Was your child potty trained by 3?

[Cherrysherri]

I did a previous post. Really struggling potty training our 2y9mo but next weekend think I may just set a tough weekend aside and try it again

im so worried about the age thing and just went on the Eric site and got into my head

i I think it’s achievable by the time he’s 3? Around 3

But just feel so guilty that he’s over 2.5 and potty trained

anyone in the same boat or was in the same boat

Yes both day and night at bang on 2 with both kids

My three boys were all out of nappies before they were two and a half.

That was normal in the 90s, we just got on with it and did it. It usually involved staying close to home for a week, and committing to it.

A child still in nappies at three was very unusual in the 90s. I just don't buy this modern thing of waiting until they are 'ready'. It's nonsense.

Yes. My son at about two and a half and daughter a bit earlier. Both were dry within a week and at night within two. I had a false start with my daughter as I thought she was ready at two but she wasn't so waited another few months.

DD1+DD2 (twins) - one was trained by 18 months and the other not till she was bang on 2. Then DS1 wasn't trained till he was about 3 and a half - he just wasn't ready for ages. Then both of my youngest daughters were trained when they were about 2 and 3 months.

DS1 was 2 1/2 when he PT - just asked for pants one day and was done.

DS2 is 3y 4m now and absolutely nowhere near ready. He has a potty around, I ask daily if he wants a wee on it, he tries but has never actually done anything yet. Seems to have no clue when he's weeing/weed.

Has started to tell me, though not reliably, that he's pood so, ... baby steps.... we keep trying without over stimulation.....

Nan tried potty training my dd when she was 2.5 she clearly wasn't ready and I told her that but one Saturday she decided to traumatise her trying to force her on the potty she came home distressed and it pissed me right off put dd off for months while my mother prattled on in the background about her never being ready for nursery I just waited for a warm sunny week and shoved her in the garden in pants and a dress ds was daytime dry just after two but not nighttime until four (dd did both within a few weeks) ds2 was a long drawn out process I was on board he was on board nursery were on board dad wasn't unless I was prepared to hand over my potty to him plus spare pants (and take the wet ones back) he only had them a few hours a week and found it "too much trouble" 🙄 he ended up being 3.5 too but I think he would have got it sooner had he not been messed around

Nope. One was 3.5 and the other was almost 4.

No

Ds1 was 3y 4m and ds2 3y 2m.

I had attempted it a couple of times when ds1 was 2 but it was a disaster so because I was heavily pregnant we left it a few months.

When we were successful with both of them we stayed in for a week and they'd cracked it after a few days. Never had any problems since apart from the odd accident.

The oh crap book is good for methods but I ignored all the stuff about the "essential window"

It's totally normal for 2-3 year olds to be in nappies still op don't worry. As long as they are out of nappies before school.

Funnily enough the friends I have who stressed about getting their kids out of nappies at 2 were the ones dealing with accidents several times a day for months afterwards.

I remember the 90s and kindly, you're talking nonsense. The being ready thing is not new. You cannot take anecdotal opinion and throw it around arrogantly as fact. Well you can I suppose but you sound judgy and clueless.

😂 I was born in 1987 and my mum was told to get me out of nappies by the age of 2. I was an absolute nightmare apparently. Eventually she gave up and tried again when I was 3 and I got it easily.

So maybe it wasn't as unusual as you think, people just didn't want to admit to it

Yes, all by 30 months.

Toilet training has slipped in age overtime though. I agree with you @DramaAlpaca & disagree with @Inkypot. I was a nursery teacher from 1989. At the time, to begin school nursery, the rule was ‘aged 3 and toilet trained’.
We had 104 children in the school nursery, each year, all toilet trained.
The rules changed in later years and we couldn't insist on children being toilet trained but even then it was occasionally 1 or two children who weren't.

I worked there for 15 years, so over 1500 ( and that discounts the 76% turnover per year) , 3 year olds, with maybe 10 children out of them, during that time, who required toilet training support.

@Inkypot I'm not judgy and clueless at all. Well, maybe a bit judgy of lazy parents who can't be bothered to toilet train their children, but clueless - absolutely not. It's much easier to train children between 2 and 2.5 when they are in the 'wanting to please' stage. But you have to commit and put in the effort. It was easier back then though, as more of us were stay at home parents. These days for most families it would mean one parent taking a week off work.

My ds is 21 now but when he was due to start nursery there was a rule that the children had to be potty trained so it put a bit of pressure on parents, I remember lots of panicking at baby groups!

ds was really quick to toilet train and we used the Cheerios method, he hardly spoke a word until he was 3 though and was diagnosed with ASD when he was 8.

my dd is now 13 and there was no such pressure when she was little but she was so quick at everything and was talking in proper sentences by around 16-18 months but she took forever to toilet train properly ( was dry day and night from almost 3 but refused to poo in a toilet until she was 6 ) and she was diagnosed with ASD when she was 12. Every child is different and it’s so easy to compare, I did it too. They all get there in the end.

please try not to worry or feel guilty, you’re not a bad mum at all so don’t ever think that. Let him take the lead, take him shopping for underwear ( maybe his favourite characters? ) and don’t put too much pressure on. It will happen.

