Can we have a 'My children are driving me insane' support group please?

[JoshandJamie]

I was about to post about yet another behaviour issue with my sons and then I thought - no. While I know everyone will have some great advice, it's not advice I need. It's commiserations.

We start each day with a cup of milk and each day they have the exact same argument about who's having which cup. And thus commences the day - interspersed with pooing in pants, peeing in pants, constant bickering, not listening, wasting food,tantrums, pushing boundaries - until they go to bed and I am frazzled.

So if anyone else out there needs a place to vent / have a virtual hug or glass of wine / feel like you're not alone in being a mother on the edge, then sign up here.

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I am trying to remember the rows I've had today.
Sorry, can't, too many, they drive me mad!!
Oh yes... the long spoon, 8yo fighting with 3yo over a spoon at breakfast.
And so on, and so on, and so on...

You have my sympathies mloo. I just keep thinking - this phase will pass. But then they're into the next one....

can i join?

Oh let me join - otherwise I am putting them on ebay

Welcome all.

I've just had to deal with a 4 year old who was promised a comic for doing really well at swimming lessons only to have said child unable to make up his mind as to which comic he wanted, resulting in the shopkeeper eventually telling him off (he had somewhat destroyed the magazine rack), which then triggered an almighty tantrum (we had at this point chosen a comic but he was still changing his mind), we drove home with him screaming 'take the comic back' all the way, until I said that he wasn't going to be getting it anyway, at which point the scream changed to 'i want my comic' and then 'i want chocolate'.

And it continued thus......

I was on the bus today - hot and crowded with my 5 month old in the buggy and my 3 year old - managed to get a seat for my daughter - when we were getting off she started screaming hysterically. Thinking she had hurt herself I was being all supportive - but no she had left her twig on the seat - she had a tantrum all the way home.....welcome to my life

I feel your pain janx. Been there, lost the twig and the plot.

I went for an interview today - job I really wanted. Recieved phonecall to offer me the job and ds2's friend wandered in. I pointed at the door in an 'out now!!' gesture. He ran off and told ds 1 and 2. The three of them then proceeded to run in the room, laugh, run out, while I tried to talk calmly to this man whilst madly gesticulating at them to GET OUT. This went on for about 5 minutes. I was not a happy mummy.

Stones, inthis family. Or more specifically, driveway gravel. They Collect them up, carry in plastic bags (swing bags around for good affect inside the house -- who do you suppose will get to tidy that mess up?).
When kids seem to have forgotten about the stones, I dump back on driveway. Only THIS time, DD remembered.

DD Went ballistic about her precious stones I had dumped.

I pointed out to her exactly where I dumped them, DD cries "But I can't tell which ones are the ones I collected earlier!" Er, yeah, no kidding...

Hello, posted here about dd1 constantly wanting to eat but mloo pointed me in this direction so can I join?
to add to my gripes, today DD1 did a poo in the potty after stripping down herself after getting up but now screams and wails every time I suggest taking putting knickers on instead of a nappy.
Begged me the other day for a pretty bed, bought one this morning, that she chose, with pink (yuck) butterflies all over it and then refused to get in the fecking bed as it was the wrong way round.

Oh, and this morning we went to a friends, the whole way there she screamed and wailed 'I don't want to go, I don't like him, pleeeheeeheeeheeease'
Get there, and she runs up the path and is happy as larry for the morning.

Ooh, that's so much better!

Oooh, can I play? My dd is being an utter wretch at the moment, influenced in no small part by the very recent arrival of her baby brother I'm sure.

Was on the phone today when there was a chilling shriek of anguish followed by gulping sobs. I dropped the phone and raced to the hall expecting to find a severed limb at the very least. But no. DP had hoovered up a star shaped silver sequin and she could see it through the perspex cover on the dyson.

She's also taken against dp being allowed a wee. He tries to sneak off to the bathroom but she notices and screams "NO DADDY WEE NO DADDY WEE", races to the bathroom and slams the loo shut and sits on it howling until he goes away. (This doesn't make me laugh at all. Honest. )

Stones & twigs also not allowed in our house, doesn't stop them trying it on, though.
I find gravel chips in Dd's room and I try to clear them out -- cue tantrums about how she's going to make nests or crafts or sumwat with them.

