oh god when i think what could have happened i feel sick...

[mankymummy]

was loading the car up today, took DS (3 in august) out of the car, set him outside friends front door and told him to go up and find friend. started fidding with stuff in the car for maybe 15 seconds then looked up to see DS running down the road.

i can't believe i was so idiotic. what if there had been a main road?

what if some pervert had picked him up?

what if i hadn't seen him before he reached the corner and had carried on loading up the car...?

mankymummy we've all been there done that, don't beat yourself up over it.

there wasn't a main road, and there wasn't a pervert, had there been a main road I doubt you would have done it anyway!!

...but you did see him so it's ok.

I put DD2 down on the landing with her back to the wall last week and told her to stand still while i got the flat door open, she's 20mo.
Turned round 2.5 seconds later and she was teetering on the edge of the top step...

but you did see him. and you won't make the same mistake again.
i felt like this a couple of weeks ago when i forgot to close the stairgate, turned my back on ds for about a second and a half, and discovered the boy that has only just learned to crawl upstairs was somehow waving at me from the top of our (very steep, hard, wooden) stairs. and threatening to come down again headfirst.
we'll all have a few near misses over the years and it's heartstopping but dont beat yourself up over it.

my ds nearly got hit by a speedy car in portugal last year. He decided to suddenly run across the road just as a car was whizzing up the road, it slammed on its brakes and stopped about 2inches in front of him.

i have never shaken so much in my life.
thank god they stopped in time.

but i could have lost him.

all because i was in a hurry.

and the first thing i thought when i looked up was, god thats a really little kid on his own, where's his parents? then realised he was mine.

belly up... shaking? i know what you mean, it was over an hour ago and im still shaking now.

Poor you. We've all done it. Makes you feel so sick inside doesn't it?

I used my horror mistake as a reminder to myself not to worry so much when dh had my ds. I was so sure that he would do something stupid, that I would never do! I was a reliable sensible mummy!! So in a bizarre way it helped me to relax a bit.

Glad to hear that your little one is fine.

You won't be doing that again then!

no i wont. im not going out of the house again. ever.

I actually did lose DD in Bracknell about 15 years ago - she was 3. We were watching the fountain clock & I could see her pink jacket all the time - until I realised it was a different little girl in a pink jacket.
She was gone for 15 minutes & I'd practically arranged her funeral in that time, until a lovely lady told me she had found her & she was with a security guard in the shopping centre.

Not sure if this is why (according to my children) I am now the most cautious person in the world.

If it's any consolation, the only serious accident that's ever happened to a child of mine happened right in front of my eyes, on play equipment considered safe for her age group. She still managed to knock herself unconscious and was out of it for the best part of the day. This was 9 years ago and I still can't think about it for too long without shaking.

thanks everyone. calmed down now but think i will have nightmares tonight.

i was lax, i will not be doing that again i can tell you. but will try not to turn into psycho mummy

As someone else said, we've all been there. There are so many split second situations where you think 'what if....'. But the reality is that your back was turned for what, 15 seconds, and your child was fine. Of course no one wants to take unnecessary risks, but part of parenting (and growing up) is realising that there are many situations which will make us feel scared/uncomfortable etc. It's life. You learn from it and move on. And as cory said, accidents can happen right under your nose. I remember feeling terribly guilty once when my friend and i were playing in my garden with our 2 year old ds's. My ds was up at the top of the climbing frame (he was a great climber having been taught how by his big sisters). My friend meanwhile was following her same age son around, hardly letting him out of her sight, and then he climbed on one of those small, low bouncy trampoline things and bounced straight off head first!! he was fine, but I felt guilty - as if she was so much more wary and watchful than me, but it was her ds got hurt.

When DS1 was just 3 DH went out and left the gate open, I didn't realise and let DS1 wander outside to play, something we do all the time. No more than 20 seconds later I had an awful feeling ran after him to discover him being carried back into the yard by one of the 'scummy' lads from over the road!!! He'd wandered out onto the path next to the main road and was making his way down to the park. The 'scummy' lad had spotted him out of the window and legged it after him. Never in my life have I been so scared and so grateful, radically changed my opinion of apparently 'scummy' lads and taught me many lessons and books and covers as well as about closing gates!!!

mankym, you did see him so try not to beat yourself up about it.

As quadrophenia said, you wouldn't have done it if there was a main road, and perverts aren't lurking on every corner waiting for wayward DCs

These things happen and near misses are part of learning to be a parent. It'll make you a bit more aware next time and you'll make sure he has knocked on friends door before going about your tasks.

We lost DS in IKEA and at Eureka in Halifax recently. Heartstoppingly worrying for a few minutes, and he now knows that if he is lost in a shop etc to go and ask someone who works there for help.

I know how you feel. I once left the side gate open because it was rubbish day and I'd put the bags out. Later, I opened the back door and let my 18 month old in to the garden. I had TOTALLY FORGOTTEN that the side gate was open. She was half way to my friend's house when I found her. My friend had a little girl her age, and she was toddling in that direction.

It sent shivers down my spine and for weeks, if I thought of it when I was in bed I had to get out of bed and walk around the house for a while.

My brother walked from our house to his grandparents (about half a mile) at the age of 2... he is now a perfectly unharmed 40-year-old BTW. It happens. NO child gets through childhood without something occurring to scare the crap out of the parents at least a dozen times.
There there love

daisy the door was open and i thought he'd gone in.

glad i'm not alone in having done this though. seemed to have had a bad day saturday he tried to ride his horse on wheels down the steo too and bumped his nose! [bad parent emoticon]

hi mankym.....just to reassure you, I lost DS today at a local tourist attraction...one with water and mud and lots of people. i was beside myself thinking he had fallen in and drowned or had been abducted as he was there one minute and then gone the next. I was just on my way back to the entrance to get help when he jumped out at me.....i was so terrified and livid with him, but I think he got the message and has been very humble all afternoon.

He must have run like the wind though; he was in a doorway, I got to it within 20 seconds and he was gone

hi daisy... think DS must have run like the wind too, cant believe he got so far so quickly.

how old is your DS?

six...so he should bloody well know better