Son wants his ear pierced

[pinksofas]

I really don't know what to say to my 8 year old son who is begging to get his ear pierced.
His sister had hers done at 8, so I can't use his age as an excuse.
Just my personal opinion as I don't like earrings on boys but I feel like I need to give him a proper reason why he can't have it, other than "I don't like how it looks"
I've said it would be dangerous playing sports, but his sister plays sports and just tapes her earrings.
I've said that 8 year old boys don't generally have an earring, but a couple of his friends got them done over the holidays.
Am I being mean just telling him a blanket "no" because I'm the grown up and I don't like how it looks?
I would say the same for a haircut I didn't like, or clothing I didn't want him to wear. But I just feel like it's double standards as I let his sister have hers pierced.

I wish I never got mine done as a child. One of the piercings is chronically infected from not healing right

Well it is double standards, if you let your daughter have hers done you have no excuse for not letting him do you? The problem is you don’t actually have a reason except he’s a boy, which is pretty unfair tbh.

Yes it really is double standards. But I really don't like how it looks on little boys. Parenting is bloody hard.

I'd just let him get it done if you've let your DD.

Does the school allow boys with pierced ears? Ours doesn’t. There was one kid who did and he was made to wear a band aid over it.

I think my DS has occasionally asked and I have simply said “no”. My DD who is 21 doesn’t have pierced ears and does not wish to get them because she “doesn’t like metal” in her ears. So I didn’t have a precedent.

Just say "No, it's too late now they won't have time to heal, if you still want them done next year we'll get them done at the start of the summer holiday." Which is both true and means he'll probably forget

I think the start of the summer holidays is the best time to do it. Maybe say he needs to wait until next summer? He will need to take out for football as playing in leagues they do not allow taping and that season is about to start. I imagine the same for rugby and other sports.

Oh God, I'd be the exact same

I'll happily let DD do it once she wants to (if she does) and is old enough to care for the piercings responsibly.

However, I don't think I'd want my son getting it while he's a child.

My friend's 8 year old boy juts had one done and I thought it look really awful :/

I'm all for equality but there's just something so offputting about little boys with an earring.

Not really. You should just have thought about it beforehand and not let dd have her ears pierced.

That is an amazing idea about doing it at the start of the holidays next year. Hopefully he'll have forgotten by then. And I'm sure he can't remember that his sister got hers done in the middle of a school term as he was only 5 then!

I personally did not let my DC have their ears pierced until they went to secondary school. However if you let your DD have her's dome at 8, you really should allow your DS to have his done at the same age.Tudor men wore earrings!

I don't think you can say no as you allowed his sister at the same age.
By all means wait until next summer so they can heal, but I think a total No is really unfair.

I hate earrings on young boys but I think you’re going to have to let him unfortunately. I don’t particularly think earrings on primary age kids of any sex are a good idea myself.

I find this weird- lots of boys have their ears pierced? Why can't DS have his ears done if DD has?

I just really don't like it. And I know that's unfair. But if my daughter wanted a haircut I didn't like then I wouldn't allow it either.

Let him

It’s quite sexist of you. I think it’s harsh to say he can’t have it just because he’s a boy

Please don't be that parent who has different standards for sons and daughters.

Am I being mean just telling him a blanket "no" because I'm the grown up and I don't like how it looks?
I would say the same for a haircut I didn't like, or clothing I didn't want him to wear.

YABU. It's not your body. He can look how he wants, his hairstyle, clothing, jewelry is not.your choice. My 3yo is wearing yellow nail varnish. Is it what I would choose? No. But he likes it and it makes no difference to me at all.

You get to override them in decisions about their health and wellbeing. You can't choose sweets for dinner, you can't decide if you go to school or not. But you can cut your hair as short as you like or don't cut it. Wear jewelry, or don't.

This is such a shitty attitude. They're not dolls for you to dress up how you think looks good.

When my oldest asked at that age, I said no. My youngest asked at that age I said no too.

My oldest has never asked again and my youngest has lost interest.

I don't like it on young boys, but that's my opinion and I would never say anything to people I work with, who's boys have earrings at that age and younger.

I’m with you. My dd’s had theirs done, I wouldn’t let my ds as I just don’t like boys with ears done either. I just kept fobbing him off, just told him outright I didn’t like it. So he never got them done. Years later he thanked me for not letting him get them done as he didn’t like the look of them later down the line 😂😂

If you've allowed your DD at the same age, don't be a hypocrite and not allow your son.

Ffs, does it matter what you think how it looks? Dd vs Ds?!

I've got no issues with him doing more feminine activities. He has nail varnish some days, he's worn a tutu on occasion when dressing up, he lets his sister put make up and face masks on him, but I just don't like the look of earrings on boys.

I’ve seen boys that age with pierced ears. Looks ok however I’m iffy about being done under 12 as I’ve seen lots of kids getting infections or reactions.