Did you have a preference on the sex of your baby?

[tearosetulip]

Just curious really, before children I wanted all girls if I could have chose but I now have a daughter and a son and I can’t believe I had a preference for girls only! It seems a lot of my friends have a preference for daughters too. Did you have a preference before you had your children?

Nope. No preference either time. I had dd first and people always asked if I was hoping for a boy next time. I genuinely didn't care. As it turns out I have one of each but I love them because they're my kids. Not because I wanted a boy and a girl

I'd always hoped for one of each, but would have opted for girls over boys, I think because you get to relive a bit more of your girl days with a daughter, or toys/groups, and also I think daughters overall more likely to have a stronger relationship as an adult.
I know this doesn't always work out like that, but more often than not.

No preference. I think parents who want a child of their own sex because of gendered ideas about ‘what girls/boys are like’ and desire for a mini-me are tragic.

No because it would have been pointless too

No preference whatsoever, and we didn't find out what we were having until the birth. We have a DS and he's perfect.

Yes and I was disappointed both times for opposite reasons! Only for the split second of finding out at 20 weeks mind, I'm over it now 🤣

No absolutely not and in my opinion I find it quite disgusting (and I don’t use that word lightly) to have a preference.

Yes I did. First time I wanted a girl and second time I wanted a boy, I was very lucky to get it my way both times. Although, if I had another child I would be happy either way.

Sounds so ridiculous but I had a dream when I was pregnant with my first, cradling a baby girl in my arms. From that point on, I wanted a girl, second time around there was no dream, just always wanted a girl and a boy like my mum and dad.

Wouldn’t have been disappointed if things didn’t work out my way though.

Yes, I would have liked a girl. As it happened I had two boys and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Why ? Genuinely curious.

Not always. Db is way closer to dm than I am. They're so alike.
I was always closer to df. It is definately dependant on personality.

First dv I wanted a boy but wasn't bothered if it was a girl, I had a girl. Second dc I definitely wanted a boy because I had a girl, got my boy. Third dc I wanted a girl and got a boy, was a bit disappointed but soon got over it and now can't imagine it any other way many years later.

I would have been happy with either but I felt more confident bringing up a girl, my mum did not provide a good parenting blueprint

I really didn't want a girl and that's the main reason I didn't find out what I was having.

Love having one of each.

That's interesting, I felt more confident bringing up a boy, because dm and I had a dysfunctional relationship, and I would have been so scared i'd mess it up. Given the opportunity though, I do think i'd have tried to do all of the things I would have wanted, we are different people, and history wouldn't have repeated. Maybe I would have gotten the mother/daughter relationship I always wanted and never got with my own dm, who knows.

I was close to df, so wonder if this was why. Anyway I have boys, and couldn't be happier. I think it is personality, and I couldn't be closer to a daughter than I am to my sons.

Boy and a girl would have been nice, I had 2 boys and I'd never change that for the world. Love them both so much and they've grown up to be great men

No. Preferences always seem to be based on lazy sexist stereotypes.

Yeah fair enough. And again just my opinion but if you want children you should just want them to be born healthy. That’s it. No ulterior motives.

Wanting a specific sex means (again to me) that either there are romanticised views of one sex or another and/or leads to disappointment.

We all know it’s a complete crap shoot so you should go into it knowing that you have control over it.

Often on MN you see threads about women who wanted a girl for example and dreamed of having a girl etc etc or were disappointed with having a boy because they wanted a girl. That feels selfish to me. My love for my children is unconditional and not based on what sec they are (or aren’t).

Wanted a boy first time round and we had our son.

Hoped for a second boy as got soooo many clothes and boy bits so logistically would've been helpful. Had girl vibes my whole pregnancy and we got our head round the 'fact' she was a girl, referred to the bump as a girl and out popped our 2nd boy which we were super pleased with.

I'm really not a girly girl and love having boys. I'm not sure I'm done having kids (husband is 100% done but happy to revisit the idea again in a few years time) but I'm starting to think that if we had a girl after 2 boys it may change the dynamic.

I grew up in a family of all girls with no dad around and my mum, sister and I are all very close so that gave me a preference for a girl as I didn’t know anything else.

Had to have IVF for my baby and didn’t find out the sex until birth. Was convinced I was having a boy but out popped DD. Would have been happy with either as very thankful to have a healthy baby but was happy to have a daughter.

gender preference and disappointment is quite common and normal. you can’t help how you feel but some people lack empathy and understanding unfortunately and this leads them to making nasty judgments

First child I really wanted a girl and experienced gender disappointment when I found out I was expecting a boy.

however I got over it and of course adore my son.

second child I didn’t mind either way and had a wonderful daughter

When discussing with my husband at the outset my preference was for girls (strong association of being bullied by boys as a kid, plus always generally get along better with women) and his was for boys (his own father was abusive and he wanted a do over of the father son relationship).
We had 2 girls, and I felt sad for him, but couldn't face having another to try for a boy. I do 90% of the parenting, always wondered if he'd have pushed himself to be more engaged with boys. Kind of glad we didn't have one of each though and end up in a favouritism situation.

Would’ve liked to experience both as I’m one of three ( girl, boy, girl) but had two daughters. Was delighted none the less

You’d also love having two the same - just saying