My 19 month old is getting increasingly harder to go outside with, I’ve struggled to go out alone with her since the very start of the toddler age but it’s gotten worse and worse. She will stay in her stroller for around 10-20 minutes and then she will want to get out, I usually give her some snacks which lasts another 10 minutes and there is nothing else I can do. When I carry her she won’t sit on my hip and will arch her back to get down, but once she’s down she won’t hold my hand so I put her on a reign but it doesn’t help as she just runs straight for the road and into other peoples gardens. I don’t drive which is a big part on why this is getting me down, I want to enjoy going outside but I can’t, it’s extremely stressful. I feel scared to go outside incase something bad happens as I just can’t control her enough sometimes. I’m a single mum and only ever go out with her dad, i left him due to abuse on his part to me and when I talk to him about this he doesn’t seem to understand the problem and accuses me of negligence because of my struggle (he refuses to go out alone with her) I fully understand how important it is to explore the world, I hate staying inside and I want what’s best for my daughter, I just can’t cope. is there anyway to improve this situation?
I hope I really haven’t come across as a horrible mom, i just really need help and at my wits end, thank you