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5 year old son is very girly

92 replies

overmummy2701 · 19/02/2024 19:42

Hi,

My 5 year old son is very girly. He has a lot of girl friends, some boy friends, but mainly plays with girls.

He's constantly acting like a little girl and it upsets me, as I'm worried about the future he may face.

Is this just a phase? Can he tell whether he wants to be a girl now?

I ask him now if he is a boy or girl and he always tells me he's a boy and loves girls, but I'm just concerned.

Please - no judgement.

OP posts:
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littleburn · 19/02/2024 20:16

Step back from the gender stereotypes and it's no longer a problem.

Yogatoga1 · 19/02/2024 20:17

You do know it isn’t a choice whether he’s a boy or girl? He’s a boy, and nothing can change biology.

do you wear trousers? Ever had a short haircut? Do you drive a car? If you have do you think that makes you “mannish”?

have a good thing about what “acting girly” means.

this has to be a wind up.

mogtheexcellent · 19/02/2024 20:19

You need to lop his willy off and start buying him pink frilly dresses immediately.

Or you could let him just be himself.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Countrygirlxo · 19/02/2024 20:19

Questioning him will only put doubt in his little head, why would you even ask him that?
My friends little boy has long hair but he's very much a boy, boys also love to dress up in girls clothes or play mummies and babies, mirroring their mum. Maybe even want nail varnish on because he sees you putting some on. None of these mean hes 'not a boy.'
How exactly does he act girly?

Ilovegoldies · 19/02/2024 20:19

I do feel this thread is designed to provoke.

Rosesanddaisies1 · 19/02/2024 20:20

I feel heartbroken for your poor child. You need your head shaken. He’s behaving like a kid. Stop forcing your gender stereotypes and heteronormativity on him.

clockworklime · 19/02/2024 20:21

You don't know whether your child is a boy or a girl?

Brefugee · 19/02/2024 20:22

Stop, it OP. Just stop. What is "girly"? do you believe in sex stereotypes? does he help you tidy up? do the washing up? Does he like playing gentle games, dolls?

there is no such thing as "girly" just harmful stereotypes. Banish them from your thoughts, don't ask him daft questions and try to take your lead from him to do what he wants to do?

pickledandpuzzled · 19/02/2024 20:24

DC swapped personalities at some point. My little cuddly one got all hard nosed. My somewhat hard boiled child he turned into a proper softie.

He’s young. He could be all sorts of things. Give him time to find out who he is. And stop asking him silly questions.

Silverbirchtwo · 19/02/2024 20:24

He's fine let him be what he is, boy likes girls so surprising., lots of boys like to dress up in mum's stuff when little and turn out to be macho males and if not who cares. But as others have said don't confuse him by asking if he's a boy or a girl he knows he's a boy. What his sexual orientation will be you won't know (probably) for quite a few years.

user120405 · 19/02/2024 20:29

Does he have a penis? If so then he’s male. HTH

JaninaDuszejko · 19/02/2024 20:31

Realistically he's most likely to be straight, then gay then trans. The chances of him being trans are massively increased by your behaviour, if you keep questioning his sex then eventually he will start questioning it, particularly if he's autistic (is he?) and you are homophobic (are you? Because being concerned that a 5yo is 'girly' sounds pretty homophobic). Let him be, love him for what he is and don't label or pathologise normal 5 yo behaviour.

falalalalalalalallama · 19/02/2024 20:36

Can he tell whether he wants to be a girl now?

I ask him now if he is a boy or girl and he always tells me he's a boy and loves girls.

Well thank goodness for that. It would seem he has more sense than a lot of adults.

What does this mean exactly? I'm worried about the future he may face.

Are you seriously more worried about "the shame" of being gay, than being trans? Are you seriously saying you'd feel more comfortable if he told you he was really "a girl inside" rather than a boy who comes across feminine?

Do you know what happens to little boys who have adults around them who tell them that changing sex is possible and take them to gender clinics who affirm them as girls?

Boys who start blockers young and then go on to cross sex hormones (and very nearly all of them do) end up not only sterile but they run a serious risk of never maturing sexually.

Meaning they will never grow into a mature, sexually functioning adult. Never understand sexual desire. Never have an adult relationship. They may have surgery to give them a hole that men can have sex with. But that hole won't be made out of their penis like in adult sex changes, because the blockers will ensure it remains tiny, a child's penis. Instead the cavity will be made from another body part such as colon. This cavity is effectively an open wound, and will try to heal. To prevent this, your DS would have to do painful "exercises" with a dilator to keep it open.

Plus, the blocker cause brittle bones, and "brain fog" which it is believed may cause a significant drop in IQ. And he may well be incontinent, have pain and/or numbness.

Sorry to be so explicit, but the gender ideologues don't tell you this stuff, they sugar coat it and that's fucking irresponsible IMO.

Look up Jazz Jennings - and Richie - @ TulipR on twitter - if you don't believe me.

Why on earth would you want this for your DS?

You don't need to answer that, I know why. It's because well meaning idiots have made it sound like you can change sex, and that it's all possible medically. It isn't, it's experimental, barbaric and based on a modern quasi-religion, not medical science.

Alternatively, you could not encourage him to think he's a girl, and instead celebrate him for the gorgeous boy he is - pink and all.

And seek some counselling for yourself, to help process why you think a boy being "girly" is such an issue.

https://twitter.com/TullipR/status/1536422533230206976

K0OLA1D · 19/02/2024 20:42

The OP dropped this and then fucked off

YouJustDoYou · 19/02/2024 20:44

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PickAChew · 19/02/2024 20:46

Of course he's a boy. He simply hasn't read the "how to be a stereotypical boy" handbook.

savethatkitty · 19/02/2024 20:53

Sorry, but I am judging. This seems like it's bothering you. Why? He's only 5, let him be.

sexnotgenders · 19/02/2024 20:58

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Tigger1895 · 19/02/2024 21:01

My 5 year old asked for a kitchen for Christmas 30 years ago, he’s not interested in cooking now.
Don’t think to much into and let your child find his own way.

Questioningquest · 19/02/2024 21:05

I knew some boys like this in primary school. None are trans if that is your worry? I don't think as many people worry when their daughters are "tomboys" for some reason, which is a bit weird because it's the same thing in reverse! It's probably even said as a complement sometimes.

Of the boys I knew like this 1 is gay with a lovely boyfriend. 1 is hetero with a wife and 2 children. 1 is hetero with a new girlfriend every other month. Some teasing in secondary school for 2 of them but both came out the other end fine.

I think it's good if your son likes what he likes and no pressure to like typical things, and that he is able to play with who he likes to play with without pressure to stick to boys only. He'll probably be more well rounded than if he sticks to only boys, trucks, football etc

Redcar78 · 19/02/2024 21:05

I have 5 year old twins the same, they love pink and Barbie. Honestly most boys do at this age, it's gradually beaten out of them by their growing awareness of social norms unfortunately. He'll be fine, don't stress. Love him, let him explore his world and enjoy the things he enjoys 💐

Inyourwildestdreams · 19/02/2024 21:07

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vodkaredbullgirl · 19/02/2024 21:30

Yeah ok

Newgolddream70 · 19/02/2024 21:36

He's 5 and you ask him if he's a boy or a girl?! That's so horrible. I hope this is a wind up.