Big boobs breastfeeding nightmare

[Hungus93]

I'm a mum to a beautiful three and a half week old baby girl, and currently EBF her. We've had quite a rough ride with breastfeeding to begin with as she wouldn't latch, I tried to get some support from midwives in the hospital after giving birth but didn't, however something seems to have clicked and we're doing it. It still is a nightmare though. I have really big boobs (40H), which are nowhere near being perky and have massive nipples /aureola and just can't get her to latch properly, so our feeds take a bloody long time. She's gaining weight beautifully and produces plenty of wet/dirty nappies, so looks like my supply is good enough but I'm so so tired and frustrated! Feel like giving up. I even went to see a lactation consultant and she seems to have given me some tips but they don't always work. My little one doesn't seem to want to open her mouth wide enough. Any tips? How do I not give up!

All I can remember is nipple to nose to get baby to open mouth wide enough. And it was a bloody hard slog for a while. It's all you do for about 6 weeks I remember!

At week 3 you're exhausted and the toe curling pain when they latch is awful.

She's putting on weight; good nappies so sounds all good. If you can hold her with one hand and then squeeze your nipple area into a point I found that easier..and then thrust her upward into your nipple and on I found my giant boobs were better received.

I also think a 20-30 minute each side feed is normal. It's exhausting to drink constantly and they beed a little nap along the way. If you can't see her jaw moving- then detach, burp and move to the other side? Well done for keeping going - remember every feed is a bit more magic going into her body from you!

I used to feed sometimes lying down on my side so I didn't have to support my boob as much. (And after I had my last I had a reduction!)

Ask huge boobed here and had similar struggles. A midwife basically got us going properly by grabbing my boob, squeezing it into shape and pushing it into their mouth. It worked! I did this for a while until the baby got used to latching properly. The shape might vary for your baby but don’t be scared of giving it a try and just shoving it in :)

Ask = also

Some of the feeding time may be baby just getting comfort from being attached to you rather than feeding.

I found lying on my side a comfortable position. At least you can have a bit of a rest at the same time.

As baby gets bigger it gets easier and quicker. You still have a little newborn right now and are still adjusting to what works best for you both.

You're doing great. These early days will pass quicker than you will imagine.

At the time I never thought I would think it, but I miss just being snuggled up with my baby. If I had my time again, I'd stop stressing about how long it was taking and was i doing it right and would just relax and enjoy it.

I'm also large of Nork. I was never able to bf hands-free.

I used to put a hand on the top of my breast where it meets my chest and pull up to lift the nipple and get it pointing upwards, to help with the latch, and stay like that through the feed otherwise babe would slip off.

It's hard! I read yesterday that BF is natural like walking not natural like breathing. It's a new skill to learn and thre are stumbles along the way. It takes practice. And with their little mouths it's hard. You are already doing so well.

Some thing that helped me: nose to nipple is to help baby open wide for a good latch but with big boobs it's hard to see what's going on. Breast on baby's chin can also help

Google flipple technique - ifbound it hard at first, there wasn't a long enough window

Also Google breast shaping for feeding - basically using your thumb and forefinger to shape your breast the way you'd gold a sandwich or burger, at the right angle for baby's mouth.

Kellymom is a good resource also la leche and a few on Instagram- ill send handles if you can access insta? Olivia lactation consultant and Lucy webber feeding support if you want to Google.

Do see if you can find local breastfeeding support groups. NCT run feeding cafés also. Are you still under your midwife? She or your health visitor should be able to point you in the right direction.

Are your nipples painful? What makes you think the latch is off, they are inefficient little things at that age!

Google exaggerated latch technique as this can help. Get her checked for a tongue tie, this can be why they don't open their mouth enough, seeing a cranial osteopath can help. My LO is nearly 16 weeks and still won't open his mouth properly sometimes.
You can try to roll up a muslin and put it under your breast to move your nipple up. Try a local bf support group too, some of them are amazing.

It gets a lot better as the baby’s mouth and jaw grow. Honestly - one day in a month or two you’ll just latch her on absentmindedly while chatting.

But for now, shaping the breast (hamburger style), as much real-life support as you can get (do you have a local La Leche League or Breastfeeding Network group? Go to both if you can.) and using a rolled up towel under your breast will all help.

