At what age can you leave a child at home alone for 15-20 minutes?

[december2020]

As a preface, DS is 4 - so I am nowhere near this stage.

However, it did get me thinking on what is the age and stage that you can leave a child at home alone for 15-20 minutes?

Of course there is always a variance depending on how mature they are, but on a general level?

I think when they ask or are happy to be left is a reasonable indication, using common sense and how much you know your child. When DD1 was about 7/8, quite often DD2 would ask if she could stay watching TV while I went out for something briefly with DD2.

Whatever age they're ready for it, which will vary from child to child. DD was ready at 6, DS I think is ready now at 7 but haven't left him yet, but I will be doing it over the summer for short periods to practice.

But for some perspective, I went to a parents info evening at school last week, where my DS will be starting 1st grade in the autumn. The headteacher told us about the afterschool club, and told us we can cancel our child's place in December if we think they're ready by then to go home alone and be alone until we get back from work (so longer than 15 minutes, up to several hours). She was talking about children who, if oldest in the year, will be soon turning 8, the youngest will have just turned 7.

Depends on the child. I left mine from age 5 or 6 for 20 minutes. They just sat in front of the TV and were happy to be left. I come from a country where this is normal though and was latched key child from the age of 7 growing up.

Do you mean 999? If so mine would always go to a neighbour anyway. Once when a pipe burst and we were out my 10 year old got the neighbour to help (after he put a bucket under it).
If not 999 we all survived to about 2005 before we had mobiles.

9 here . With an iPad so he could WhatsApp call. I nip out for 15/20 mins to collect his brother and leave him gaming .

I left mine for 30 mins or so from about age 10. Both DSs were fine with this, but DD didn’t really like it, and didn’t want to be alone at home if it was dark (even if it was early in the day, 4/5pm ish). She is 14 now and still messages me to find out when I’ll be home as soon as I’ve left! She’d just rather I was home.

I’ve just started leaving my 9.5 year old home alone for short periods (15/20 mins) and did the same with my eldest who is now 11 and is happy at home for a couple of hours now (and is often out and about with her friends). The 9 year old doesn’t have a phone but can FaceTime me from his iPad.

If you have an Alexa or similar, children can use those to call people or 999.

I’m really surprised at the responses, as compared to my own childhood they seem quite late. I started being left for 30 mins by age 7, and by age 9 I was left all day whilst my parents worked - I had a house key and would go out and play with friends, come back & heat myself up some lunch and then go out again.

Tbh I have a large garden. If I go to my shed/ to water veggies/ our to get something out of the car it’s all out of hearing distance, and I often do that.

It’s further to me to go to my car at home than it is to pop to next door neighbour front door.

It's pathetic isn't how we're all frightened into infantilising our children by "society". As a 70s child I played out with my sister from the age of 4 (she was 5). In the woods and fields and streams. I walked to school from age 5. I navigated a bus/train/bus to school on my own even missing connections and having to walk sometimes from age 11. I went to the dentist on my own from age 12. I stayed out all day playing with the friend across the woods without a mobile phone. I cycled miles to get to the stables and went riding on my own.
Children aren't less competent unless we keep them that way. It saddens me that if my son plays out he has to do it alone because his friends are always too busy (over scheduled with activities) and is therefore less safe. But it's cruel, unnatural and bad for his development to keep him locked up in cotton wool. Poor lad isn't even allowed to the dentist on his own whereas my father had left school and was working by his age (15).
He's been left alone for short periods since 8 (an hour). He's been left alone for long periods (whole day) since 12. He's been alone for occasional overnights since 15 (it's not illegal). But he's very mature, we've been close by, and he/we have a whole village support system.
You'll know when they're ready but it's always nerve racking the first few times. I couldn't do it if we didn't have mobiles and every base covered because I'd be too anxious.
Rise up and fight for their right to grow up properly, with skills, resilience, self reliance and self esteem!

There is no legal age that a child can be left alone, obviously there are safeguarding issues with younger children and if you were leaving them for long periods often then there would be potential neglect issues but as an infrequent one off then it really depends on the child. My DS has just turned 8yrs in April and has been left alone in the house for short periods (around 35-45mins) on 4 occasions now since he was 7.5yrs. He is extremely mature and sensible for his age and knows how to ring me if he needs me while I'm out (he has rang once to ask if he could have crisps instead of a banana for a snack). The door is locked and he has a key to get out in an emergency, and he knows to call me to check the ring doorbell if anyone comes.

I was 11 when my mum went to work. I got home, locked myself in, got a snack, set the table and watched tv instead of doing my homework.
I was home for about 2 hours before my mum got home and it was fine, safe - but that was back in the olden days.
They left me home alone at 8yrs to go a few blocks to my grandparents or to the market and that was no big deal.
We had neighbors I could run to if I needed to but we lived in a sleepy little town, so it was never necessary.
I think by 8 kids should be okay for an hour or so if they have an adult to call in an emergency.
I remember feeling grown up and excited and nervous all at the same time. That quickly wore off when the chores started.

i’ve left my kids at home while i worked since they were 11 and 13. both girls and sensible. sometimes we don’t have any other option.

Mine had to walk to the station, take a train from a busy commuter station and then catch the schoolbus from age 11. Doing that without having any preparation in terms of being by themselves would have been so much harder!