Active discussions

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Original poster

Grandparent nickname

95 replies

moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 13:47

LO is only a couple of months’ old, and mine and my husband’s first.

My in-laws have been grandparents for a while as BIL and SIL have two children - one girl and one boy.

The eldest (our niece) couldn’t pronounce ‘Grandad’ when she was younger and so called FIL “GooGoo.”

This then stuck and so when our nephew arrived, he also began calling him GooGoo.

I, however, am really not a fan of baby words like this and believe children should be talk to speak properly. I don’t want them getting teased in school when referring to their Grandparent as GooGoo! Niece and nephew are now 10 and 5 respectively and STILL calling FIL this nickname. Both niece and nephew are very behind in school/developmentally and I really don’t think things like this help.

Our LO is only a few months old, but MIL and FIL are already pushing this nickname with him. I slightly understood it when nephew arrived, as it was his sister’s nickname, but I personally don’t want our son adopting this and don’t see what relation this has to him.

It makes me cringe and I would like him to use actual words.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 15:46

greengreyblue · 08/04/2025 15:44

I asked my mum what she wanted to be called. I think you have to take that into account. I’m in my 50s and if my 24 year old had a child I wouldn’t be ready for Grandma!!! I’d probably come up with a slightly less aging nickname.😂

Hahaha! Love it. Ours - on both sides - are well into their 60s now, so I think now is as good a time as any to accept their new… promotions. 😉

OP posts:
Fluffyholeysocks · 08/04/2025 15:48

moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 15:22

Thank you, you understand me! 😂 How did you manage it; just persist in calling him Grandad and leave them to it? And did DC adopt the baby name at all?

Show quote history

Yes, we just continued to call him Grandad, as this was the name the children had always used. We are still in this weird situation of him referring to himself as 'chingey name' and the kids calling him Grandad eventhough they are now adults!

Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 15:49

Fluffyholeysocks · 08/04/2025 15:48

Yes, we just continued to call him Grandad, as this was the name the children had always used. We are still in this weird situation of him referring to himself as 'chingey name' and the kids calling him Grandad eventhough they are now adults!

Show quote history

That’s encouraging!

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
Hadalifeonce · 08/04/2025 15:51

Our DD couldn't say granddad or grandma, so came up with his own name for them, 25 years later it is still used by both DC, it isn't a babyish name, but is different to the ones their cousins use.

KnickerFolder · 08/04/2025 15:56

I don’t really see the issue. Googoo is his name but he is their grandfather 🤷‍♀️Just teach your DC that. By the time they start school, DC understand that their parents are mum and dad to them, Janet and John to some family, Auntie Janet and Uncle John to their cousins, and that Biff and Chip are their brother and sister.

They will be far more influenced by what you say, their friends and what they hear or see on TV and books than your family.

If you are really concerned, just teach them that before they start school and explain that Googoo is a nickname that no one else will understand. Or refer to him as “your grandad, Googoo” lots when you talk about him.

We have lots of silly nicknames in our family, sometimes we even say “my/your nickname” like your family do but I don’t think anyone has ever used the nickname to anyone outside the family.

Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 15:57

Hadalifeonce · 08/04/2025 15:51

Our DD couldn't say granddad or grandma, so came up with his own name for them, 25 years later it is still used by both DC, it isn't a babyish name, but is different to the ones their cousins use.

Cute! FWIW I think this is absolutely fine when organic like this. I suppose my issue is ILs trying to encourage us and our LO to use this nickname when it hasn’t come naturally (and isn’t a word)! They seem to get slightly offended when we just use Grandad. It wasn’t our child’s nickname at the end of the day - completely different family.

OP posts:
Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 15:57

KnickerFolder · 08/04/2025 15:56

I don’t really see the issue. Googoo is his name but he is their grandfather 🤷‍♀️Just teach your DC that. By the time they start school, DC understand that their parents are mum and dad to them, Janet and John to some family, Auntie Janet and Uncle John to their cousins, and that Biff and Chip are their brother and sister.

They will be far more influenced by what you say, their friends and what they hear or see on TV and books than your family.

