Bloody kids ; what would you do ?

[IllegallyBrunette]

Dd1 and Dd2 are 10 and 8 and constantly fighting. They bicker from the minute they get up to the minute they go to sleep.

I was just seeing to Ds when I suddenly heard Dd1 crying 'omg look what you've done, you've ruined my new clothes'.

I shouted them both to come uostairs and discovered that dd2 had deliberatly knocked dd1 whilst she was holding her hot choc, and it went all over dd1's new top and white bottoms.
Dd2 said she did it because dd1 poked her hard in the ribs, which dd1 admits.

I have sent them both to bed and told dd2 that if the clothes don't come clean, she wil not get back the £5 that i borrowed from her for change the other day.

Dd2 is now shrieking about her lost fiver, and Dd1 is saying that she doesn't want to be in bed like a baby. I am thinking that the cap fits so tough.

it's really hard when sibs clash...mine are 7 and 10 and have their moments.
What worked for me was making them work together sometimes (sort of marble jar but one down, both down IFKWIM. )
They are pretty close now though the older one does need to have 'alone' time increasingly, I find. And the younger one thrives on getting me or dh to himself...

The dd's have never been close tbh, not really, they have always fought like cat and dog.

I think dd1 resents dd2 as dd2 was such a nightmare baby and toddler that she kind of got in the way of mine and dd1's relationship to the point that it never really got back on track.

Dd is dying for me to treat her a bit more grown up, but how can I when she acts like a 2yr old sometimes.

I am just no good at parenting, I always feel like such a failure

I lose my temper too quickly, and need to learn to pick my battles.

Crap.

You had to deal with a hard situation, you did your best and its over.
I'm guessing you are tired as at this time of the day things do get on top of you more, in the morning it won't seem so bad.
Don't be so hard on yourself, you're doing ok.

Ib mine are like this. especially dc1, 9 and dc2,8 and dc2 and dc3, 6, so it's always dc2 involved. The younger three dc's are less trouble in that way atm.

It drives me round the bloody bend and I alternate between screaming like a banshee for a few weeks and then getting on top of it with role play, charts, positive statements etc ( these always always make a huge difference btw) but I'm human (just) and can't always keep it up.

Good luck, you're not alone and you're not a failure!

My 2 DS's are 4 and 9, they just cannot be together without winding each other up, it drives us mad . I just hope they grow out of it before they kill each other!

It has no reflection on your parenting skills Nutty (you can change your name but we're still going to call you that )