No annual leave left during school holiday and no childcare

[ExcitingTimes2023]

Hi!

I was hoping someone could advise on what they do in this situation.

I have 2 children, a 18 month old and a 3 year old. My eldest is an august baby and she goes to school this September. The annual leave calender for this coming year opened a couple of weeks ago, I went to book some time off to cover some (not all) of the school holidays. I understand it has to be fair so I was hoping to book a couple of weeks and my partner we do the same. And we could request alternate shifts the remaining weeks to ensure one of us are home with the children (both shift workers).

However already there is no annual leave during the school holidays left so I’m not sure what we are going to do for childcare. Like I said we could request alternate shifts but I’m not sure our departments would honour that every single school holiday week, and it would mean we spend no time together as a family. I understand it has to be fair and I wasn’t expecting to have all the time off during the holidays but to get zero weeks off during my child’s first 6 months of school just seams a bit unfair. I spoke to my senior who was sympathetic but couldn’t help.

now I know there are holiday clubs and when my child is a bit older I’m sure she would manage but she is very shy and reserved at the moment and very nervous in new settings and hates places which was really noisy, so I’m not keen to use these until she is a little more confident in herself. I also have a younger child to drop off at nursery so logistics would be a nightmare to get to work on time. What other options are available childcare wise during the holidays? or am I just going to have to come to terms with alternate shifts and no quality family time during holidays?

Im just feeling a bit gutted as my first child starting school is overwhelming as it is without having to worry about this. If she was one of these confident children that just gets on with everyone I wouldn’t be worrying so much but I just know my daughter! Next year I’m literally going to be stood at the annual leave folder the second it opens to get a good few weeks booked!

Not that it matters as everyone is entitled to book their annual leave when suits them, but at least half of the school holiday leave has been booked by people with no children or people who’s children have fled the nest so I guess that adds to why I feel so deflated. but I’m trying to remind myself that I don’t get a say when or why other people need to use their leave. Trying to stay impartial is hard though.

Other than unpaid leave or a part time nanny or au pair, (some people do shares) there is also seeing if there is a qualified workawayer, I have friends who have had this support before, someone who wants to visit the area and will work in exchange for a place to sleep... But I guess space may be an issue too
.... Just a thought....

So the annual leave calendar opened a couple of weeks ago but you didn’t look until today? That’s on you.

My husband and I have to cover 66 days of school holidays this year. We have 28 days holiday each which includes bank holidays. We book our son into holiday clubs well in advance and plan our family holidays round this to ensure we get at least a week together as a family.

When you’re a parent you have to be hella organised and get everything sorted literally at the beginning of the annual leave year to ensure that you have everything covered.

Where does your child currently go for childcare? Nursery will accept children up until their 5th birthday (I believe) if that’s an option?

Not that it matters as everyone is entitled to book their annual leave when suits them, but at least half of the school holiday leave has been booked by people with no children or people who’s children have fled the nest so I guess that adds to why I feel so deflated. but I’m trying to remind myself that I don’t get a say when or why other people need to use their leave.

Everybody has a family life, even if it's different to yours. You clearly don't really believe that colleagues without young children deserve to choose when they take their leave. I hope you do a better job of covering up your resentment at work. If I heard a colleague making these sorts of comments, I'd be really pissed off.

Why did you leave it for a "couple of weeks" before you booked leave? Your lack of planning is not someone else's problem.

Was going to say this - I really struggled with my August born - only allowed 2 hours a day in holiday clubs according to Ofsted rules so that was useless. Even Barracuda camp started at 5.

I'd be tempted to request parental leave and use AL for the settling in period if you need it (some schools do part days).

Unpaid parental leave or you need to find a new job. You’re going to have kids in primary for the next 8 years at least so I wouldn’t want to go through this drama each year!

That seems a bit mental and only kicks the can down the road. If the child is ready for that next step let them take it. No point in risking them becoming bored in school or nursery.
If a child isn't ready by all means defer but lack of holidays together is no a reason to defer esp as there is no guarantee next year will be any better.

Honestly the holiday leave policy is very discriminatory if you have to book in whilst on shift and that could mean you don’t get any holiday when you want it. It should be fair to all.

I completely understand where you're coming from in terms of having to work opposite each other and having no family time. Unfortunately for many years me and my husband had to do that and it absolutely sucked! We were like passing ships, one of us was on earlys while the other worked lates and I had to work weekends but we were lucky enough to have one weekend day off a week together, the rest of the time it was passing each other and it was hard but we just made our holiday time matter when we had it. Atleast the children are young enough you could pull the eldest out of school and book an off peak holiday for some quality time together. We're very fortunate now the kids are old enough to watch themselves for a few hours while we work during hols so it's not so bad we both work more reasonable hours but still opposite but actually see each other in the evenings now. Don't feel like you're a bad mum, unfortunately circumstances force us to work and find childcare too when it's not always possible but you can make the little bit of family time you have count that's what we did. And I fully understand being a bit upset about not getting any term time holiday, you're not asking anyone to give up their current holidays booked or change them but you're still entitled to feel sad about the circumstances you find yourself. If I was you I'd keep an eye on the calendar incase anyone needs to switch a holiday in which case you could jump in and switch (I have done this many times in my work when a fully booked week becomes available).

When I had to cover school holidays for my sons I used to advertise for short term help. Over the years I had a newly qualified teacher waiting to start her first job, a nanny who arranged some cover when her employers were away and a local mother who brought her little girl with her. They were all excellent.

I think that sounds awful and not at all family friendly.

