Thought breastfeeding was going great - apparently I was wrong!!

[Freddie15VES]

My little one is 17 days old and still 100g below her birthweight

We ebf and she always seems content and full but health visitor isn’t happy with how slow the gain is even though she is gaining and wants me to start expressing/bottle feeding

I feel so deflated like I’ve done something wrong

I want to ebf I don’t want to start introducing bottles into the mix 😔

Just feeling like I’ve failed massively

Feel like I should just move to formula and take the stress out of it

Don't stress, seek a second opinion and feed more. Any time baby is fussing, feed first.

Keep up the breastfeeding if you’re enjoying it. Agree a second opinion is a good idea. Breastfeeding is the most wonderful experience if it suits you x

I'm a midwife and breastfeeding counsellor.

I recommend that you carry on just breastfeeding your baby. It can take some babies longer than others to regain their birthweight. And introducing a bottle now is a sure way to ensuring you produce less milk.

What weight was your baby at birth?

Are you getting plenty of wet nappies each day?

Why does she want you to start expressing though? That makes no sense.

Took my baby three weeks to get back to her birthweight. I was getting pressured by doc so I saw a breastfeeding consultant and she was so supportive and reassuring and completely accurate re when baby would hit birthweight etc.
if you are feeling frequently and your baby has plenty of wee and poo, then I really wouldn’t worry , but talking to a breastfeeding consultant might really help.

Exactly. The amount of milk you get when you express is far less than the amount the baby gets when at the breast.

There is no point at all in expressing.

@TheShellBeach

she was 4200g at birth and is now 4100g

she has good wet nappies, probably could be a bit heavier but we received a phone call from the hospital today advising a suspected uti so I’m not sure if that changes anything we’re going back to the hospital tomorrow for another test. But she’s having around 6 heavy wet ones a day and the urine is clear and doesn’t smell dehydrated

im just confused as she latches so well (health visitor said she rarely sees babies this age latch this well so soon) and feeds for around 15-20mins on each boob, so I don’t see how trying to get her to have a bottle will help - I’m just a very confused mama and I don’t know what will happen if she’s below birth weight on Monday

Haha I told a DOCTOR health visitor type this when my now-teen son was a baby and she said, “What makes you think that?” I would have hoped that there was less ignorance around the subject more than a decade later but perhaps not!

I'd see the HV again and ask if she could consider advice that relates to breastfeeding, rather than moving immediately to expressing and formula. Ask if she can refer you to any additional breastfeeding support.

In the meantime, increase the frequency that you are feeding, if you possibly can.

She wants me to feed her by bottle at least 200ml more a day so she is back at birthweight by Monday….i don’t see the massive rush if she’s gaining and having wet nappies. She’s a really happy content baby. I’m just really confused and upset by it all

The breastfeeding helplines are really helpful - you might like to give them a call and talk it over. Often health visitors and midwives aren’t that well informed about breastfeeding, unfortunately.

http://www.nationalbreastfeedinghelpline.org.uk/

Another point to keep in mind OP, and it’s a faff and you probably know it already, is that weighing your baby before and after a feed will tell you how much milk she’s had. One gram is more or less 1ml.

Just in case she’s one of the maniacs who wrongly think that you need to express to see how much your baby is drinking.

I just knew that you'd say your baby was over 4kg at birth!

Two of mine were this weight, and one took three weeks to get back to her birth weight. She gained weight perfectly after that.

I'd say everything was normal, and advise you not to go back to the HV. Well, not for feeding advice.

See a BF counsellor if you need support.

Well, she clearly doesn't understand how BF works.

I'd have no confidence in her advice.

The amount you express is not always less- it really depends on individuals. If baby is not taking enough milk supply will decrease. I express over 300ml every time and that's an established regular amount now.

I would say feed on boob first until baby is finished then express and do a top up (with expressed breast milk) until baby has gained weight.

My baby didn't latch properly due to a tongue tie but kept my supply up by expressing. At around 2 months she's big enough to latch properly and breast feeding is going well.

Providing you are getting several wet nappies a day I'd simply carry on breast feeding your baby and I'd express a little more milk immediately after each feed to stimulate more milk production. Just freeze the breast milk you express. Get your Health Visitor to weigh your baby just after a feed.

Can you get hold of baby scales and weigh to see if your baby is getting enough in feeds? Could also be worth getting a lactation consultant out to assess - my baby was not getting enough of the good fatty hindmilk and the lactation consultant was able to determine this.

be careful you don’t let your want to exclusively breastfeed overpower babies need to be well fed - I have a friend who did this and kept insisting her baby was fine and feeding fine when the HV were telling her baby wasn’t getting enough - she gets very upset now looking back on pics of her obviously underweight baby.

if you do end up introducing a bottle at some stage it’s not a big deal! My supply dropped at 3 months and I introduced combi feeding under guidance of a lactation consultant. I felt like I had the best of both worlds once I got the hang of it! It doesn’t need to be Ebm or formula - it can be both!

Ten per cent of your baby's weight at birth would be 420g.

Yours is nowhere near that! So nothing to worry about.

I just want to stress that fed is best. Doesn’t matter if it’s breast or bottle, you are still being a mother by ensuring your child is fed so you are not a failure in any shape or form.

If you do want to breastfeed, then I agree that it might be worth speaking to a lactation consultant. My first really struggled to latch and the midwife tried to get me to use formula but I wanted to at least try breastfeeding. I had a lactation consultant come at day 8 and she was amazing. She helped me and DS to finally gel together and in the end, I breastfed for 2.5 years. I’m now breastfeeding my second following her initial advice.

If, for whatever reason, breastfeeding just doesn’t work out, then that’s ok. Your baby won’t know any better and the only person who is going to judge is you!

@Basilthymerosemary my issue is though if I express and start producing more milk, and if she’s simply satisfied and too full for me to top her up then aren’t I just going to end up engorged and in pain?!

And don't forget that the charts they use to decide what weight babies should be are all based on bottle fed babies.

This may well happen, yes.
It's foolish advice, OP.

Pay her no heed.

She sounds absolutely fine, nothing suggests you need to express or introduce any top-ups. Your instinct that it is going well sounds right and I'd just carry on as you are.

It's usually HVs who manage to stop women from breastfeeding, by making them lose confidence in their ability to do so.

The way the health visitor is going on about it it’s like the absolute worse thing is happening. We had a shit start, I was in hospital for 9 days (mega stressed and extremely high bp) she then was jaundice which is now only just getting better and now she has this suspected uti! I thought we’d done alright seeing as we’ve only been home and settled for a week now but apparently not!!