll be happy with a girl too but I like the idea of DS having a brother.

Always wanted one of each. Sort of understand having a bit of ‘disappointment’ if ending up with all of one sex (in the sense of never experiencing a boy or girl) but I really don’t get the disappointment specifically with having boys I see on here- including when it’s the first baby or even when mum already has a girl and is upset the second isn’t another girl 😵‍💫 Genuinely don’t understand that at all.

I was never bothered either way, I’m delighted to have two boys and would have loved another of either gender.

Ultimately and genuinely i could not give a single fuck as long as they’re here however DP and I would before we had DC say we were going to have 4 dc, Dudley, Derek, Duncan and Dolly. We did have 4 DC, 3 DS and DD as our last and even though we didn’t name any of them our pet names for them we did get the order correct.
If I could choose I’d choose to have more time, space and money and I’d have had another one or two, any kind, not fussy. I can’t say I’ve enjoyed either sex more than the other, both have been wonderful experiences to raise. Although when they’ve all fucked off and i have empty nest syndrome I might get 4 chinchillas and name them the D names!

I grew up with a sister and I loved that, and it seemed from all the families I knew that same-sex siblings were closer than opposite sex, this seemed especially stark in families with GGB or BBG so I never especially minded if I had boys or girls but I didn't want to have just one on their own. Theoretically I was willing to keep going until I had no singles but I probably would not have done that in reality.

I have 3 boys and would choose it again. It's lovely.