If you are really concerned, just teach them that before they start school and explain that Googoo is a nickname that no one else will understand. Or refer to him as “your grandad, Googoo” lots when you talk about him.

We have lots of silly nicknames in our family, sometimes we even say “my/your nickname” like your family do but I don’t think anyone has ever used the nickname to anyone outside the family.

Thank you, this is helpful!

OP posts:
W0tnow · 08/04/2025 16:00

If he likes being called by that nickname then just leave it. Loads of little kids have odd names for their grandparents. I know one called Poo! It’s totally fine.

Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 16:03

W0tnow · 08/04/2025 16:00

If he likes being called by that nickname then just leave it. Loads of little kids have odd names for their grandparents. I know one called Poo! It’s totally fine.

Edited

😂😂 this has tickled me.

OP posts:
neilyoungismyhero · 08/04/2025 16:06

It would be ironic if your child comes out with a name a million times worse than goo goo...

treesandsun · 08/04/2025 16:08

I wouldn't have an issue with a pet name generally but I would with that one specifically. I would just encourage granddad or grandpa or whatever you prefer and see what your child comes up with.

Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 16:08

neilyoungismyhero · 08/04/2025 16:06

It would be ironic if your child comes out with a name a million times worse than goo goo...

Yes… then I will be deleting the thread and eating my hat. 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 16:09

treesandsun · 08/04/2025 16:08

I wouldn't have an issue with a pet name generally but I would with that one specifically. I would just encourage granddad or grandpa or whatever you prefer and see what your child comes up with.

Thank you!

OP posts:
junebirthdaygirl · 08/04/2025 16:17

My older sister was the first gc. In those days..the 60s GD was called Grandfather and she went with FaFa and we all followed. We are in our 60s now, he is long gone and we still say FaFa! None of us struggled with learning or speech and all have university degrees..its part of our fondness for him and all the beautiful memories. I wouldn't take it too seriously.

Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 16:22

junebirthdaygirl · 08/04/2025 16:17

My older sister was the first gc. In those days..the 60s GD was called Grandfather and she went with FaFa and we all followed. We are in our 60s now, he is long gone and we still say FaFa! None of us struggled with learning or speech and all have university degrees..its part of our fondness for him and all the beautiful memories. I wouldn't take it too seriously.

This is very sweet. Equally, though, niece and nephew are not our children. 🤷‍♀️ We’re an entirely different family unit. At least that’s the way we view it. I appreciate there will be cultural differences.

OP posts:
Abitlost1 · 08/04/2025 16:31

@moonmaker93 you sound absolutely repulsed by your nephew and neice. You want no association with them and your dc (who is only a few months old!!)
I don’t like baby talk but developmental delays are nothing to do with baby talk and only in extreme causes are “caused” by parents. How horrible to blame their parents. Really awful op.

KnickerFolder · 08/04/2025 16:34

moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 16:22

This is very sweet. Equally, though, niece and nephew are not our children. 🤷‍♀️ We’re an entirely different family unit. At least that’s the way we view it. I appreciate there will be cultural differences.

Show quote history

True but your DC may well choose to call their DGF Googoo like their cousins or come up with their own name, regardless of what you choose to refer to him as 😂 Or they will use several different names interchangeably. You probably have lots of different nicknames for your DS yourself…

I have known of a couple of “Poo”s and we have a Pooh. I don’t think it’s an uncommon nickname. Be careful what you wish for 😂

Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 16:35

Abitlost1 · 08/04/2025 16:31

@moonmaker93 you sound absolutely repulsed by your nephew and neice. You want no association with them and your dc (who is only a few months old!!)
I don’t like baby talk but developmental delays are nothing to do with baby talk and only in extreme causes are “caused” by parents. How horrible to blame their parents. Really awful op.

Okay, I think you might be projecting slightly here. I love my niece and nephew dearly, and their parents FWIW. I haven’t suggested otherwise. We just have different approaches for our children, and that’s ok! At least… I thought it was. And therein lies my dilemma - ILs don’t seem to be happy with us using ‘Grandad’ instead. 🤷‍♀️ My PoV is that it’s our little family (my DH, LO and I) and we can use whatever words we see fit!

