Unsecure pool and 5yo

[Whosright123]

Namechanged to keep this separate from my norml account.

Would you go to a vacation home with an unsecured pool and a non swimming 5 year old? The mere thought gives me anxiety but someone also said that I shouldn’t be difficult and we can just watch the kid.

soooo…. Am I helicopter mom or right if I stay home?

thanks in advance for your answers

Does the 5yo listen to instructions? I would go if they can be trusted to stay away from the pool except when explicitly with an adult.

Stay home. No way would I go. That’s just asking for trouble.

I’m from Australia where it’s mandatory for pools to be securely fenced. It’s saved a lot of drownings over the years.

It would be a hard no for me.

No. Too many risks of accidents.

Providing the 5 year old has no SEN, they would be able to understand that they don’t go near the pool without instruction.

many holiday resorts have an outdoor pool that’s not secured, in fact I can’t think of any holiday place were the pool is secured

I don’t think so, and my child is very compliant. She’s now 6 and I won’t let her go in PIL garden unattended due to a very small pond!

We did this (she could swim a little bit and float), but there were 8 adults and 3 other older kids who could swim to supervise at all times.

Most people won’t let their 5 year old go wandering around a holiday resort in the way they would a house/garden though. Also there is likely to be someone else around in a resort who would spot a child in trouble (I know you shouldn’t rely on other people to keep your child safe, but I’d rather they fell in to a busy holiday resort pool than a pool in a back garden where no one else was around!)!

No - most kids don't drown when they're in a pool, its when their parents think they are safe in bed, or watching TV etc.

Even if you have the most compliant child in the world who genuinely doesn't ever do anything they've been told not to, you're going to have a stressful time rather than a lovely holiday.

What kind of place? A villa with just your family? Or a hotel with lots of people? Pool directly out the back? Or 5 mins walk away?
Does your 5 year old do as they are told???

Assuming you mean a villa with direct access to the pool then not a chance!

I’m a bit surprised by these responses. Most villas have unsecured pools. As long as you lock doors at night and always keep an eye when doors open I think it’s fine.

It’s a childfree friends holiday home. I suspect our child to be neurodiverse, either add or autism.

I think "we" can watch the child is more dangerous than it all being on you. I know a family who lost their child to drowning on a boating holiday in the Norfolk Broads because both parents thought she was with the other.

I cant see it being much of a holiday TBH if there's direct access to the pool from your accomodation.

Depends entirely on the access to the garden/pool area and the abilities of your child. Presumably the pool isn't in the middle of the house! Therefore can your child let themselves out of the house unaided? I know 5 year olds who couldn't work a lock if they were left alone all day....others would do it in less than 5 seconds!

This.

Re the swimming thing. I wouldn't care if my 5 yo could swim or not, the risk remains.

I think you can go but just be watching your child all the time and ensure all doors are locked at bedtime so they can't get out there without someone letting them out.

We went abroad with 2 toddlers to a villa with an unsecured pool last year and it was fine, we just made sure we had eyes on them at all times, which tbh you usually do anyway.

I’ve been taking my kids to my mums house in Spain with an unsecured pool for over 20 years.
this would never have entered my head.
They had it drilled into them as toddlers that they couldn’t go near the pool without supervision.
i used to get them out of the pool if Ihad to pop inside for any reason.
DD2 was a late swimmer, and on her own insistence , used to go in the pool with her floatie suit, fin, armbands and rubber ring 😂

i can’t remember leaving either child at five outside unsupervised anyway so was never an issue.

Go and enjoy. Some of my happiest memories are of us swimming under the stars together

There are pool alarms on Amazon as a back-up to close supervision. Excessive vibration sets them off , as in someone falling in or getting in when they are set

Just to clarify, I used to get them out of the pool well into their teens, not just when they were little

Initially this would have been my response, but after Emilie Kiser’s tragedy and her 4 year old falling into the family pool and drowning after tripping on an inflatable chair, I’d say no

My child could swim a bit at that age due to having lessons from a baby. I still would not go.

Havinf resuscitated kids that have been in pools, not a chance. What if you over excited kid wake up and wanders out. Kids have been known to do this.

You lock the doors? Do people not do this anyway at night?
Not saying that tragic accidents do happen but there is lots that can be done to mitigate against this.
Almost every activity known to man can be twisted in to a ‘what if…’ scenario.
people die by falling onto a knife as they’re emptying their dishwasher, should we ban dishwashers?
Everything comes with risk.
A bit of critical thinking needs to happen otherwise we’d all be paralysed with fear.

I would completely trust my two kids to not go in the pool unsupervised and I’d keep a close eye but I know kids of the same age who would do what they liked at all times. Only you know the child involved and if they would be safe close to an open pool.

Whoever said "we" probably meant "you" can watch your child. So it won't be much of a holiday for you, always having to be vigilant. I would say no without apology.