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Original poster

Footballs over the fence - AAARRGGHHH!!!

81 replies

ssd · 09/06/2008 22:49

we live in a tiny house with a tiny strip of a garden. both ds's are football mad, ds1 esp. kicked a ball before he could walk

elderly, well in her 60'2 neighbour is very fond of her gardening and has every type of flower imaginable in her tiny strip of garden

we have a large fence and we recently put up trellis to try to raise it up further

the boys football goes over the fence on average once/twice every few weeks, they play well but at 7 and 9 sometimes hit it too high and it goes over in accident

said neighbour goes mad, that ball broke a stem etc etc.

this has been going on for a few years now

boys can't go to the local park alone as too far and they get told off by other neighbours for playing in the street in case a car gets scratched(they've never done this)

I'm at my wits end, I'm constantly telling the boys not to play which to them means don't play football, as I said ds1 is football mad, has many other things to play with but only interested in a ball

is there anyone esle with this problem, feel like I'm going mad, have phoned the community police who said you both have to live together, but neighbour is on my case whenever I step out the door

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Original poster
ssd · 09/06/2008 22:51

can't be alone in this

OP posts:
jollyjolly · 09/06/2008 22:54

can't you find some time each week to take them to the park so they can have a kick about, and have a new rule where they don't play footie in the garden, but distract them by providing another garden game for the garden??
I know your kids should be able to do what they want, but you'll have to come to compromise with your neighbour

VeniVidiVickiQV · 09/06/2008 22:56

Sorry, but, if I were your neighbour it'd drive me mad too.

Footballs are for parks or pitches only in my house.

Can't you get them a swingball game or something?

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Original poster
ssd · 10/06/2008 07:57

we have had swingball, water slides, golf putting , all at different stages, but football remains the only thing they want to play

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mumblechum · 10/06/2008 08:02

Sorry but YABU.

I'd go spare if someone's football went into my garden and damaged a plant or plants at £7 to £15 per plant plus all the TLC that goes into gardening.

I think you should be taking them to the park/playground, or if no time, why not arrange to take turns with another mum of football mad boys to take them out?

Chocolateteapot · 10/06/2008 08:08

I do understand but my Mum is on the opposite end of the footballs (I was wondering for a moment if you were here neighbour !)

She loves sitting outside but it got to the stage where she was constantly wondering if she would be hit by a flying ball. One landed on her conservatory roof which didn't go down. She just wants to be able to sit in her garden and relax and I think having raised two children of her own she is pretty entitled to a bit of peace now.

Her way of dealing with it is to keep the footballs and not answer the door when people come to get them back (for ages she had a hip problem and getting up to answer the door was a really big deal). I thought she was being OTT for ages but saw how the collection of balls soon mounted up, she has a point really.

Morloth · 10/06/2008 11:00

Yeah have to say I am with your neighbour on this one. A football every now and again (like every six months or so) is not a problem but every couple of weeks? Not on.

Apart from damaging her plants what (if like Chocolateteapot's mum) she was sitting outside and it hit HER or someone else?

They either need to learn to kick low and slow in the backyard or they can't play with the football at all there and have to play something else.

Iota · 10/06/2008 11:12

sorry but my 2 are the same age and I won't let them play football in our very small garden any more - they are too strong, it was OK when they were toddlers.

They now play at the perk after school if I am with them or in the street with a sponge ball or in the local playground.

LookingForwardToSummer · 10/06/2008 11:13

Put mesh over your garden, like a fruit cage! I'm afraid I agree with your neighbour - I have been known to cry over damaged plants, they are my green babies!

nickytwotimes · 10/06/2008 11:15

ssd, I agree with the others. Weekly is too often for a ball to go into the neighbours garden. I wouldn't like that either. Also, playing with a football on the street is not on because even the most careful and considerate child can accidently kick a ball through a window or off a car, as happens to us constantly. I love to see the kids palying outside but not with balls.

nickytwotimes · 10/06/2008 11:16

that should be 'outside on the street'

Original poster
ssd · 10/06/2008 13:10

ah well, we'll see what happens

OP posts:
bigTillyMint · 10/06/2008 13:12

SSD I know how you feel - my son goes to the park almost every day to play football, but it is like an obsession for him and he just wants to be active ALL the time. We let him play with a blow-up beach ball in his room - nothing has gotten broken yet and he is happy!

mumblechum · 10/06/2008 13:19

How about one of those ginormous golf nets? We had one in the front garden when dh was in his golf obsession to avoid hitting passing cars with golf balls. (tis a v v large front garden ).

They're about 14by14 feet so should do the trick

Original poster
ssd · 10/06/2008 16:21

wow, mumble can you give me a link, sounds good!

hi tilly, trouble is the park is too far away to go on his own and I can't take him everyday

he's football mad and I think if you don't have a son who is footie mad this problem is hard to understand

OP posts:
mumblechum · 10/06/2008 17:05

We bought ours from Costco a few years ago. Any sports equipment website should have one.

surreylady · 10/06/2008 17:37

Do you have those training footballs on ropes - my son got one for his birthday you can kick etc but it is retractable and can be reeled back in or limited about £10 I think maybe cheaper - might not be their ideal but could be a good compromise on occassion.

bigTillyMint · 10/06/2008 20:10

SSD I agree. My son can't go to the park on his own either, but it is just over the road from us, so not too much hassle to take him. But we can't be there every minute of every day!

Also, get him some shoot annuals (or the like), my son spends hours reading and re-reading them so he can show everyone how much he knows about football!

wotulookinat · 10/06/2008 20:27

I understand your side of the situation, but I also see your neighbour's side and sympathise with her. Where I used to live, one side of my home was the edge of a green and kids used to kick balls against the wall. They meant no harm, but it meant ornaments falling of shelves, and noise. When I asked them to stop, most of the kids were fine about it. They said they weren't allowed all the way to the park on their own - shame, but not my problem. Your neighbour's life shouldn't be interrupted because of your kids playing football.

Original poster
ssd · 10/06/2008 21:57

what about living and let live though?

my neighbour regularly has dinner parties late into the night and the noise keeps my kids awake, ds2 goes to bed on those nights with ear plugs in his ears

these houses are too small to not put up with some things that are annoying from each other, we are trying to stop the football, but it's not easy, I can't sit out the back or the front watching them play for hours on end.

OP posts:
whatdayisit · 10/06/2008 22:25

My DS has a kind of swingball thing with a football attached, it that helps.

wotulookinat · 10/06/2008 23:18

The issue with the footballs is different to a noise issue - the balls are actually damaging her garden - a garden that she has worked very hard for.

handlemecarefully · 10/06/2008 23:34

Absolutely gobsmacked that people are saying that YABU. Totally is disbelievesville here. It happens once every few weeks you said - so hardly a daily or even weekly occurence.

I would swallow my pride (hard for me) and invite neighbour over for a cuppa and talk it through.

handlemecarefully · 10/06/2008 23:35

Totally 'in' disbelievesville

retiredgoth · 10/06/2008 23:40

....with "handlemecarefully"

Miserable gits!

...the boys are only playing football, give 'em a break.

I speak as one whose house is next to a small strip of public land. Footballs enter my garden on an hourly basis. This is sometimes irritating, but children are allowed to play, methinks.....