This is exactly what I do! Now at 6 months pp I can achieve the same by using my forearm so I can browse my phone 🤣

I have the same boob issue and I've now accepted I will never be one of the mums who can bf holding their baby on with one arm (how strong are they?!) whilst strolling around the supermarket or maybe casually doing some yoga. I need to be sat down, ideally with an array of pillows for support, and since 4 months no other sources of sound or distraction 🤦🏼‍♀️

Hi there I am a midwife with 3 years of experience of volunteering in breastfeeding support groups. Firstly well done for persevering so far!!!. Lots of good advice here. However I wouldn't be recommending that youbreastfeed lying on your side until your baby is much older and can move away on her own. As you say your breasts are big. It's easy to fall asleep lying down and I have seen a baby almost suffocated because of the size of the woman's breasts and the woman not being able to see baby's nose. (I had to press the emergency bell, the baby recovered quickly and fully). I personally would try a dummy. I am aware they are not recommended until 6 weeks. However your baby is putting on weight. The fact she is not opening her mouth wide enough is telling me she is probably doing a lot of comfort feeding. There is nothing wrong with it except you are probably struggling to find time to brush your teeth, never mind have a shower. If you decide to try dummy be prepared to persevere, breadtfed babies usually try spitting them out at the beginning. Finally, in my own experience, exclusive breastfeeding becomes a lot easier compared to mix feeding after 2 months. Feeds get a lot shorter (especially if a dummy is introduced). No need to take a flask of hot water and formula when going out. No need to sterilise bottles when you come back. At night you just give your breast for 15-20 minutes and go back to sleep. Think of the cost of formula too. I think if you somehow make it till 2 months exclusively breastfeeding you will be pleased you persevered. Take each one day at a time, pace yourself, rest when you can. I hope it helps

My most recent baby is only 12 weeks old and I just realised a couple of days ago how easy feeding feels now. I have big breasts and one side is larger with a tricky flat nipple. Weeks 1-4 were the hardest stage of breastfeeding for me. It was still awkward and painful most of the time but at six weeks it got easier, then easier again at 8 weeks.

I think you just have to tell yourself it will get better with time and persevere with implementing the recommendations of your lactation consultant. It helped me to reflect on how much effort and hard work I had already put in to making breastfeeding happen. Therefore if I gave up then it would all have been for nothing. Sunk costs fallacy! If you breastfeed for 52 weeks and it takes 8 weeks to get the hang of it, you will then have 44 weeks (or 85% of the time you BF) to reap the benefits. It feels hard at the moment because IT IS hard but honestly it is worth it in the end. It’s the best at night and when out and about because you don’t have to get out of bed or think and plan like you do with bottles.

Big boobs here - I used to pinch the aureola between my first 2 fingers and support the weight of my boob with the rest of my hand. This made it much easier to direct the nipple to baby's mouth.
Putting baby on a pillow helped when they were smaller too as it reduced the distance between nipple and mouth.
I could never do hands free, or lying down feeding.

Took weeks until mine could latch every time and each feed took almost an hour. Breast compressions helped get the milk out and keep the baby awake. I was advised to cap the feeding time though. After 20+ minutes on each breast with a wake up nappy change between sides, the milk bar is closed and it's "play" then nap time.

Eventually their mouth just gets bigger and they get stronger and it gets better.

In the meantime some good Netflix series and a supply of snacks and water by the sofa helped!

Get double checked for a tongue tie. We had weeks of me watching every video under the sun.(this video is excellent https://globalhealthmedia.org/videos/breastfeeding-attachment/ )

I tried flipple technique, shaping the breast, all the positions and she just wouldn’t open wide enough.

Turns out she was tongue tied (diagnosed at 9 weeks).

The tell tale was that she couldn’t form a good latch on my finger.

She was gaining weight fine and clearly getting enough milk, it just hurt!

Post tongue tie being sorted it took a couple of weeks, but we’re in a really good place now.

@Elephantsareace totally off topic but nowhere near enough people use nork to describe their breasts. It's one of my favourite words for any part of my body!

Try rugby hold.

I don't think this is to do with big boobs. If your baby isn't latching properly see a breastfeeding consultant try your local playgroup, not, or other.

It may be indication of a tongue tie or tight jaw. But first get an advisor to check feeding position.

Sorry, don't want to hijack the thread but can I ask how long after your last you waited before the reduction? My youngest is 9 months and still breastfeeding but I'm hoping to get a reduction and uplift done when she stops.

I'm very lucky that they have a lactation consultant in my health board. She got me to use a makeshift boob sling using a stretchy cotton scarf and only feed in a biological/laid back position. I was sceptical at first, and it wasn't very dignified using the scarf to hold my boob up, but it did work and I fed my daughter to 22 months.

Please be careful this webinar isn't put on by the formula industry. Suspect so if they suggest buying bottles or sterilising equipment "just in case ". As a midwife with 3 years of experience in breastfeeding support groups I always refer mums to Global Health Media breastfeeding videos. It's a collection of short videos, one can nip and out as necessary. They also come in many different languages https://globalhealthmedia.org/topic/breastfeeding/

For the first few months I had to grab my breast with my hand in a C shape and kid of squash it to make a boob sandwich. That made it much easier for baby to latch.

Keep going, before long baby's mouth will get bigger and it will all get a lot easier. This is the really hard bit. Once you're out the other side it will be so much easier.