GP’s manner over babies vaccines

[SLiath]

I just had a voicemail from a woman at my GP’s practice. The only way to describe her tone is condescending. She asked if I had a chance to speak with “hubby” about getting immunisations for my two twins. I am a single mother. I had the first round which made them very poorly and declined the second for the time being I was concerned for their health. They were born premature and we spent 5 weeks in NICU so didn’t want anything impacting their feeding. She then stated with a very snarky tone that if I was not having them immunised I need to go to the practice to sign a form because the “child health surveillance team keeps emailing her.” I have had some hesitance to get the vaccines due to some mistrust in the NHS. This voicemail has now increased that trust. Has anyone had a similar experience?

Get your DC vaccinated

She's doing her job. 'Some mistrust about the NHS' will be soon evaporate should either of your DC require any sort of care when the contract any of the horrible diseases that vaccination can prevent.

This.

What do you mean by the first round made them very poorly? In what way? Was medical attention needed?

The diseases the vaccine protects against will effect there more than the vaccine. Look up what the vaccine protects against and consider what they'd do to your babies.

She may have been abrupt but she's doing her job.

I'm surprised the NICU team didn't talk to you about the importance of vaccinations. Our NICU community nurse did before DD1 was discharged. Do you still have contact with the NICU community team? We had a contact number to ask any follow up questions we had. If so, I'd chat to them about how to best manage vaccinations and feeding if you are worried.

I understand your concerns, especially if your DTs were very little - DD1 was below the 0.4th centile when she was having her vaccs and every bad feed stressed me out so much. But babies that have been poorly or prem are also so so vulnerable and getting them vaccinated is the best thing you can do to keep them well.

If the tone from the GP was genuinely out of order, then of course you can make a complaint to the practice. But I would focus on getting your DCs protected first and then see how you feel.

Wondering this too. Children do often feel unwell for a day after their jags.

Your feelings regarding vaccination shouldn't be swayed by the manner of a random receptionist.

Presumably your twins are still under consultant care; could you speak to them for reassurance regarding the specific circumstances of your twins?

In general, vaccines are absolutely worth doing, even if they provoke a temporary setback in feeding; they can be lifesaving. My own DS was in ICU for a month when he was born and his vaccinations made his reflux flare horribly, which made his already difficult feeding nightmarish, but we never considered not completing the program.

You are doing them a huge disservice by not having them fully complete their vaccinations and will never forgive yourself if they go blind/ become infertile from a disease they should have been protected from.

I would try not to take her tone personally.

Lots of people get tone wrong. The NHS probably isn't giving her much training in that area. You need to make an important decision about your babies and it shouldn't depend on a woman getting her tone wrong. Think about them and don't focus on her.

Hope they do well in future.

This. They won't feed either if they catch some horrible disease. Vaccinations are safe and much better tolerated than the real pathogen which can kill them.

Well, they’d be in for a lot more than a 5-week NICU stay should they catch a completely preventable illness their parent wouldn’t vaccinate them against ‘due to mistrust in the NHS’.

Bet you’d trust the NHS if your babies needed treatment for polio.

Why do you distrust the NHS?

This. For every baby but even more so for premature baby. being unwell after vaccines is nothing compared to get a life threatening illness. Wish they'd make it more mandatory in the UK, like it is in Australia.

If the vaccine made them poorly think about what damage the actual disease protects against would do!

Unless they were poorly enough to need medical attention you're doing them a disservice. Have you not seen the news about all the whooping cough cases and baby deaths?

How old are they now (so how late would the vacs be?)
You really need to get it done asap

Even if her tone came across as a bit off on the voicemail, it's not a reason to put your DT in danger

Being a new single mother to twins who have been in NICU sounds incredibly stressful OP, it is not surprising you found it difficult when your babies were unwell following their first set of jabs and no wonder you feel sensitive to the receptionist's tone. However, as other posters have said, these jabs really are important and any side effects (usually a temperature from MenB which isn't included in the 2nd set of jabs) are completely dwarfed by how unwell your babies would be if they caught any of the illnesses they should be protected against. Vaccinations are safe, have minor short lived side effects if any and save countless lives each year. Please contact the NICU team or your own GP if you need further reassurance.

People telling you're wrong and you should do it even though you feel uncomfortable isn't going to help.

So, split the vaccines so they just have one at a time.

Also, if they're premature, go when they weigh the same as an average child having that vaccine. So the 12 month vaccines, don't go at 12 months. Go when your baby is the weight of an average 12 month old.

You're trying to do the best you can for your babies, and the best is finding a compromise that works for your children, vaccines are important but you can alter the schedule to fit your individual child better.

How poorly were they? Did they get admitted?

Babyloves has written what I'd say beautifully.

Are you getting any support from anyone to help you manage the stress and anxiety you'll feel after what you went through?

The first round made both my DC a bit under the weather and off feeds, but it’s only for a few days. I’d much rather a few days upset they won’t remember than the long term impact of catching something they weren’t vaccinated against. DC2 had his 3rd lot of vaccines 2 weeks ago, was fine after a week and has most definitely forgot all about it.

Obviously it's your choice. My daughter's teacher didn't get any 3 of her kids vaccinated. She just had to sign a form. All 3 are fine. Mind you one of them had to get one of the vaccines done when he was 6. Something was going around school and her husband suggested to get them done

Given your concerns about illness after the first vaccination and the fact the children were pre term, it might be helpful for you to speak to a doctor about why there was an issue with the first vaccine, check if they think medically that the next vaccines are ok to give, and on what schedule for best uptake. Also, if you are concerned about vaccines in general, they can provide evidence based information about advantages and disadvantages of different vaccines, and talk about the specifics for your children.

My child is immune suppressed and has been for several years. They have only just completed some of their vaccines which are normally all given by age 2, as it was more risky to give them than not at various points, particularly the live vaccines. That was specific to her heath. So for several years we have been limiting exposure to other people and relying on herd immunity, which is terrifying.

But her GP and Consultant were very helpful in listening to our concerns and giving thier advice with reasons why they were giving it and what was appropriate for her at each stage. We felt more in control of what was the best for her because we educated ourselves and took guidance from relevant professionals.

If the person for them GP practice has put you off vaccinating because of thier attitude, please report this back to the practice manager as it is likely to have an impact on multiple families, not just yours.

They're given together for a reason. For example, whooping cough alone is a really weak vaccine. However, as part of the combination of vaccines, it becomes much, much, much more effective.

You are their mother, and you know your children better than anyone else. Go with your instinct.

If they were premature, they’d potentially be in even more danger from getting those deadly illnesses 😭 please vaccinate them