How do I get my MIL to stop commenting on my sons accent?

[Insertpenguin]

I live with my husband and son in Essex where I have lived all my life. My husband is from Bristol but chose to moved to Essex of his own free will.

We see my in laws maybe twice a year. And it seems like every time we see them they make some sort of comment about my 5 year olds accident. And it’s not “awh his accents cute” it’s “no that’s not how you say that word you say it like this!” “Talk properly” “Who taught you to talk?? Have you been getting elocution lessons from enter cockney here”

Maybe I’m being needlessly sensitive? But my MIL has to comment on it every time and I don’t want him to think there’s something wrong with him. He’s obviously going to pick up an Essex accent because that’s what we all sound like except his dad.

So I know when we see them again she’ll do it again, how should I respond? I feel like I need to say something about it because it’s really annoying me now.

'Looks like Nana's got a brand new combine harvester ooh aah ooh are'.

<duck face>

'See, it is really mean to keep banging on about accents, so maybe just give it a fucking rest?'

You know what it’s is very very tempting to do exactly that haha

Offer to send your MIL to elocution classes so she can learn how to speak properly?

Pot, kettle.

And I say that as someone with a very strong Somerset accent.

Just ask her outright if she plans on making the same boring comment every. fucking. time. If so, you may have to reconsider Essex and move somewhere with a better accent. Ireland. Jamaica. Mars.

My child picked up a Liverpool accent while we lived there, and MIL also appeared unable to refrain from making comments. It's frustrating, and the child can't exactly help it. I feel your pain.

In the end we had to be quite blunt to MIL, and explain that we were happy that our child was confident enough to speak, and we didn't want to smash their self-esteem.

Tell her she's being rude and to stop. She has no right to be a twat to her grandchild. Put your foot down and stop letting her get away with it. Your child deserves better.

I agree I need to put my foot down. I’m really timid in general and have tried to avoid conflict but I need to stand up for him 100%

It could be worse. It could be Scouse!

Say “accents are endearing, rudeness is not”

My dad is Scottish and my first son spoke with a RP accent - I just said "Nobody chooses their accent and I remember getting bullied at school for how I spoke, so let's leave it there." It was enough to stop him.

I love a Scouse accent! It always sounds very friendly to me.

Bristol is the worst accent in the world

Sorry Bristolians

I genuinely think you're going to have to do something like this for her to get the point as she sounds thick

That's so rude

Also rude

I never understood why it was deemed acceptable to tell people they hate their accent. You wouldn't do it if it were a non British accent presumably

What words do they think he is pronouncing incorrectly? Unless he's doing the south east thing of not pronouncing th then they should be told to leave him alone.

yes the f instead of th but I do it too it’s how people around him talk so he’s going to pick it up it’s hard not to. I pronounce things correctly back to him but I won’t say no no that’s wrong

She picks up on it as it resonates with her as she sees him so infrequently. Your DH just needs to speak to her before their next visit.

I wouldn’t say she’s thick just very opinionated. I’ve had a few little run ins with her and my fil over stuff over the years

'Well I am not too keen on the sound of your voice but at least I am not rude enough to bring it up every time you speak.'

Even if you only sit there with a smug smile thinking it.

I would actually get dh to address it with her.

Maybe say you know, if you carry on insulting your grandson and his mother, he's not going to grow up to enjoy spending time with you. You might want to think about whether you want to carry on being rude.

I’m going to ask him to say something but we find they often take no notice of either of us. My FIL in particular ignores or talks over him.

I’d tell her that everyone has an accent and hers isn’t the ‘correct’ one!