All 3 of mine dry by 2. My first 2 wore Terry nappies though so if they wet they felt wet. 3rd DC wore mixture of terries and disposable nappies. Still dry by 2 though. I think babies in disposable nappies don't feel wet when they were so don't make the same connection Sca baby in a Terry nappy. My DD was dry day and night by 18 months. She didn't like feeling wet.

I've got 5 boys and none of them were dry by 3. Ds3 was my earliest, dry at 3 years 10 months. Ds4 was the latest aged 5.

We had an absolute nightmare with ds1 with everyone from relatives to professionals sticking their par in with opinions. Against my better judgement we started at 3.5 and he was mostly reliable in the day by 4 years and 3 months. With DS2 I just said we are leaving it until he wants to try. We started just after his 4th birthday and he was dry in a week.

Dd1 just over 3
Dd2 2 and a half
Ds 8 yrs and still in pull ups at night at 14 (he is disabled)
For those saying 'they were all trained by 3 in the 80s/90s etc'... my mum used to run a playgroup and work in primary schools in the 70s and 80s, she said although kids would all arrive in pants, they were often not actually toilet trained... having loads of accidents and sometimes having to wear 'rubber' pants (I don't think they were actually rubber... just waterproof!) I remember the vast 'knicker cupboard' outside the heads office in primary school for kids who had constant accidents ( primary early 70s).

We potty trained our son at 2y 9m and it was a fairly quick process, as we'd had several failed attempts earlier so he was familiar with what he needed to do.

He's currently just turned 3 and we still have occasional accidents (mainly poo) but they're very infrequent. One or two a month at most.

All of our NCT friends trained around the same time, some a little earlier and some a little later. Some are still having accidents regularly so aren't "fully" trained at 3. Of other similar aged kids I know from playgroups etc, I don't know any who were trained before 2.5 and some who aren't at 3+.

Yes, DD around 2.5. DS just a little before that. After he was 2 though.

Actively ‘trained’ my DS.. it was really really hard work. Only really did it as he was behind on speech and I saw others his age were dry by then and I felt like I was failing him.

DD in the other hand (eldest) we tried to train once at around 12/18 months and gave up after a day or two. Decided to wait until she was ready.
2.5 came along, her younger cousin who’s fully trained came for a sleepover. As soon as she left the next morning DD said “I want to go to the toilet like a big girl like cousin now” - we took her nappy off there and then and she’s been dry day and night since. I am baffled honestly 😂

but yes, for DS it was hard work. It took a lot from us, there was a good amount of accidents and it felt like he was getting it in the short amount of time that every book promises if you stick to a strict routine. But it did eventually work.

stick at it, as much as I do sort of agree that people should wait until the kids are ready, I think that part of the problem in why so many kids are starting school in nappies😫 even if that does happen, at least you know you gave it a good go and didn’t give up.

Both of mine were potty trained at 2 years and a couple of months but did have the odd accident, usually whilst they learned that they needed to pipe up a bit sooner than when they were bursting! One was dry at night immediately (again the odd accident very rarely but not worth a return to nappies) and the other was 4.5 before being dry at night.

First one, no - took her til she was about 3.5 and we had a year of accidents. Was awful But mostly through lockdown.
Youngest - yes she picked it up really quickly

Four boys --- all fully potty trained by 3 apart from odd accidents.

I don’t think toilet training readiness is a thing. If they can understand simple instructions and communicate that they need the toilet then they are ready.

Dc1 was 18 months and DC2 was 21 months - in both cases timing dictated by my annual leave. Took about 3 days and no accidents afterwards. I didn’t try to train night dryness though and my boy was 4.5 whereas my girl was 2.5.

Just set aside a few days and do the Oh Crap method with him OP.

Mine was just before she turned 3 - we tried around 2y8m, but she wasn't ready and just getting upset if we tried to take her nappy off. I think around 2y10m we started having nappy off days of we were at home - but didn't do the whole 'stay at home for a week' thing. Within a few weeks, we suggested going without nappies at all (except at night) - and she was happy with that. She still has occasional accidents (3y 2m) but not many.

Honestly, because we waited, it was so easy and more like a natural transition than 'training'.

Started DS1 day after his 2nd birthday, he was reliably dry by the time DS2 was born just under 2 months later.

DS2 was done around the same age

They both wore pull ups at night for a while.

Yes. But it took a solid 6 month, maybe more. And he occasionally has an accident if he got over excited or absorbed in an activity or tired. For many children it's not 3 days and dry, they have to learn not to go in a nappy.