I have a large team and at the beginning of each holiday year, September (we have ratios of how many at which grade can be off) I sit down with the team and ask them to work out what they need and when. With me, the team prioritises who needs leave in the summer holidays due to childcare. In my team of 18, it's usually only those with child care responsibilities/partners who are teachers who want time in the school holidays because it's the most expensive time to take a/l.

It must be an absolute juggle for working parents with kids at school! My best friend has had the same issue trying to get holidays then paying through the nose for holiday clubs etc. I used to work at a private nursery and even though some children were starting school in August (Scotland) they came to nursery right through the summer holidays. No harm in asking if you can do this. A childminder might be better if she's shy and not into a crowd of kids? My wee ones only one and I dread this issue already 🤣 x

So the Annual leave calendar went up a couple of weeks ago and you have only just bothered to try to book??
You aren’t happy to consider alternate shifts because you won’t be together much as a family?
You seem to be wanting everyone to move mountains for your holiday (change their dates etc) but won’t give up anything yourself?
I rest my case!

This makes me so angry. Women are more than half the population but work is arranged around what fits men - who mainly do not do the caring work or domestic work that women do. Our work is not counted as either valid or as part of GDP but without it the economy could not run!

You may get lucky speaking to a colleague. Before I had kids I took NO interest in when school holidays were so just booked time off whenever. If I hadn’t booked anywhere away and someone asked me to swap or change then I wouldn’t gladly do so.

I feel for you, holidays have always been a total bunfight everywhere I have worked. I’m afraid I’m one of the annoying people pouncing to book all my year’s leave as soon as the booking window opens! My youngest only has one year of school left so hopefully I’ll be able to relax about it once he’s left, as there’s no way I’ll be booking time off in school holiday time when I don’t have to.

Is it possible to ask your boss (or whoever manages the time off), ideally in writing, why the system has changed?
Something along the lines of

'Hi XXX, I came into work today ready to book my main 2 weeks of annual leave following the system we've used for the last few years, but was disappointed to come in and find that all the dates I'd been considering have already been booked off to maximum capacity, and that a new system appears to be in use. I was hoping to book off XX/XX/XXXX - XX/XX/XXXX, which is in the school holidays, but did have some flexibility and would have been willing to book off [any other two weeks in the summer/ other suggested dates etc]. I followed the instructions of YYYYY, I went to look at the new calendar and could see/ was informed that all the school holidays are already fully booked off, and there is no time I'm able to book off whilst my little one will be off school.

I'd like to know why the system has suddenly changed with no warning? In the past there was always a short period where everyone booked a fortnight, and then the calendar opened for other days off too, which seemed to work well, and ensure the 'prime' leave was split evenly. I was quite shocked to find the diary with everyone's full leave in, as I was on annual leave when the annual leave diary for next year opened it wasn't possible for me to put my request in any earlier. Please do let me know if there's any chance of flexibility in the current system, as I'm now in a position of totally changing my holiday plans for the year. Please also let me know if this new system will be used going forward, and if so, what year the diary for the year after (2026-2027) will be available, so I can ensure I'm working and able to enter my leave that day'

I think you mean ‘would’ gladly do so’ ?

I agree.

My employer has a system where the people who took leave in school holidays last year go to the back of the queue for time off in holidays for the next one, which makes it pretty fair. And people in some roles work term-time only contracts.

I've known colleagues have all sorts of arrangements for child care if they can't get leave in the holidays: complex patchworks of grandparents and other friends/family members, some periods of WFH, holiday clubs/nursery and one booked a nanny for the couple of weeks that she and her partner both had to work.

And it's not unfair for those without school-age children to have leave in school holidays. They may have partners who work in education and can't have leave in term time, or be having holidays with friends/family who are similarly restricted.

It's not first come first serve where I am. We put in our requests then the line managers discuss it and try and work out the fairest options for all.

Our holidays run April to April, so with the financial year. If you want to book a big holiday or something that requires a deposit far in advance we ask our line manager, they have a look, check with the rest of the team if they were planning anything specific for the same time and go from there.

It's very fair, it's very kind, if people are off when someone else is requesting holiday the managers wait until the others are back before giving a definite answer.

I am in a small team now, so it works well, but even when I was in a much bigger team the line managers still took down everyone's requests for peak holiday periods like summer holidays and Christmas and would work out the fairest options for all.

I feel so sorry for the OP. That's bad and mean management.

Gosh sounds so old fashioned doing it manually.

I'm been a line manager a long time (also in a shift environment for a lot of it) and always operated a policy that I asked for leave requests for holiday periods as early as possible and if you had the 'popular' spots last year then you were 2nd in line in the current year, so that everyone had a turn and it was as fair as I could be. Quite apart from summer, this was particularly because lots of people would want Christmas Eve off to travel to family for Christmas and it was one of our busiest nights so I could only let a very small number take it. Ditto the day after Boxing Day. Once everyone 'entitled' to the popular slots had theirs booked, any leave days left were literally drawn out of a hat so that I couldn't be accused of favouritism. Maybe suggest this to your boss for the future?

I'd also suggest they change the policy and allow being able to book further ahead into the next leave year. For example this year Easter is late so it seems bonkers to only be able to book Easter leave on 1 April!

@Ilikeadrink14You are right. Blooming autocorrect!

Don't take it to heart OP. From their user names, I can see that the posters who have been snippy and mean to you on this thread, do this to lots of people on other threads. One particular poster has never posted a kind or empathetic comment on any thread that I have seen.

If its this August can your eldest stay in nursery