OP posts:
Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 16:36

KnickerFolder · 08/04/2025 16:34

True but your DC may well choose to call their DGF Googoo like their cousins or come up with their own name, regardless of what you choose to refer to him as 😂 Or they will use several different names interchangeably. You probably have lots of different nicknames for your DS yourself…

I have known of a couple of “Poo”s and we have a Pooh. I don’t think it’s an uncommon nickname. Be careful what you wish for 😂

Show quote history

Someone else made this point and now I’m scared. 😂

OP posts:
W0tnow · 08/04/2025 16:36

My kids called my dad a silly nickname and he absolutely loved it. He was completely batshit crazy about his grandkids. Batshit. It was nice to indulge him.

HaddyAbrams · 08/04/2025 16:37

My mum insisted when we were growing up that we called our uncle by his real name eg "Uncle Simon" not the totally unrelated to his real name nickname that my cousins used eg "Uncle Pickle"
We Thought it was ridiculous, he wanted to be called Uncle Pickle, we wanted to call him Uncle Pickle and so we did.

When I had my DC we asked all our parents and step-parents what they wanted to be called and that's what we call them. If nicknames had arisen organically then we'd use those, but they haven't.

Edited to add: When SIL had her DC, MIL claimed she didn't like the grandparent name we used for her, despite her choosing it herself. So now the sets of cousins use different names for her. Which I think is weird TBH. Especially as SIL and her DC used to correct my DC as to her name.
Should point out they are ex in-laws who disowned us all so it stopped being a problem. But it was annoying when DC were small.

Abitlost1 · 08/04/2025 16:39

Why would I be “projecting “, all my dcs use the”proper words” in our language for grandparents. You are saying that to me to shut down what I said down. I also don’t like baby language in older dcs but to suggest the children are “developmentally behind” because of what their parents are doing is really horrible . How would they feel if they knew you said that ?

Original poster
moonmaker93 · 08/04/2025 16:44

Abitlost1 · 08/04/2025 16:39

Why would I be “projecting “, all my dcs use the”proper words” in our language for grandparents. You are saying that to me to shut down what I said down. I also don’t like baby language in older dcs but to suggest the children are “developmentally behind” because of what their parents are doing is really horrible . How would they feel if they knew you said that ?

Well they won’t know I think that, because I wouldn’t be as unkind as to say so. However, quite honestly, do I think that them plonking their DC in front of an iPad constantly, avoiding talking to them and reading with them etc etc has been unhelpful in that regard? Yes. Does it mean I love any of them any less? No, of course not! We just have different approaches to parenting, which is okay. People are allowed to be different and have different approaches. Again, hence my entire point/perspective - I personally believe we should be able to call our DIL ‘Grandad’ and not feel obliged to adopt the nickname when it hasn’t come naturally.

OP posts:
KnickerFolder · 08/04/2025 16:58

And therein lies my dilemma - ILs don’t seem to be happy with us using ‘Grandad’ instead. 🤷‍♀️ My PoV is that it’s our little family (my DH, LO and I) and we can use whatever words we see fit!

Words and names are a different matter though.

Use the correct word to describe the person eg your grandad and your DC will be likely to do the same when referring to them to other people.

Silly nicknames aren’t baby talk. Don’t you have a silly nickname or use terms of endearment for your DH?

I do think the person being called the name ought to get say, as well as you, It’s their name! Would you like it if your siblings insisted you were to be called Aunt Elizabeth if everyone else called you Bezza but they thought it was too naff? I could see your point if he had made up Googoo but it’s already his nickname, he has an emotional attachment to it.

FrootScoot · 08/04/2025 17:02

I kind of think it’s up to the Grandparent to decide what they want to be called.
I grew up calling my Grandparents Grandma and Grandpa.
When I was pregnant with DC1, the first Grandchild in the family PIL made it clear they thought Grandma and Grandpa felt too old for them and they wanted to be be Taid (they’re Welsh) and Nana (Not the Welsh term but DH’s Grandmother is the original Nain and she didn’t want two Nains) I completely respected that even though I don’t really like Nana because it sounds like baby talk.
As it turned out my Parents became Grumpa and Mumgar and FIL got Taidy only Nana gets her chosen name 🤦‍♀️