DS3 had a screaming fit because DS1 put on the wrong shoes this morning (actually, that was useful, because DS1 wouldn't notice his own footwear if it jumped up and bit him).

But then DS1 was having MEGA-tantrums last week about school trip he didn't want to go on yesterday. DS1 got banned from school disco and all (further tantrums) because of his ridiculous initial outbursts about the trip ...... then we stopped discussing the trip & he went on it without any fuss after all.
SIGH.

So glad I am not alone. It is like House of Tiny Tearaways here.

We have had sandpit sand in the lounge, a broken plate, constant fights, rejected dinners...

I was trying to do a bit of gardening and one of the little sods tipped a spadeful of soil down the back of my jeans while I was crouching down!!!

Commiserations offered and accepted.

It's good to have a thread with no advice, actually.

I have had days recently where I feel I have been losing my sanity. Last week I picked DS2 (8) up from a club at school, with DS1 (11) in tow and DD (3). Despite the purchase of comics (which they ended up not having), I had to line them all up against a wall at least four times on the 15 min walk home, to stop the boys teasing and hurting each other or to stop DD screaming at DS2 for invading her space and doing stupid things to annoy her, just because he wants her attention.

I got in the door, picked up the phone and said to DH 'come home now or I will kill one of them'.

And he did.

i love it when we can all just have a moan about it all ...and supernanny isn't looking on and tutting disapprovingly!!!

what makes me laugh is all the fuss there is about 'having a baby'...and from where i am sitting now...with 3 boys age 14,11 & 8....i see that the 'baby years' were NOTHING as compared to my life now!!!!

thank god we don't know what we are letting ourselves in for...otherwise the world's population would shrink !

Morning the 'going quietly insane mothers club'.

We had a reasonably smooth morning out of the house - only one bowl of cereal and two pieces of toast wasted, 2 year old refused to get dressed so went to nursery in PJs and there was a fight about who was going to get dropped off first at nursery - but besides that, pretty smooth.

Now I have a whole luxurious day to work my arse off - but without any children underfoot. The peace and tranquility is lovely.

Ds who is 3.5 went into meltdown yesterday evening as dh and he were playing "rugby" in the garden and dh ddn't throw the ball onto the exact blade of grass that ds had pointed at.

And dreadful mother that I am, he had to go back to bed at early o'clock this morning when he decided it was time to start the day as Mummy and Daddy were still Trying To Be Asleep. Cue another strop whereby you would be forgiven for assuming that I had taken his cuddly rabbit and torn its fluffy sodding limbs off. I might just consider it...

But the most infuriating thing is the selective hearing/ignoring.

Me: DS would you like porridge or weetabix for breakfast/we are going to the park now please come and put your shoes on with me/ please do not throw tat big hard toy at daddys head, he is quite precious and we would all be sad if he got hurt

DS: (silence)

Me: (Repeats same a bit louder)

DS: (silence)

Me: Ds did you hear me sweetie? You need to listen to mummy when she is talking.

DS: Whaaaaaat??????? Waaaaaaaaah!!!!!! (throws self on floor and writhes around shrieking and groaning screwing face up like a dogs bottom)

I am not looking forward to today.

Can I join please? DD (3.6) is in a "phase" at the moment, mainly because she is soooooo tired. Light nights make her think she can sit up in bed for an hour after we put her down chatting with her toys and singing songs, which is all very sweet but the next morning she's like a bear with a sore head!

"Weetabix or toast sweetheart?"
"Nothing! NOT HUNGRYYYYYYYY!"
"You've got to eat before (pre)school, I'm making you xyz, come sit a tthe table please..."
"I DON'T WANT TO GO TO SCHOOOOOLLLLLLLL TOOODAAAAAYYYYYYYY!"
Wailing, shrieking, sulking, etc etc

Half an hour later with a bit of brekkie in her she's like an angel as if it never happened. Home from school same old, same old...

Minkus - I think boys have selective hearing from birth. It's why men don't seem to hear you when you say: can you put your dirty plate in the dishwasher instead of on top of it?

It's a genetic defect (although I think they'd argue that it's a fabulous genetic evolution).

I'm very used to one way conversations - like: what did you do at pre-school today? Silence. Who did you play with? Silence. Was it fun? Silence. And then something like: mummy, why don't dogs have wings? And you just know that your voice was mere backgrond noise as they mulled over deeper issues.